


from now on

by chanmosphere



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Domestic, Drama, Family Drama, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Fluff, Getting Together, Happy Ending, Kid Fic, M/M, Misunderstandings, Mpreg, Mutual Pining, Racist remarks, Sexual Content, Single Parent Byun Baekhyun, Sort Of, mild violence and mention of alcohol, one sided chenbaek, soft smut(?)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-12 13:20:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 43,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29136189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chanmosphere/pseuds/chanmosphere
Summary: How do you tell your best friend, who is leaving to another country to pursue his dream that you are pregnant with his child?Well, you don't.
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun/Park Chanyeol, Kim Jongin | Kai/Park Chanyeol
Comments: 31
Kudos: 240





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I knooow this is the second time I repost this story, you must be sick of it, I'm sorry! But I promise that this is the last and definite one!

Baekhyun is in shock, unable to stop the tears from rolling down his cheeks as he stares at the blood tests results he holds in his hands. The pressure in his chest stops him from breathing properly and his stomach churns distastefully, making him feel nauseated. 

Or maybe that's just normal, considering he's five weeks pregnant. A month, one week and 99% positively pregnant.

At 26, Baekhyun thinks it should feel like a blessing. It should feel like he's accomplished at least three of his many goals in life: a good, stable job, economic stability and a family; but it feels too far from that, Baekhyun knows he's not ready to raise a child on his own.

It was a mistake, he had too much to drink that night at Jongdae's birthday party and no one even bothered to stop him, but Baekhyun can't blame them, they were probably just as wasted. 

It isn't a secret for his friends, after all that Baekhyun had always have feelings for the man that has been by his side ever since he can remember, the man who has been his shoulder to cry on, the only one who would agree to watch those old American movies Baekhyun loves so much without complaining, the only man who had ever made Baekhyun's heart go crazy inside his chest, his best friend: Park Chanyeol.

The opportunity presented itself for him to take. Chanyeol had been clinging at him all night, drunk and acting like the sweet and caring boyfriend that he wasn't and would never be; but who was him to refuse such an opportunity, probably the only chance he'll ever get to be with Chanyeol in  _ that _ way.

He could always leave the next morning, without Chanyeol knowing and pretend nothing ever happened. That's exactly what Baekhyun did and since then, none of them dared to speak about that seemingly harmless night. 

  
  


🔸

Baekhyun lets out a small sigh, putting the paper down on his lap and closing his eyes for a moment as he rakes through his cabinet of scarce options. What is he going to do? He's not ready to do this, especially not alone.

Telling Chanyeol is off the table, the man has his life already planned. He's always been a stubborn person, persistent and always doing what he believes in, that's what has taken him to where he is now: about to go to America after accepting a job offer as a music producer and lyricist on a huge and very well-known record label.

Chanyeol hadn't even hesitated about taking the job, who would? And who was Baekhyun to truncate his best friend's one and only dream? He can't ruin it for him. There's also the small and insignificant detail that Chanyeol  _ despises _ kids. He hates them and he's never been afraid of being vocal about it, of showing his reluctance towards the small human beings. Not even his beautiful baby niece had been able to crack him; Baekhyun is sure an unwanted baby would be no different.

His phone rings on his bedside table, startling him. Baekhyun wipes his tears with the back of his hand and sniffles, clearing his throat to regain some control of his voice. Jongdae's name flashes insistently on the screen, waiting to be picked up.

"Hey." Baekhyun says, cursing under his breath at how hoarse his voice sounds.

_ "Finally!" _ Jongdae exclaims from the other side, not noticing. Baekhyun sighs in relief.  _ "Are you ready?" _

"Ready for what?" Baekhyun frowns.

_ "Chanyeol's farewell party?" _ Jongdae says and Baekhyun can almost hear in his voice how hard he's rolling his eyes.

"Farewell party? But─ but there's still a month left before he leaves." Baekhyun sounds suddenly alarmed, if Jongdae notices anything, he doesn't comment on it.

_ "Change of plans. He got a call from the label yesterday, they want him there next Monday." _

"That's─ that's a week from now." Baekhyun mumbles.

_ "Short-noticed, yeah. That's why we're having the party today, so he can rearranged his schedule─ wait, he really didn't tell you anything?" _

Baekhyun shakes his head before he answers verbally. "No."

It's unlikely for Chanyeol to not share things with him. Baekhyun was the first one to know about his friend's sexuality, he was the first to know about Chanyeol's first major crush, he was there to help him through his first heartbreak, he was the first to know he was going to America. Baekhyun has always been Chanyeol's first, at least for the most things; it's not an obligation, Baekhyun knows, for Chanyeol to inform him everything about what is going on in his life, but a heads-up would've been nice. The pressure of his situation and the fact that he now has less time to figure out what to do, has him gasping for air. He can't do this.

_ "Well, then, uh..." _ Jongdae rambles after a few seconds of uncomfortable silence  _ "be ready in twenty minutes, I'll pick you up." _

"But Iㅡ" Jongdae hangs up before he can finish his sentence. Baekhyun stares at the black screen for a couple of seconds, he's not in the mood to go out, much less to Chanyeol's party. He's not ready to face the man yet, not knowing how he'd have to act in his presence. Chanyeol's a smart guy and he knows Baekhyun like the palm of his hand, what if he figures everything out without him saying anything? 

Baekhyun shakes his head to get rid of the thoughts; all he has to do is show up and act normally. He  _ can  _ do this.

Twenty minutes is plenty of time, so Baekhyun spends five breathing in and out, taking deep intakes of breath and releasing with a loud huff. It's just a party… a party where there will be alcohol and he'll have to come up with a good excuse as to why he can't drink. A party where he'll be saying goodbye, maybe forever, to his best friend and baby's father.

Baekhyun likes to think of himself as a non-complicated person. He has a daily routine he likes to follow, he has a simple taste in food and a simpler taste in clothes, nothing too striking, so in a little more than ten minutes he's showered and dressed on a pair of tight jeans ─he'll have to make the best of them before he can't wear them anymore─, an un-tucked button-up shirt and his hair neatly styled up. Three minutes later, Jongdae is calling again to say he's outside, waiting for him.

Baekhyun looks at his reflection on the mirror one last time before rushing outside his apartment building. 

"You know, sometimes I envy you." Jongdae says as soon as Baekhyun climbs up his truck.

"Hello to you too." Baekhyun nods, buckling his seatbelt on.

"No, I'm serious. I mean, I gave you twenty minutes, I bet you barely used ten and you still managed to look this good." 

"What did we say about the flirting?" Baekhyun quirks an eyebrow, a slightly amused look in his eyes.

Jongdae shrugs. "What can I say? I'm persistent."

Baekhyun laughs. "Well… keep trying."

"Asshole." Jongdae chuckles. "So, Chanyeol..." He adds as he drives off down the street "he  _ really _ didn't tell you about the call?"

"Really." Baekhyun nods.

"That's weird."

"I guess he was just busy organizing himself." Baekhyun shrugs. "It's not like he has to tell me everything all the time, right?"

"Well, no... but this is important. He's leaving the country and who knows when are we going to see him again. And he  _ does _ tell you everything all the time."

"I'll see him at the party, I'm sure he'll tell me then." Baekhyun says, with a determined tone on his voice, ending the conversation.

Half an hour later, Baekhyun finds himself climbing down Jongdae's truck and looking up at Chanyeol's huge and fancy apartment building. The dreaded feeling in his stomach begins to increase the closer they get to the fifth floor: Chanyeol's floor, and Baekhyun can only pray to whatever it is up there to help him get through this without any trouble and most importantly, without him being stupid enough to let his emotions show.

He unconsciously places a hand over his very much flat stomach and takes a deep breath as the apartment door is finally being pulled open, but instead of his tall best friend, Baekhyun is suddenly face to face with Taewoo. And is not that Baekhyun doesn't like Lee Taewoo, but ever since they met for the first time at one of Chanyeol's many get-togethers, their relationship hasn't been the best. 

There's always a pending tension, a stiffness in the air whenever the both of them are in the same room, with what Taewoo being Chanyeol's ex-boyfriend turned  _ other _ best friend, Baekhyun can't help but feel certain apprehension towards the guy; not because of his past bond with Chanyeol, but because Chanyeol cares for him enough to keep him in his life even when it was Taewoo himself who ended their relationship because he was in love with someone else. Baekhyun remembers taking care of a very heartbroken Chanyeol for days to no end after that, without asking any questions. Because despite everything, Baekhyun has never had the intentions to meddle in Chanyeol's personal life.

Baekhyun put a label to their friendship, but he's not quite sure is entirely accurate. Yes, he is the one Chanyeol goes to whenever he feels sad or happy and he is the one who is always there to share important life moments, but when it comes to Chanyeol's romantic life, he has left Baekhyun, implicitly very clear, that is none of his business and Baekhyun is okay with that, because Baekhyun is a person who knows how to appreciate what he gets. 

"Chanyeol is making drinks, come on in." Taewoo says with a smile on his face, mostly directed to Jongdae, but Baekhyun smiles too, nonetheless. He's not here to ruin the party with his sour mood.

Almost everyone is already there, chatting with drinks in their hands; the music is to a considerable high volume, enough to be considered adequate for a party but not enough to disturb Chanyeol's neighbors and Baekhyun is thankful for that, not wanting to add a headache to his distress. 

"Finally!" Baekhyun hears Chanyeol exclaiming from the kitchen, peeking his head over the wall dividing it from the living room. A minute later he comes out, a tray of cocktails in his hands. He places it over the glass coffee table and quickly moves to wrap his arms around Baekhyun on a tight hug; it has never felt more suffocating, Baekhyun thinks as he hesitantly wraps his arms around his friend's shoulders as well, trying to keep the lower part of his body as far from Chanyeol's as possible, somehow wary and scared that Chanyeol will notice his state if he stays too close for too long. It's a ridiculous mindset, he knows, considering he's not even showing yet, but he can't help it. "Made you your favorite." Chanyeol grins after he releases him, handing him a glass with a yellowish drink in it; it smells strongly like vodka, making Baekhyun's stomach churn in disgust.

"Thank you but... I'm not drinking tonight." He refuses with a tone too polite to be casual. Chanyeol frowns at him and then quirks an incredulous eyebrow.

"Why not? It's my party! I'm leaving in a week and with all the things I have to do I don't know if I'll be able to see you again before I leave!" The words struck Baekhyun in a different way, deeper and sharper; he swallows the hard lump in his throat and holds back the urge to cry.

"I'm sorry, my stomach hasn't been feeling very well. I don't want to end up in the bathroom for the rest of the night." Baekhyun comments, covering with a small laugh the shakiness of his voice.

Chanyeol hums. "Alright then. There's lemonade in the fridge, want some? It'll help with your stomach."

"Yes, please." Baekhyun nods this time, still not in the mood to drink anything, but not wanting to refuse Chanyeol for the second time. "You uh... you didn't tell me about the label calling." He mumbles once Chanyeol is back.

"Yeah, sorry about that. It was last night and I had to change my ticket today and start packing. I forgot." Chanyeol gives him a sheepish smile. 

"It's fine." Baekhyun shakes his head, lips curling up on a tiny smile.

"Are  _ you _ okay? You seem a little off."

Baekhyun blinks as he stares at Chanyeol for a few seconds too long. "Yeah." He answers in the end. "Just, you know... my stomach." Chanyeol nods and it's so awkward he feels like throwing up. "Go away, I'm not the only one here." Baekhyun pushes him away playfully, encouraging him to interact with the others, but in reality, not wanting to have his friend around for longer than necessary. Chanyeol winks at him before wandering around while Baekhyun goes to greet the rest of their friends.

Baekhyun doesn't talk to Chanyeol that much after that small conversation. The taller busies himself in the kitchen, making drinks after drinks for everyone... with Taewoo helping. Baekhyun doesn't dare to step in, so he stays in the living room, pretending Junmyeon's jokes are funny and forcing himself to laugh when everyone else does. His eyes wander to the kitchen from time to time, his heart squeezing painfully at the sight of his best friend and Taewoo laughing at whatever Chanyeol is saying. Chanyeol's jokes  _ are _ funny.

"And Baekhyun here" Jongdae's arms come up to wrap around his shoulder, pulling Baekhyun out of his thoughts "still refuses to date me." 

"Why would Baekhyun date you?" Chanyeol butts in the conversation, arriving with a new serving of drinks that disappear in a second. "He's too good for you." He adds with a scoff.

"Who should he date, then? You?" Jongdae snorts. Baekhyun shifts uncomfortably under Jongdae's arm, but he waits expectantly for Chanyeol's answer, although he's not really sure he wants to hear what he has to say.

"Why not?" Chanyeol says, shrugging a shoulder as he brings his glass up to his mouth and takes a small sip. Baekhyun feels the air missing from his lungs and his cheeks heat up at the way everyone is looking at him. He suddenly can't breathe. "I'm funnier than you, taller, smarter, better looking, that's obvious."

"And you're also leaving. You're not coming back and Baekhyun will be left here, all alone for me to take care of." Jongdae teases, a smug grin splattered on his lips, pressing Baekhyun closer to his body.

"As if. I'm sure he knows better and he can take care of himself, right Baek? " Chanyeol turns his head at him, an expectant look in his eyes. 

It's suddenly too much. Jongdae's arms around his shoulders feel suffocating, the way they're talking about him as if he's not sitting right there and how everyone's eyes are on him, feels like a rope constricting his throat. "Excuse me." Baekhyun manages to mumble out, shaking his friend's arm off of him and rushing towards the bathroom.

Baekhyun closes the door behind him and leans against it, breathing deeply to try and calm himself. Coming to this party was definitely a terrible idea, he should have just stayed at home and bid goodbye to Chanyeol later on the week. A text would have been enough, he's sure, probably Chanyeol wouldn't have mind.

A minute in the bathroom feels like an eternity. Baekhyun can hear his friends' chatter under the music going back to normal. 

A knock startles him and he jumps away from the door, staring at it full of fear. 

Baekhyun doesn't even know why he's acting like this, but he blames it on his hormones being all over the place. It at least gives him some peace of mind and convinces himself he's not going nuts.

"Baek, are you okay?" It's Chanyeol.

"Um, yeah. Just a minute!" Baekhyun exclaims, putting on a show of flushing the toilet and turning on the running water on the sink. He quickly splashes his face and dries it with the hand towel Chanyeol keeps on a hook next to the mirror.

Baekhyun opens the door slowly, bracing himself for what's coming. He knows his friend is here to ask questions and he confirms it when Baekhyun finds him leaning against the door, a look on his face that tells Baekhyun that he should better start talking.

"I'm okay." Baekhyun says, answering a silent question. "Really."

"Is not your stomach, is it?" Chanyeol asks, but there's a knowing tone in his voice that has Baekhyun trembling a little.

"It is." Baekhyun nods.

"Baek, I know you, please don't lie to me."

After a few seconds, Baekhyun sighs. "I'm just... it's just─ you're leaving and I─"

"Baek─"

"It's stupid, I know, but I can't help it. I don't want to miss you."

Baekhyun looks down.

"Hey." Chanyeol mumbles, straightening up and taking Baekhyun by the hand to pull him into a soft embrace. "I promise you we'll keep in touch. We'll Skype every day; you can call me whenever you want, we'll text each other and I'll be coming back for the holidays."

Baekhyun smiles, because when Chanyeol says it like that, it gives him a sense of hope, but deep inside he knows it won't last.

"Should I remind you of the huge time zone difference?" He asks, leaning his head on Chanyeol's shoulder. 

"We'll make it work. You'll see."

Baekhyun nods, tightening his arms around Chanyeol's back. It's easier this way, to pretend everything is going to be okay and that everything is going to be the same. But time does not forgive and Baekhyun knows that sooner or later, he'll become nothing more but a distant memory for Chanyeol.


	2. Chapter 2

Baekhyun can’t really decide if having Jongdae over almost every day is a good thing or not. He always arrives one hour after Baekhyun comes back home from work, around six and spends the rest of the evening being one with his couch and eating Baekhyun’s stash of chips and cookies.

Jongdae has had a crush on him since forever and the man doesn’t even bother on hiding it, in short, Jongdae is shameless and the fact that Baekhyun is not interested in him in that way, doesn’t seem to affect him. 

_ “I don’t care if you don’t like me that way.” _ Jongdae had told him one day, after confessing his feelings.  _ “But I don’t want to lose you as a friend.” _

It had been uncomfortable at first, but after months of having Jongdae around, Baekhyun got used to his longing looks and his occasional out of place comments; his fond smiles and his flirtiness. It’s kind of cute, Baekhyun has to admit, and even though he would love to be able to give Jongdae a chance, he can’t and his friend is more than aware of that.

“Baek!” Jongdae calls from the living room.

Baekhyun moves around the kitchen, making himself the peanut butter and jelly sandwich he’s been craving all day. 

“What?!” He exclaims, voice muffled by the finger he keeps in his mouth while he licks off the rests of sweet strawberry jam.

“Where do you have your iPad charger? It’s dying!”

Baekhyun rolls his eyes but smiles still. “Nightstand on the right side, first drawer!” He instructs.

Jongdae doesn’t reply, but by all the noise coming from the living room, Baekhyun guesses he’s already moving around the house. 

It takes Baekhyun a moment to remember what he’s keeping inside that same drawer; his eyes widen as he drops his sandwich back onto the plate and runs off, hoping it won’t be too late. But it is and Jongdae is already sitting on his bed, frowning while he holds the piece of paper in his hands.

“Dae.” He calls, slowly, carefully.

“What is this, Baek?” Jongdae asks, confusion printed all over his face.

“Iㅡ”

"You─" Jongdae visibly swallows "you're pregnant." He mumbles, doesn't even asks. Baekhyun remains silent, waiting for his friend to say something else. "For how long have you known?"

Baekhyun sighs. "I started feeling sick a couple of weeks ago. At first I thought it was just a stomach bug or something, but then my doctor said there was nothing wrong with me, so he recommended blood tests, just to make sure and well... I got the results the day of Chanyeol's party. I'm almost six weeks along."

"Six weeks?" Jongdae looks up at him, eyes wide in shock. "Wait..." he makes a pause. Baekhyun internally groans at his friend's great math skills "then that means... my birthday, really?"

Jongdae adds and even though he's trying really hard to hide it, Baekhyun can see the hurt in his eyes.

"I'm sorry, Dae─"

"But the only person I saw you disappearing with wasㅡ oh." Revelation hits him. "What the fuck, Baekhyun!" Jongdae jumps up the bed. Baekhyun takes a step back, surprised by the sudden outburst. "When were you planning on telling me? When are you planning on telling  _ Chanyeol _ ?! He's leaving in two days!"

Baekhyun snatches the paper away from Jongdae's hands. "I am not telling him anything." He grumbles as he walks out of his room. 

"What? Why not?!" Jongdae follows him closely.

"Because it was a mistake! It should've never happened. It won't be me the one ruining this opportunity for him." Baekhyun says, walking back to the kitchen to angrily start making himself another PB&J sandwich. 

"Ruining─" Jongdae shakes his head in disbelief "are you even listening to yourself? What about you?"

"What about  _ me _ ?" Baekhyun shrugs.

Jongdae groans. "Are you going to do this alone? It's a baby, Baek... a whole new responsibility!"

"I know!" Baekhyun exclaims, dropping the butter knife he's been spreading the jam with. "Do you think that hasn't crossed my mind?! I'm fucking terrified, Jongdae. But what do you want me to do?"

"Uh, tell Chanyeol?!"

Baekhyun opens his mouth to yell again, but decides against and instead, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. "Chanyeol and I have very different life goals. He already decided that his place is in America and I am perfectly fine here. None of us will be willing to make changes, to make sacrifices. And do I have to remind you just how much Chanyeol dislikes kids?"

"But this is  _ his _ child, Baek."

Baekhyun stubbornly shakes his head. "I already made up my mind. I won't tell Chanyeol about this baby and I'm asking you to please respect my decision."

"This is not a good idea." Jongdae lets out a long sigh. "Yeah, okay. I'm sorry." He ends up saying. "But... you know he deserves to know, right?"

"Yes, I know." Baekhyun nods. "But it's better this way. I don't want to make him feel like he has to stay just because of me."

"You can be really stubborn." Jongdae grumbles, but then a resigned smiles crosses his face. "You know you can count on me for anything.” He says then, taking a step closer and placing a hand over Baekhyun's shoulder to squeeze reassuringly.

"I know, thank you." Baekhyun smiles as he turns around to face his friend. Jongdae has a soft look in his eyes that makes Baekhyun's stomach flip; he knows he won't ever be able to return Jongdae's feelings the same way, but that doesn't mean the guy doesn't have a special place in his heart. So Baekhyun reaches for him and wraps his arms around his friend on a tight hug.

"I'll be here of you." Jongdae mumbles, rubbing his hand up and down Baekhyun's back. 

"I'm scared."

"It's okay." Jongdae hugs him tighter. "Everything's going to be okay."

"Can we not tell anything to anyone yet? At least until Chanyeol leaves, I don't want to risk it."

"Yeah, sure." Jongdae nods, chin bumping against Baekhyun's shoulder.

"Thank you." Baekhyun repeats, lower this time. 

Baekhyun is thankful for having someone as Jongdae around, that despite of being hurting due the situation, still decides to stay by his side. Baekhyun knows he doesn't deserve it, but he will hold onto Jongdae for as long as the man allows him to be in his life.

🔸️

By Sunday morning, they are all gathered at the airport, ready to see Chanyeol get in a plane and fly to the other side of the world.

Baekhyun sticks to Jongdae, allowing him to keep his hand over his lower back as a way to show him emotional support. He doesn't miss the questioning looks Chanyeol throws at them, but Baekhyun limits himself to smile and let everyone else do the talking, he doesn't trust his voice and he doesn't want to break down crying in front of all of his friends. 

Chanyeol starts saying goodbye one by one when the voice of the woman announcing that his flight is ready to board is heard through the speakers. He's fast with everyone, he has to be, if he wants to finish and be on time at the gates.

"Take care of him." Chanyeol mumbles in Jongdae's ear. Baekhyun doesn't miss the way his friend stiffens in the taller's arms, but if Chanyeol notices it, he doesn't comment on it.

"I will." Jongdae says, sounding rather reluctant. Baekhyun wants to whack him in the back of the head.

"I'm going to miss you so much." Chanyeol tells him when he finally gets to him, tightly pressing him against his body.

"Me too." Baekhyun mumbles, arms looping around his shoulders. 

"Don't be a stranger, please."

"I won't." Baekhyun replies, unsure if he'll be able to keep that promise.

Chanyeol pulls away when the woman repeats the number of his flight, he smiles and gives Baekhyun a small kiss on the cheek to then take his bag to get on the queue. 

Chanyeol waves one last time before disappearing through the doors, being that the last time Baekhyun gets to see his face.


	3. Chapter 3

Being pregnant isn't that bad, putting aside the nausea, the back pains, the weird cravings, the constant trips to the bathroom, the sleepless nights, the swollen limbs and the fact that his pants don't fit him anymore, it really is... not that bad. 

The feeling of knowing he has another human being growing inside him fascinates Baekhyun so much, to the point that he could sit for hours, just staring at his growing belly with wide eyes, managing to worry Jongdae up to the core. But Baekhyun just laughs it off, he doesn't have the words to explain to his friend what he's feeling at the moment, anyway.

The first three months flew by too fast, in Baekhyun's opinion. Changes began to be more obvious, not only on his body, but also, his surroundings. 

Jongdae temporarily moved to his couch, despite of Baekhyun's insistence that it was not necessary; his friend wanted to be there to take care of him and be on the watch just in case that anything happened. Also because Jongdae didn't trust him anymore to be on his own after that time he got a call from Baekhyun at 3 in the morning, from a gas station, after his car broke down in the middle of the street when he decided it was a good idea to go out to get that chocolate cake he had been craving so badly. Jongdae had yelled at him for good ten minutes, managing to make Baekhyun cry and have the convenience store attendant calling the police on him. It took him a lot of convincing and a three tier chocolate cake for Baekhyun to finally forgive him. 

Things with Chanyeol weren't going so well; just like Baekhyun had predicted, the more time it passed, the more the more busy the man got. The three times a week calls and every day messages started to slow in quantity and soon, in quality as well, with just a few words exchanged between them, mostly because they were too tired to actually engage in a conversation. The time difference didn't help either. 

Baekhyun refused to Skype with him, scared that Chanyeol would notice his swollen stomach. Even when knowing that he could lie to him, Baekhyun didn't feel like giving any kind of explanations.

By the time Baekhyun reached the half of his second trimester, he was a complete emotional mess. He had completely stopped all types of communication with Chanyeol; it had been a hard choice, but it was the best for everyone. Baekhyun was left feeling more alone than ever despite having Jongdae by his side 24/7. A part of him kept repeating that it was just not enough. 

Baekhyun spent his days angry at the world and his nights crying until his eyes stung and felt forced to fall asleep. He missed Chanyeol, more than he ever thought he would, but he had come to terms with the fact that he's probably never going to see him again and even when it hurts, Baekhyun knows he will be able to live with it. Knowing that in a few months, he won't be alone anymore.

When the eight month kicks in, Baekhyun finds himself sitting on the couch of his living room, hands protectively placed over his stomach and eyes perched on his lap, feeling the heaviness of three pair of eyes on him: Junmyeon, Sehun and Minseok staring at him in disbelief after finally confessing who the other father of his baby was. There was no point in hiding it anymore. Minseok and Junmyeon had reacted better than what Baekhyun had expected, and even when it took a lot of coaxing to convince Sehun to not call Chanyeol and spill everything, he managed to calm him down and explain the situation better. They had been understanding and supportive, Baekhyun couldn't ask for better friends.

🔸

Jongdae looks up from the book he's reading, with his legs stretched over the couch, when he hears the soft thudding of socked feet approaching. He looks at Baekhyun and frowns, letting out a silent sigh as he puts down the book and sits up properly to give his friend some space to sit.

Baekhyun doesn't acknowledge him at first, plopping down on the other side of the couch and taking the remote control to turn the TV on while he carries a pint of ice cream in one hand and a spoon in his mouth.

"Again?" Jongdae asks carefully, the last thing he wants is to unleash his friend's wrath.

"Again what?" Baekhyun says, spoon still in his mouth.

"This is the third time you eat ice cream today."

"And? I'm pregnant and about to pop out. Let me live, Kim."

"It's too much sugar."

"Baby likes it." Baekhyun speaks over the spoon.

"You've been blaming the baby for everything that happens to you lately."

"Well, isn't it, really?"

Jongdae rolls his eyes. "You're going to have a sugar-dependent baby."

Baekhyun sighs, puffing his cheeks and glancing down at the half empty pint of ice cream; he knows Jongdae is right, but is not like he can help it, his baby is always hungry. 

"Fine." Baekhyun finally says, struggling to get up to return the ice cream to the fridge. Jongdae smiles in victory and returns to his book.

He's halfway reading a sentence when he hears the loud tinkling of metal hitting something hard. Jongdae puts his book down again and leans towards his left side to have a better view from the kitchen.

"Baek?" Jongdae calls. He receives no answer. "Baekhyun? Everything alright?"

"Uh..." He hears Baekhyun's muffled voice. "I think... no. Dae, I think Baby is coming." Jongdae chokes on his own saliva as he scrambles around the couch, jumping up and rushing to the kitchen to find Baekhyun bent over, supporting himself on the kitchen island.

"What? What?" Jongdae asks, out of breath, eyes dancing around. 

"My bag, it's in the nursery room."

"Right, yes. Bag" Jongdae bobs his head up and down rapidly without moving an inch.

"Jongdae! The bag!"

Jongdae yelps loudly, but this time he runs off towards the nursery room and shuffles around for a couple of seconds before remembering they keep the bag inside the closet. By the time he makes it back, Baekhyun had managed to transport himself to the living room and sit on the couch. He's panting, breathing hard as he clutches the front of his white shirt tightly; he groans and whimpers in pain every now and then. 

"Come on, can you stand up?" Jongdae asks him, offering him his arm for support.

"Yeah." Baekhyun nods, breathing through his nose. "I think so."

"Slowly." Jongdae mumbles, carefully pulling Baekhyun up to his feet.

“It fucking hurts.” Baekhyun whines, his arm placing itself around Jongdae’s shoulders for better support.

Jongdae nods, giving Baekhyun a sympathetic look while he urges him to walk with him to the door. He manages to get them both to the parking lot and with the help of the security guard, Jongdae gets Baekhyun inside his truck. 

“Why do you have to have such a monster truck?” Baekhyun groans and pants. “We could have taken my car!”

“Yeah… didn’t cross my mind.” Jongdae mumbles as he starts the engine.

He steps on the accelerator and drives off, down the street and hoping Baekhyun will hold it in until they get to the hospital, because as much as he loves Baekhyun, he  _ definitely _ doesn't want to have blood and baby  _ stuff _ all over his leather seats.

🔸

Jongdae stands by the hospital's entrance as he watches with wide eyes as one of the nurses wheels Baekhyun down the hallway, petrified and absolutely terrified.

He doesn't really know what to do, and hearing Baekhyun's screams echoing through the walls doesn't help at all. 

He thinks he probably should follow Baekhyun and the nurse, be the supportive friend he's been all these months and be there for Baekhyun when he needs him the most, but his feet are glued to the floor and his brain is telling him to turn around and run the fuck out of there. 

If he thinks logically, he comes to the conclusion that he shouldn't even be here. This is not his child and certainly, it will never be, because no matter how much he cares for Baekhyun, how much he's there to support him, Baekhyun will never see him as more than just a good friend and that fucking hurts, but also, the sole thought of leaving Baekhyun while he's in pain, with a child and alone, has Jongdae's heart crumbling into millions of tiny pieces.

He can't do that, even if he sometimes feels like suffocating for having Baekhyun so close and yet so far.

Gathering all the courage he can, Jongdae furrows his brows on a determined frown and runs off on the same direction the nurse took Baekhyun to, managing to catch up with them while they wait for the elevator to come down.

"Baek." Jongdae mumbles, standing next to a panting Baekhyun.

"You're here." Baekhyun says. Jongdae can hear how heavily he's breathing through his nose. "I thought you'd leave me."

Jongdae shakes his head. "Never." He smiles and wraps his fingers around the hand Baekhyun is offering him.

The elevator doors  _ bings _ open and the nurse pushes the chair in, dragging Jongdae along.

"Where are you taking him?" Jongdae asks when he sees the red numbers on the board going up and up.

"Directly to the OR. That shouldn't be happening." The woman points at Baekhyun's lap. Only then Jongdae notices the dark and wet patch on his friend's sweatpants.

Struggling to breathe, Baekhyun looks down as well. "Is thatㅡ is that blood?" He looks up at Jongdae. "What is going on? That wasn't there earlierㅡ"

"Did you walk after the pain started?" Baekhyun nods, tightening his hold around Jongdae's hand. "It's probably nothing to worry about, but we still need to get you into surgery right away, okay?"

"Daeㅡ" Baekhyun groans.

"I'm here."

"I'm scared." 

"Me too." Jongdae mumbles as they finally reach their floor.

The doors open again. The nurse's steps are hurried, almost urgent. She stops in front of the blue double doors and looks at Jongdae.

"I'm sorry, you can't pass through this point." She gives him an apologetic smile.

"What? Butㅡ"

"I'm sorry sir. You can wait here, we'll bring news as soon as possible."

Baekhyun nods and slowly lets go off of Jongdae's hand.

"I'll be fine." It's the last thing he says before the nurse pushes him through the doors, leaving Jongdae with his heart on his throat behind.

Jongdae manages to call Junmyeon, Sehun and Minseok, hands shaking and eyes blurry with tears. They arrive minutes later.

He doesn't really feel like being alone.

The hours tick away slowly. The waiting area is painfully silent, Jongdae can hear Sehun sipping on his coffee and Junmyeon typing on his phone.

"Why don't you sit? You've been walking around for two hours." Minseok says, worried.

"I can't sit down. I feel like throwing up."

"He's fine." Junmyeon butts in. "We would know by now if something went wrong."

"You're not helping, hyung." Sehun rolls his eyes.

"I'm just saying that bad news always come faster than the good ones."

"Shut up or leave." Jongdae grumbles, opting to ignore his friends and keep pacing around the area.

Finally, two more hours later, the same nurse who had taken Baekhyun away earlier comes back, a serene expression on her face.

She recognizes him immediately and slowly approaches him.

"Are you baby Byun's father?"

"Uh..." Jongdae glances at his friends "no, but I'll be taking care of everything."

She nods. "Alright, follow me." The nurse asks him and Jongdae rushes behind her.

"Is he okay?"

"He's fine, probably waking up as we speak."

"Andㅡ and the baby? I mean, the bloodㅡ"

"We… had some complications during the surgery; his body was under a lot of stress, but he managed through and both of them are perfectly fine." She assures him.

Jongdae lets out a long sigh of relief.

She stops in front of a recovery room and smiles before pushing the door open.

Baekhyun is lying on the bed, stomach all wrapped up in bandages and the IV vial connected to the back of his hand. His eyes are barely open and he looks kind of beaten up.

"Can he talk?" Jongdae asks as he gets closer to the bed.

The nurse nods. 

"Not so much, though, he has to rest for when we bring in the baby in a moment. I'll leave you for now."

"Thank you." Jongdae mumbles, then the nurse is gone. "Hey."

"Hello." Baekhyun's voice is hoarse, a dopey smile spreads on his lips while Jongdae pulls the chair in the room closer to the bed.

"How are you feeling?"

"High." Baekhyun giggles.

Jongdae chuckles. "Does it hurt?"

Baekhyun weakly shakes his head. "Not right now. The nurse just drugged me."

"I was freaking out, out there. The guys are here too."

Baekhyun nods. "The baby... did you see him?"

"Not yet. He'll be here in a moment."

"Thank you, for not leaving me earlier. I know I'm not your responsibility andㅡ"

Jongdae shakes his head, interrupting him. "Don't mention it. You needed me."

Baekhyun opens his mouth to reply, but then the doors open and the same nurse walks in, pushing inside the small carrier. A blue bundle slowly shifting around.

The nurse presses a small button under the bed and the upper part begins to lift up, leaving Baekhyun on a slight sitting position, enough to accommodate his baby without hurting himself.

"He's heavy." She warns him as she places him on his arms.

Baekhyun can't help it as soon as his baby's warmth envelops him. His eyes fill with tears and a small sob escapes his mouth.

He has his eyes closed, his skin is still a little red and his cheeks are chubby. Baekhyun knows is too soon to be looking for similar features, but he hopes, with all his heart, his baby will have Chanyeol's beautiful eyes.

"How is he?" Jongdae asks, peeking a little, unsure if he should take a closer look or just stay where he is.

"Come and see yourself." Baekhyun glances at him and smiles. 

"Uh, I..."

"Come on, don't be scared. He won't bite."

Smiling awkwardly, Jongdae stands up and hovers over Baekhyun and the baby.

The nurse passes him the warm bottle so he can start feeding him.

"I'll be back in a while." She announces before leaving again. 

"Does he, uh... has Chanyeol's ears?" Jongdae asks.

Baekhyun laughs, wincing in pain when he adds too much pressure on his abdomen.

His baby is already hungrily sucking on the bottle.

"I think it's too soon to know that."

"Well, I hope he doesn't. Poor kid." Jongdae scoffs. 

"They're cute!" Baekhyun exclaims, whimpering at the pain again.

"Just for you, Baek. Just for you."

Baekhyun's lips curl up on a smile as he looks down at his baby; his eyelids trembling slightly at how hard he's sucking. 

"Have you thought about a name?"

"Hmm..." Baekhyun looks at his baby, then at Jongdae. "Daehyun." He says without hesitating.

Jongdae looks at him, eyes wide and cheeks burning up. "That's... that's a pretty name."

"It is. I'll be forever grateful to you and I want my son to grow up with you in his life."

Jongdae swallows hard. Oh how he wishes Baekhyun's words would have a different meaning, but he knows that's as far as he can go. He'll gladly take it.

"I'm not going anywhere." Jongdae smiles, nonetheless, because seeing the fond look in Baekhyun's eyes while he carefully caresses the back of Daehyun's tiny hand is enough to make his heart feel at peace.

If Baekhyun is happy, he is happy.


	4. Chapter 4

_ Four years later… _

"Shit shit shit." Baekhyun curses under his breath as he runs around the kitchen, fixing himself a cup of coffee and burning his fingers with the toast that just jumped out of the toaster.

He's late for work. Today of all days. Today that he has a very important meeting that he'll be directing. 

He checks on his watch, he has only 30 minutes to finish his impromptu breakfast and arrive at his office if he wants to see a smile on the ogre's face that he has for a boss. 

It took him months to convince the woman that his department needed to take a new path to improve their management and him, being the head of it, had been given the task to present his propositions. 

If Daehyun hadn't gone down with a fever last night, he wouldn't be running around like a madman.

Baekhyun hears the beep of the front door being open. 

Jongdae had texted him earlier to ask about Daehyun's well-being and Baekhyun had lashed out on him all of his morning frustrations and Jongdae, being the good friend he is, offered himself to stay with Daehyun for a few more hours before daycare. 

"Are you sure you're okay with this?" Baekhyun asks as he puts on his jacket, already by the door. "I can still call his babysitter."

Jongdae shakes his head. "It's okay, I just need to make a call and let them know I will be late today."

Baekhyun stops for a moment and takes a deep breath. "We owe you our lives by now."

Jongdae chuckles. "Leave or you're not gonna make it."

"You know where everything is. I'll pick up Dae later."

"Yeah, yeah." Jongdae nods, pushing Baekhyun out of the apartment.

Once alone, Jongdae turns around at the silent living room and then looks at his watch.

It's almost nine in the morning and Daehyun is still sleeping. He must have had it pretty rough last night for him to sleep in this late. Usually, he's like a little clock, waking up at 7 every morning, ready for his dad to just change him and give him his breakfast before the two of them head out for the day: Baekhyun for work and Daehyun for daycare.

Jongdae walks to the boy's room and slowly opens the door, careful of not making much noise, but Daehyun is already awake when he walks inside, curled up on his bed and hugging his favorite dinosaur plushie against his chest.

Daehyun looks up at him as he approaches the bed and sits down on the floor to be on his level.

"Hey." Jongdae smiles, pressing his hand over the boy's forehead, just to make sure the fever is completely gone. "Good morning."

"Morning uncle Dae." He mumbles groggily, rubbing the back of his hand against his eye.

"Are you feeling okay?" Daehyun nods. "Are you hungry?" Daehyun nods again. "Alright, let's see what we can make you. Want me to carry you?"

Daehyun silently stretches his arms at him, waiting to be picked up.

Daehyun smells like honey and a very faint touch of Baekhyun's own berries' shampoo, Jongdae notices as he sits him down on the kitchen table while he gets to make them both something quick and gentle for their stomachs.

The boy follows his every move, just as any other curious kid his age would do. His large, round eyes, bright and wide open.

It took Baekhyun a few months to get used to the fact that he wasn't alone anymore, that there was someone else who needed him to survive, but he had eventually learnt to organize himself. Baekhyun is an amazing father and Daehyun is an even more amazing kid: a healthy boy, polite, sweet and hyperactive, extremely curious and adorable.

Jongdae had tried to push the thought of Daehyun being Chanyeol's son to the back of his mind several times, but it turned out to be impossible.

Park Chanyeol is everywhere: in Baekhyun's mind, in Baekhyun's heart and clearer than ever, in Daehyun's eyes. They have that same peculiar almond shape, large and pretty; they shine with the same mischievousness and quirk Jongdae remembers seeing on his friend's eyes before.

Chanyeol lives in Daehyun's eyes and there's no way of denying that. He also has the same pink lips; Baekhyun's cute nose and thankfully, his  _ normal _ ears ㅡthank the Heavensㅡ; dark hair and soft, fair, baby skin. He's truly an angel... except when he's not and almost makes Baekhyun cry along with him when he's being impossible. 

"Okay, there you go." Jongdae pushes a plastic bowl at him. "Oatmeal and strawberries." Daehyun scrunches his nose. "What? I thought you liked it."

"My tummy hurts." Daehyun pouts, a small frown appearing on his face. 

"But you have to eat something, baby, so you can feel better."

Daehyun shakes his head. "I want daddy."

"Daddy is working, you'll see him soon." As soon as the words leave Jongdae's mouth, Daehyun's eyes fill with tears.

Well, this is going to be harder than what he thought.

🔸

Jongdae can say he now understands the difference between living with a 4 year old and visit, spoil and bring gifts every once in a while to that same 4 year old. He now regrets telling Baekhyun  _ it can't be that bad _ , whenever the man would complain about how difficult Daehyun could be sometimes.

The boy hasn't stopped crying for a good 30 minutes, refusing to tell Jongdae what it is that is wrong with him and calling for Baekhyun non-stop. Jongdae telling him his daddy won't be able to make it soon and only making him cry harder. 

Jongdae almost cries along with him, too.

Daycare is out of the table when 20 minutes before having to leave, Daehyun's fever comes back and the crying just increases. 

Jongdae has to call work back to let them know he won't be able to show up. Taking care of a sick child proved to be harder than he thought and not feeling entirely capable of doing it, Jongdae calls Daehyun's babysitter, not wanting to disturb Baekhyun at work and worse, have him think he's useless, only to be turned down by the woman saying she can't make it on such short notice.

He gets a taste of what is like to be a parent and Jongdae comes to the conclusion that he's definitely not ready for it yet.

It's exhausting, not to mention complicated. Baekhyun doesn't get enough credits for doing it everyday. 

The idea of Daehyun seeing him as a father has crossed his mind a few times in the past, Jongdae has to admit, but maybe, it's just the fact that he still can't get over Baekhyun. In his heart, Jongdae still holds a little hope that maybe one day, the older man will see how much he cares, how important they are to him, how much love he has to give.

But that's just wishful thinking and the reality is harsher than Jongdae would like to accept because for one, the fact that Chanyeol  _ is _ Daehyun's dad will never change for Baekhyun; two, Baekhyun will never return his feelings and three, maybe being a father is not his thing after all. Sure, he loves Daehyun with all his heart, but Jongdae can't see himself doing this on a 24/7 basis. 

Perhaps, if Daehyun wasn't part of the equationㅡ Jongdae shakes his head, a terrible feeling of guilt settling up in his stomach at his thoughts as he watches Daehyun slowly munch on the turkey sandwich he made for lunch. He can't be that selfish, wish for Daehyun to not exist so he could have a chance with his dad. Not when the boy is Baekhyun's purest and only source of happiness. His eyes could light up the entire universe whenever Baekhyun sees his son, Jongdae now can't imagine how the older's life would be without Daehyun in it.

"Uncle." Daehyun's tiny voice pulls him out of his thoughts. The boy still looks a little drowsy from the fever Jongdae managed to cool down earlier. Daehyun shows him his empty cup.

"You want more juice?" Jongdae asks.

Daehyun nods. "Please."

Jongdae pours more apple juice in the plastic cup and smiles at the kid.

"Finish your lunch and then we can watch a movie, okay?"

"Okay." Daehyun mumbles, proceeding to keep munching on what is left of his sandwich. "But... will daddy be mad because I missed school?" The boy asks, eyes fixed on his plate.

"He won't. We're going to explain what happened and he'll understand." 

"I don't like when daddy's mad at me." Daehyun's voice quivers on the last word and a small sniffle is heard.

Jongdae rushes to his side, having had enough crying from the boy for an entire lifetime.

"He won't be mad, I promise you." Jongdae rubs the boy's arm soothingly. 

He stays by Daehyun's side until he finishes eating and then, he sends him to the living room to watch tv while he cleans the kitchen.

Leaving Daehyun to pick a movie from his DVD collection, it isn't a surprise when he hands him Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone.

A weird choice for a four year old, but as weird as it is, Daehyun loves it and Baekhyun feeds his fascination by reading him the books every night before going to sleep. Jongdae wouldn't be surprised either if by now, Baekhyun knew every word by heart.

"Harry Potter marathon?" He asks, quirking an eyebrow, even though he already knows what the answer is going to be.

Daehyun nods as he climbs up the couch and waits for his uncle to set up the home theater.

As soon as Jongdae sits on the couch, Daehyun moves closer to him, cuddling on his side.

By the time the final credits of the second movie roll up, Jongdae is lying on the couch, mouth half open and snoring; an equally asleep Daehyun sprawled out on Jongdae's chest, drooling on his shirt and whimpering like a puppy.

🔸

Baekhyun has never felt a more terrible feeling than the one he felt when he arrived at the daycare to pick Daehyun up and the teacher at the entrance told him that Jongdae, his emergency contact had called to let them know Daehyun was sick.

Baekhyun had stormed out without letting the woman finish talking and on top of that, Jongdae isn't answering his phone.

Baekhyun struggles with his phone in between his shoulder and ear, still trying to get in contact with his stupid friend ㅡhow could he not tell him his son's fever was backㅡ and open the door at the same time.

When he finally manages to get the security code right, Baekhyun doesn't even bother to removing his shoes or leaving his bag. He rushes to the living room, his heart beating in his ears.

"Jongdㅡ" The words die in his mouth when he lays eyes on the scene of his friend and his son snoring on his couch.

Baekhyun feels his blood freely flow through his veins again and his heart beating normally again. He lets out a long, silent sigh and carefully places his bag on the floor and goes to take his shoes off at the door.

As much as he doesn't want to wake his baby up, he also doesn't want any of them to be sore later.

Baekhyun carefully lifts Daehyun in his arms, the baby waking up for a second, whining a little as he gets comfortable on his dad's arms before falling asleep again. 

Baekhyun takes him to his room and as soon as he feels his bed, he reaches for his dinosaur, rolls over and starts softly snoring again. Baekhyun chuckles, kissing the back of his head before leaving the room.

When he goes back to the living room, Jongdae is awake already and sitting up, stretching his arms and neck.

"I was going to wake you up." Baekhyun says as he sits down on the couch.

"Yeah, I kind of missed Dae's weight over me."

"Care to explain what happened?" Baekhyun frowns, leaning in a little as he waits for an answer. "Daehyun's teacher told me you called and... what about work?"

"I called in sickㅡ"

"Jongdae." Baekhyun groans.

"I called Jinri, but she couldn't make it, family matters and no way I was going to drop Daehyun at the daycare sick as he was, his fever came back but I managed it."

"Why didn't you call me?"

"I figured you would be busy, I didn't want to bother you either."

"I feel terrible now. You know you don't have to do these things." Baekhyun sighs.

"I do it because I care for you guys."

"I know you do, but it doesn't feel fair." Baekhyun looks down, biting his lower lip as he searches for the right words to say without rubbing salt on his friend's open wound. 

"I love you both."

"Jongdae, I know and Iㅡ I just don'tㅡ I can't give youㅡ"

Jongdae's eyes widen at the realization of what Baekhyun is implying.

"No, no." Jongdae rushes to shake his head. "I don't do this because I want you to feel guilty or forced or because I want something in return." Jongdae moves closer, one hand unconsciously moving to place itself over Baekhyun's knees. "I'm doing this because you are important to me and Iㅡ" He's interrupted by the sudden shrilling noise of the doorbell, ringing. Jongdae blinks, turns around for a second and decides to ignore it. "I really loㅡ" the bell rings again. "Who the fuckㅡ" He groans, jumping up the couch and angrily heading to the door to tell whoever it is outside to kindly fuck off. He was about to make a heartfelt confession. 

Baekhyun follows him closely, lowkey feeling relieved. He doesn't think he would've been ready to hear what Jongdae wanted to say and it would have been very awkward, having to reject Jongdae after a serious talk.

Jongdae pulls the door open, his annoyance pretty clear on his face when their friends' faces show up. Sehun, Minseok and Junmyeon are standing there, packs of beer, take out and all kinds of junk food on their hands.

"You idiots have a terrible fucking timing." Jongdae grumbles.

"Hello to you too." Sehun says with a deep frown on his face.

"Uh... what are you guys doing here?" Baekhyun asks, peeking over Jongdae's shoulder.

"Can't we visit our friend?" Minseok grins. "What are  _ you _ doing here?" He asks Jongdae. 

"Something came up." Jongdae answers, still sounding annoyed.

Junmyeon glances at him, then at Baekhyun and a small sigh abandons his lips.

"Actually," he says later "we do have a reason to visit." Junmyeon continues as they step aside, another person appearing behind them.

"Surprise!" The tall guy's grin is wider than ever as he marches inside the apartment, with his arms open and passing by Jongdae, straight to Baekhyun.

Baekhyun remains there, frozen and in shock as Chanyeol presses him tight against his body, eyes wide and limbs unresponsive. His head blank and unable to process what is happening.

"If you don't return the hug, I will think you didn't miss me at all." Chanyeol speaks, close to his ear, making Baekhyun shiver, but that helps his body react and he wraps his arms around Chanyeol on the most awkward hug ever.

But if Baekhyun is honest with himself, it's only awkward for him. Chanyeol seems to be enjoying it.

"I'm sorry, Iㅡ I'm justㅡ I mean, you're here."

"Well, yeah." Chanyeol pulls away.

"H-how?" Baekhyun blinks, still confused.

"I called Junmyeon and I told him I wanted it to be a surprise for you. I didn't have a single day off during these three years so I could have a two months vacations' period. I'll be staying for Christmas!" Chanyeol chirps, smile widening. "I missed you." He says, pulling Baekhyun on another hug.

"I-I missed you too." Baekhyun returns the hug easier now, but his stomach and his heart are still at war inside him.

"By the way, you have a lot to explain." Chanyeol pulls away again and now, the smile is gone, replaced by a frown. "Why did you stop calling? I mean, whenever I tried to call you, you wouldn't answer. I came to think you didn't want anything to do with me anymore."

"Oh, Iㅡ"

Jongdae interrupts the moment, by clearing his throat.

"We're all still here." He sounds bitter, but at this point, he doesn't really care.

"Sure, I missed you too, man." Chanyeol pats his shoulder and walks further inside the apartment.

Baekhyun gives Jongdae a worried look before following.

"Sorry we showed up without calling first." Minseok apologises as they settle in the living room with all the food they brought. "Chanyeol threatened us."

"Yeah. Is Daehyunee asleep? We promise not to make too much noise." Sehun adds.

Baekhyun's breath hitches at the mention of his son.

"Daehyunee?" Chanyeol asks, lifting an amused eyebrow as he looks between Baekhyun and Jongdae. "Did you get him a puppy?" He asks Jongdae, curious about the names combination. "That's a strange name for a dog."

"He's not a dog." Jongdae grumbles. "He'sㅡ"

"He's my son." Baekhyun finishes Jongdae's sentence.

Chanyeol pales, the color draining off of his face as he stares at Baekhyun in disbelief. Did he hear it right? Baekhyun? A son? Withㅡ

"Are youㅡ?" He turns to Jongdae, eyes wide in terror.

"Iㅡ"

"No." Baekhyun replies, voice stern and calm.

"I don't understand." Chanyeol shakes his head, a nervous smile spreading on his lips as he takes a step closer to Baekhyun. "A son? Were you... pregnant?" He asks in a whisper.

"Yeah, I was..." Baekhyun sighs. Chanyeol visibly swallows. 

"Why didn't youㅡ" Chanyeol stops himself from talking, he then lets out a small, bitter laugh. "I see. It makes sense now... why you didn't want to video call with me. Butㅡ"

"Chanyeol." Baekhyun speaks with a pleading tone, closing his eyes. He knows that if Chanyeol keeps digging, he'll find what Baekhyun fears the most.

"Is there something you're not telling me?"

"I think that's enough questioning." Jongdae butts in, coming to stand next to Baekhyun. 

"Cut it out Jongdae. Stop acting like his knight in shining armor and mind your own business." Chanyeol grumbles at him, eyes glaring and brows furrowed deeply together. "If you're not hiding anything from me, then you shouldn't have any problem telling me who the father is." Chanyeol crosses his arms against his chest and waits.

"Why should I? You weren't here." Baekhyun grits his teeth.

Chanyeol's jaw tenses.

"Uh, guys..." Minseok speaks, cutting off the heavy tension in the air "I think we should... give them some privacy?"

"I'm not going anywhere." Jongdae refuses.

"Let's go, Dae." Junmyeon places a hand on his shoulder and pulls a little.

"I said I'm notㅡ"

"It's okay, Jongdae." Baekhyun says then, his eyes tightly locked with Chanyeol's. "I think we do have a lot to talk about."

"Are you sure?"

"Just... get out, Jongdae." Chanyeol spits out.

"Come on." Junmyeon grabs him by the arm and drags him along with him, out of the apartment.

"Well?" Chanyeol says, once they're alone.

"What do you want, Chanyeol?"

"I want the truth."

"And according to you, what truth is that?" Baekhyun quirks an eyebrow.

"Do you really think I'm stupid?" Chanyeol laughs. "Basic math, Baek. You stopped calling four, five months after I left. The exact time for you to start showing and as far as I know, after Jongdae's party, I was the only one youㅡ"

"Stop." Baekhyun grunts.

"Are you going to deny it?" Chanyeol steps closer. "That kid is mine, isn't he?" 

Baekhyun doesn't answer, he doesn't have the words to do so. He looks down, biting his lower lip hard. The silence is enough of an answer for Chanyeol.

Chanyeol opens his mouth, unable to process the silence. There's a lot of jumbled words in his head, a lot of things he wants to say, but he doesn't know where or how to start.

He sits down on the couch, stunned and with a lump forming in his throat.

"You were leaving, I didn't want to ruin that opportunity for you. You always told us you didn't like kids, you were very fucking clear about it. I assumedㅡ"

"You  _ assumed _ ?" Chanyeol jumps up, hands balled up on his sides, anger printed on his voice. "Who gave you the right to fucking assume?!"

"Would you have stayed?!" Baekhyun yells back. "If I had told you, would you have stayed?"

"I don't know, Baekhyun! You never gave me the fucking chance to  _ decide _ !"

"Please, Chanyeol, we both know you wouldn't have."

"That's how you think of me? That I'm just some heartless piece of trash?"

"I never said that."

"No, you didn't have to. It's clear that's what you think of me." Chanyeol snorts.

"That's not fair. I justㅡ"

"Not fair?" Chanyeol asks, he wants to laugh, he wants to cry, he wants to fucking scream and pull his hair out of frustration. "You decided to hide from me the fact that you were pregnant with  _ my _ child and then keep hiding it for 4 years." He speaks, calmer now, falling back down on the couch. 

"I didn't want you to feel forced to stay. I didn't want you to resent me." Baekhyun mumbles, sitting next to him.

"You could have talked to me. We could have found a way to make this work. You thought I was going to reject you and our child because  _ I don't like kids _ ?" Baekhyun nods.

"Sounds stupid when you say it like that."

"I'm starting to think you never really knew me."

"I was scared."

"And I had the right to know." 

"I know."

"It really hurts, to know you didn't have faith in me." Chanyeol mumbles, leaning over his knees, eyes fixed on the floor.

He can feel Baekhyun's presence, hovering next to him and it's suffocating. 

"I'm sorry." Baekhyun's voice quivers.

Silence fills the room for a few seconds. Chanyeol processing all the new information and Baekhyun with so many mixed feelings, it hurts.

"I want to see him." 

"I don't thinkㅡ"

"You've been hiding him from me all this time. I have the right to see him."

"Right?" Baekhyun raises his brows. "I have been his only dad all these years. If it wasn't for Jongdaeㅡ"

Chanyeol's eyes open impossibly wide at the mention of the man.

Baekhyun shuts his mouth and flinches back.

"I could have been his dad too, if you had given me the chance. You decided that I wasn't good enough."

"That's not true." 

"Let me see him, then. I want to meet him." 

"He's sleeping. Heㅡ"

"Daddy?" 

Baekhyun's heart drops to his stomach. He turns around at the same time Chanyeol does; Daehyun is standing in the hall, rubbing his right eye with the back of his hand while he holds his dinosaur with his other arm.

Chanyeol feels his stomach flipping at the sound of the small voice and the sight of the tiny person standing there, looking sleepy and a little confused.

"Baby." Baekhyun rushes to pick him up. "What are you doing up?"

"You were yelling." Daehyun leans his head on his shoulder.

"I'm sorry. Daddy didn't want to wake you up." Baekhyun says, moving to sit on the couch and looking at Chanyeol for him to do the same. Well, there's no point in hiding anymore.

Chanyeol does, rushing and almost tripping with his own feet. He sits down, back straight and shoulders tensed as he looks at the two of them with expectant eyes. 

"Daehyunee." Baekhyun speaks gently, prodding the boy a little to make him raise his head. "Remember when you asked me why your friend Sun had a mommy and a daddy and you didn't?" Daehyun nods his head. "Remember what I told you?" 

"You told me Daehyunee has not another daddy, but I have a lot of people who loves me." The boy replies, fidgeting with the soft paws of his toy.

"Well, daddy didn't tell you the truth, baby. You… do have another daddy."

"I do?" Daehyun looks at him with confused eyes.

"Yes. Daddy is sorry for lying to you. Do youㅡ would you like to meet him?"

Daehyun nods his head so eagerly and so fast, it makes Baekhyun's heart hurt.

"Daehyunee." Chanyeol speaks after a long moment of silence, his voice breaking at the end. It feels strange, to be speaking his son's name for the first time.

Daehyun turns around, finally meeting eyes with his dad.

Chanyeol's breath caughts in his throat and this time, he can't stop the tears from falling. Daehyun is the exact combination of them both.

Those are definitely his eyes.

"Daehyunee." Chanyeol says again, shifting closer to Baekhyun and his son. "Hello, my name is Chanyeol." The boy shyly waves his hand at him, recoiling into his daddy's chest. Chanyeol reaches his hand out for him.

"Daddy?" Daehyun mumbles, lifting his head a little, as if asking for approval.

"It's okay, baby." Baekhyun encourages him.

Daehyun nods once and then slowly moves to place his hand over Chanyeol's.

Chanyeol's heart skips a beat, his fingers curling around his son's tiny hand. A lopsided smile curls up on his lips when Daehyun tentatively tries to also wrap his small fingers around Chanyeol's large hand.

"Chanㅡ Chanyiㅡ" Daehyun tries to pronounce the name, frowning when he realizes it's harder than he thought. 

Chanyeol laughs a little, squeezing Daehyun's hand and letting the tears run freely down his cheeks.

Baekhyun stares at the scene with a lump in his throat and a nagging feeling in his stomach. Did he really make a mistake by hiding Daehyun from Chanyeol all this time? Would things have been different if he had been brave enough to speak out?

Maybe he did. Maybe he denied his son Chanyeol's unconditional love. Maybe he judged too fast. Maybe he didn't really know Chanyeol after all.

Daehyun slowly and unconsciously leans in towards Chanyeol, releasing his hand for a moment just to wrap it again around his fingers, curiously tilting his head to the side as he looks down and squeezes.

"They are big." Daehyun says, frowning. "My daddy's are small."

Chanyeol laughs again, louder this time and as much as Baekhyun tries to hold back, he fails and laughs as well.

"Well, uh... yeah." 

"Chanyielㅡ" Daehyun tries with the name again.

"You can call me Yeol." Chanyeol smiles, deciding to make it easy for his son. 

"Yeol!" Daehyun chirps, a gummy, almost toothless smile curling up his face.

"Yeah, that's right." Chanyeol mumbles, fondly smiling at the boy and thumb rubbing over his knuckles.

A moment of silence fills the room. Chanyeol can't keep his eyes off of his son's face, still amazed at how much he looks like them; especially himself, there's no way of denying Daehyun is his son.

Baekhyun lets out a small sigh, closing his eyes as he comes to a definitive conclusion.

He's going to let Chanyeol be Daehyun's father. Whatever that brings them in the future.

"So you like dinosaurs?" Chanyeol's voice catches his attention.

He sees Daehyun offering his stuffed toy, showing it to Chanyeol. Daehyun never does such a thing.

The boy shakes his head. "Dragons."

"But this is aㅡ"

Baekhyun's eyes widen in horror, he shakes his head furiously at the same time he waves his hands around, looking down at the toy and then back up at Chanyeol. 

Chanyeol understands what Baekhyun is trying to say and snickers.

"So a dragon. What's his name?" 

"It's a girl." Daehyun pouts.

"A girl, huh." Chanyeol looks up at Baekhyun, questioningly, and he just shrugs. "What's her name, then?" 

"I call her Min." Daehyun takes his toy back. "But my friend Sun says she doesn't look like a Min."

"If you like the name, you should keep it, right?" Chanyeol asks. Daehyun nods.

"Daehyun, baby, it's time to go back to bed." Baekhyun gently taps his shoulder.

"But daddy... Yeolㅡ"

"Your daddy's right. It's late." Daehyun pouts. "What about I come to visit you tomorrow? Would you like that?"

"Yes!" Daehyun exclaims, clapping his little hands.

"Alright then. We can go somewhere together."

"Ice cream!"

"Anything you want." Chanyeol smiles as he stands up. Baekhyun does the same with the boy in his arms. 

He follows Chanyeol to the entrance and stops when the taller does too, before opening the door.

"I'm sorry, again." Baekhyun mumbles.

Chanyeol shakes his head. "We'll talk a little more later." He says, placing his hand over the knob.

"Yeah." Baekhyun breathes out. Then, Chanyeol is gone.

Baekhyun takes Daehyun back to his room and gets him into bed, helping him get comfortable by securing his blanket around him.

"Daddy."

"Hmm." Baekhyun hums. "Is Yeol my daddy too?"

"Well, uh… yes, baby. He is. Would you like to spend more time with him?" Daehyun nods. "You will, then."

"Can I call him daddy too?"

"Why don't you ask him tomorrow?"

Daehyun nods again. Baekhyun smiles and leans in to press a kiss on his son's forehead.

"Alright then. Good night, baby."

"Night-night, daddy." Daehyun mumbles as he rolls over to his side.

Baekhyun leaves the room with mixed feelings still present in his heart, but who is him to deny his son the chance to have a complete family? Be truly happy. 

He still doesn't know where he and Chanyeol stand, but Baekhyun supposes he'll have the time to figure that out later. 


	5. Chapter 5

When Chanyeol landed in Korea earlier that day, all he could think about was to give Baekhyun a big surprise. He never imagined it was going to be the other way around.

Chanyeol wanted to tell him about his job, all the new people he's met, all the new things he's learnt, all the great things he's accomplished in those four years. He wanted Baekhyun to be proud of him.

But a son? That, he never expected it.

There are no words for him to express what he's feeling. Hell, he doesn't even /know/ what he's feeling.

His heart hasn't stopped beating erratically ever since he left Baekhyun's place and his head is a mess. Chanyeol is in shock and at the same time, there's certain warmth enveloping his body.

If he's being honest, he never saw himself as a father; the thought never crossed his mind and just like Baekhyun had said, he's never been a great fan of kids.

But how does Chanyeol explain to himself the way his chest swelled with an irrational and inexplicable feeling of adoration as soon as that boy met eyes with him? Or the immense urge to cry when Daehyun said ㅡtried to, at leastㅡ his name? Is that even normal?

Chanyeol never knew of his existence and yet, he did know, from the moment he saw him, that that boy was his flesh and blood. His son.

How can someone so small change an entire mindset within just a few seconds? Yesterday, being a parent wasn't in his life plans. Not even close. And now, he  _ wants _ to be Daehyun's father. Chanyeol wants to know what he likes and what he doesn't, his favorite color, his favorite food, does he like sweets? Does he eat his vegetables? He wants to hear Daehyun calling him  _ dad _ ... the mere thought makes his heart beat so fast it almost hurts.

The anticipation for tomorrow pulses in his veins, he can't wait to take his son out and do all the things they couldn't do these past few years.

Maybe they couldㅡ

"Finally! What took you so long?" 

Chanyeol turns around so fast, he almost tangles himself with his own feet. The very familiar voice sounds so foreign and so strange in the silence of his old apartment.

Jongin stands by the hallway, arms crossed against his chest and a small frown on his face.

"Jongin." Chanyeol mumbles. "W-what are you doing here?" 

Jongin rolls his eyes, but there's a smile on his face. He then sighs and slowly approaches Chanyeol.

"I told you I was arriving tonight, remember?"

"Oh... yeah. Yes." Chanyeol lies, he had totally forgotten.

Jongin narrows his eyes. "You forgot, didn't you?" Chanyeol gives him an apologetic smile. Jongin chuckles. "It's okay. I'm here." He says as his arms wrap around Chanyeol's neck.

"How did you get in?" Chanyeol asks, hands placing themselves on Jongin's hips out of habit.

"You told me once you use the same number combination for everything. You know, the 060592? I figured I could try my luck here as well and it did work."

"Oh, r-right." Chanyeol laughs nervously.

"Is everything okay? You look on edge." Jongin asks, his expression instantly changing to a worried one.

Chanyeol hesitates for a moment, lower lip trapped in between his teeth and hands curling around the fabric of his boyfriend's loose shirt. He then lets out a long sigh and lets go of Jongin.

"Yeol." Jongin calls his name as Chanyeol moves to sit on the couch.

"Jongin, we need to talk." 

Chanyeol pats the space next to him. Jongin eyes the place where his hand is and then looks at him again; Chanyeol knows his boyfriend, he can see in his eyes the fear and the doubt.

"What's going on?"

"Listen, Nini, you know I love you and because I love you, I think you deserve to know the truth."

"What are you talking about? You're kind of freaking me out." A nervous smile takes over his face.

"It came as a surprise for me too, but I intend to get involved."

"I'm afraid I don't understand, Chanyeol." Jongin frowns. "Get involved? On what?"

"I'll understand if after this you don't want to stay with meㅡ"

"Just! Say it!" Jongin's usually calm demeanor suddenly bursts.

Chanyeol lets out a long sigh, closes his eyes and then, he says it. "I have a son."

Jongin blinks as he stares at Chanyeol, shocked and in disbelief. He doesn't know what to say and even if he did, Jongin is sure he wouldn't find the voice to speak out.

His head is suddenly a confused mess.

"A-a son?" He stutters. Chanyeol silently nods. "You're joking, right?"

A small frown appears on Chanyeol's face at the implication. "I would never joke about something like this."

Jongin then gets up on his feet and walks towards the windows, looking down on the street while he tries to process the recently acquired information.

"With who?" 

He asks after a few seconds of silence. 

Chanyeol lets out a long sigh. He has told Jongin a lot about Baekhyun in the past and he has never shown any sign of dislike, maybe some disinterest, but never a negative reaction. Plus, Chanyeol doesn't lie. He prefers to come all clean once and for all and avoid any misunderstandings.

"You remember Baekhyun?" Chanyeol asks.

Jongin slowly turns around to face him. "You friend Baekhyun? The same Baekhyun you never shut up about?" 

Chanyeol rolls his eyes. "Yeah, that Baekhyun." Jongin then nods. "Well, a few weeks before I left, he and I had... a little affair. We were drunk and well, you know how it goes. The thing is, he hid it from me all this time."

"So, you didn't know." Jongin's shoulders visibly relax. 

Chanyeol shakes his head. "I just found out about it a couple of hours ago."

"Why did he hide it from you?" He asks as he gets closer to Chanyeol again. "That's not something you just...  _ hide _ ."

"We still need to have a proper conversation, but... Nini, you have no idea of what I felt when I saw him." Chanyeol says, a wide grin on his face as he places his hands over his boyfriend's shoulders. "He's the cutest little boy ever."

Jongin smiles as well, impossible for him to hold back when Chanyeol seems to have stars in his eyes.

"What's his name?"

At that, Chanyeol grimaces, huffing as he rolls his eyes. "Daehyun. I can't say I'm thrilled about the name, but I'll get used to it."

"Why? It's a pretty name." Jongin quirks an eyebrow.

"Long story. We'll talk about that later. The thing is," Chanyeol plops down on the couch, Jongin quickly follows "I never imagined myself as a father. I mean, I never even liked the idea of kids, but with Daehyun is different. He does  _ things _ to my heart and I want to be his father more than anything else." He glances at his boyfriend. "I'm telling you this because I don't want you to feel forced to stay with me after this. I would understand if youㅡ"

Jongin shakes his head. "Don't be an idiot, Park. I love you and if that boy makes you happy, then I'm happy too. We're both adults and we can make things work, right?"

"Right." Chanyeol smiles. "So... you're okay with me being someone else's daddy?" He wriggles his eyebrows.

Jongin scrunches his nose in disgust. "Gross."

Chanyeol laughs loudly. "Seriously, though, are you okay with this?"

"I already told you. Besides, I like it when you smile like that." 

"You're the best." Chanyeol grins, pulling Jongin in for a kiss.

🔸

"So he saw him?" Jongdae asks, stopping his pacing around the living room. "Chanyeol saw Dae?"

Baekhyun sighs and nods. "We were yelling and he woke up. I couldn't stop it."

"Damn it, Baek. Did he do something to him? Iㅡ"

"What? No, no." Baekhyun quickly shakes his head. "It was... all the opposite, actually." Baekhyun says as he drinks a sip of his beer. "He... cried. He said he wants to be Dae's dad."

Jongdae scoffs. "Seriously? Be his father for two months and then leave and never come back again?" 

Baekhyun stays silent at that. He hadn't thought about it like that.

"He said he wants to be here for him. He'll be coming tomorrow."

"Chanyeol's just going to hurt you both. When he leaves, what are you going to tell Daehyun if he gets too attached?" Baekhyun stays silent again. "He should have never come back. You should have never let him see himㅡ"

"I don't think that's a decision for you to make." Baekhyun cuts him off with a dry tone. "Chanyeol is his father and you may be right, but I'm not going to deny my son the chance to meet him."

"That's notㅡ"

"Besides, I don't even want to think about what could happen if I deny Chanyeol his right. I don't want to lose my baby." A shiver runs down Baekhyun's spine.

"Do you think he couldㅡ"

"I don't know, but I don't want to find out either." Baekhyun sighs.

"I just want to know you are completely sure about this." 

"I am." Baekhyun nods, determined. "All I want to see my baby happy and... you should have seen him, he let Chanyeol hold Min."

"What? But he has neverㅡ"

"Exactly. I don't know, Dae, maybe this could be a good thing." Baekhyun shrugs.

Or so he hopes. 

🔹 

Baekhyun groans, looking up at the clock hanging from his kitchen wall when he hears the soft knocks on the door. It's 8 in the morning, on a Saturday... he shouldn't even be awake. Daehyun shouldn't even be awake, but the boy had rushed in his bedroom at 6:47, jumping around, pulling on his blankets and demanding him to wake up so they could have breakfast and be ready on time for when  _ Yeol _ arrives.

Baekhyun had never seen his son so excited before; not even that time they watched his first Harry Potter movie.

He drags his feet to the door and pulls it open. Chanyeol is standing there, looking so fresh and happy to be true, smiling widely and radiating an special glow Baekhyun certainly envies.

"You're early." Baekhyun says, moving aside to let him in.

"Honestly? I barely had any sleep. I was too anxious." Chanyeol explains as he looks around the apartment. "Is Daehyunee up?"

Baekhyun scoffs. "He's been up since who knows what ungodly hour. He's excited too and having breakfast in the kitchen." He says, leading the taller man through the living room, even when he knows he doesn't need it. Chanyeol has been in this apartment countless of times before.

"Good morning." Chanyeol greets as soon as he steps in the kitchen. Daehyun immediately looks up from his plate of scrambled eggs and his face lights up so brightly, it melts Baekhyun to the point of almost wanting to just lie on the floor and squeal.

"Yeol!" The boy exclaims, attempting to jump down his chair.

"Ah, ah." Baekhyun stops him. "Finish your breakfast first, baby. Did you eat before coming here? Want some coffee?" He asks Chanyeol.

Daehyun pouts, his bright expression dampening a little, but still doing what he's told. 

"I did, but coffee would be nice." Chanyeol nods. "I'll wait for you, okay?" He tells his son as he stirs the sugar in his coffee.

Daehyun nods eagerly and continues to eat his food.

"Baekhyun." He calls a moment later, as Baekhyun moves around the kitchen, cleaning up the dishes he used for breakfast. "Thank you, for letting me do this." Chanyeol continues when Baekhyun stops moving around.

"You were right. I admit that what I did was wrong. You deserve the truth and so did Daehyun. He might be a kid, but he's smarter than we think. Don't freak out if he asks you... things later."

Chanyeol frowns at that. "What kind of things?"

Baekhyun glances at his son, who's munching on a mouthful of eggs and smiles. "You'll see."

Chanyeol opens his mouth to protest, but he's interrupted by the loud screeching of the chair on the floor as Daehyun pushes it back so he can get up with his empty plate on his hands.

Baekhyun chuckles, picking his son up so he can leave his plate on the sink.

"Time to brush your teeth." Baekhyun tells him, kissing his cheek before putting him back down on the floor.

"Can Yeol help me?" Daehyun asks, looking up at his dad and then at Chanyeol.

"Why don't you ask him?" Baekhyun tells him, a little teasing tone at Chanyeol's awestruck expression.

"Do you want to help me?" Daehyun asks him this time, pulling at the fabric of his pants.

"Oh, uh… I've neverㅡ"

"You just have to make sure he doesn't make a mess with the toothpaste. He does all the work." Baekhyun grins as he starts with the dishes.

"O-okay." Chanyeol nods. Daehyun smiles, grabbing him by the tip of the one finger he can reach and dragging him to the bathroom.

Baekhyun chuckles, Chanyeol as a father will be a sight to behold. 

A few minutes later they come back, Daehyun has his backpack already hanging from his shoulders, carrying a change of clothes, some toys, his favorite bottle of water with the shape of an owl and the emergency phone Baekhyun keeps with his son all the time for emergencies. 

"I think we're leaving now." Chanyeol shrugs, seeing how impatiently Daehyun is jumping up and down next to him. "Anything I need to know? Something he can't eat?" 

"He's not picky, but he is allergic to peanuts. He eats almost everything, just don't give him too much sugar, he gets impossible. Also, he's afraid of clowns." Baekhyun continues as he dries his hands with a towel. "Don't take him near one, real or not; once he starts crying you won't be able to stop him." Chanyeol nods. "The phone he has is for emergencies only. He has a few games there but he knows he has a schedule for it, don't let him play for more than an hour if he asks you to."

"Got it. Anything else?"

"Just... have fun." Baekhyun finishes with a smile.

"I'm going to take care of him, don't worry. I'll call you when we get back home."

Baekhyun nods. He manages to kiss his son goodbye before he rushes out of the apartment with a laughing Chanyeol trailing closely behind him.

It doesn't hurt as much as he thought it would; he knows Chanyeol is going to take good care of him. 


	6. Chapter 6

"Alright, there you go." Chanyeol smiles at his son as he finishes securing him up on the backseat of his car. Daehyun gives him a wide grin, hugging his dinosaur ㅡdragonㅡ against his chest while Chanyeol goes around the car and to the driver seat. He's excited, probably even more than the boy himself.

"What do you want to do today?" Chanyeol asks once he's inside the car, already pulling out of the building's parking lot.

"Ice cream!" Daehyun chirps, kicking his short legs up and down the seat.

Chanyeol chuckles. "It's too early for ice cream. Maybe we can do something else while we wait?" 

"Sometimes daddy takes me to the puppy shelㅡ shelㅡ"

"The shelter?"

"Yes!" Daehyun nods eagerly. "He takes me there. Daddy says that if I'm a good boy I can have a puppy someday."

"Should we go there first?" 

"Yes! And the park! And the  _ aquarum _ !"

"The aquarium?" Chanyeol raises an amused eyebrow.

"Yes, the  _ aquarum _ ." Daehyun purses his lips, knowing the pronunciation is wrong, but not being able to say it right. He'll have to practice on it.

"We'll do anything you want today." Chanyeol looks at him through the rearview mirror.

"Really?" 

"Really." Chanyeol replies with a big smile, eyes glancing back for a second to see his son mumbling nonsense to his stuffed toy. His heart jumps.

Their first stop is the shelter. Daehyun waddles around the place, looking in complete awe at every pet on display. 

This is easy, Chanyeol thinks, until Daehyun finds a litter of corgi puppies up for adoption and the girl in charge of the store lets him carry and play with one for a few minutes.

It breaks Chanyeol's heart having to leave the shelter with Daehyun sobbing on his shoulder. He promises him that later, they can bring daddy Baekhyun with them and convince him to adopt a puppy. Chanyeol figures that, not even with years of experience, Baekhyun can resist his son's large puppy eyes.

Their second stop is the aquarium. By then, Daehyun is calmer and he drags Chanyeol around the place, his tiny hand tightly wrapped around his finger while he points out and names all the fish he can remember from one of his classes.

At one point, they come across a tank full of royal blue tang fishes and Daehyun spends a good three minutes trying to remember the name, until he ends up yelling "Dory!" And then pulling Chanyeol to where the dolphins are.

If Chanyeol is honest, he's never had this much fun before. Daehyun is a quirky boy, loud and cheerful. He likes to jump around and gets easily excited... which reminds him a lot of Baekhyun, back when they were still in college and the guy couldn't stay still in one place for long.

Daehyun is also smart. Smarter than the kids his age (he got that from him). He speaks clearer than any four year old he's ever met and that amazes Chanyeol a lot. 

"Daehyunee, wait!" Chanyeol exclaims while trailing behind his son as the boy runs to the gift shop.

Baekhyun is probably going to kill him, but he can't take it anymore and ends up buying the boy a colorful guppy fish, a fish bowl and a few packets of fish food. Spoiling his son is not something he gets to do every day, but it is something he hopes he'll get to do more in the future.

Their third stop is the park and the ice cream shop. Chanyeol can't stop giggling at how his son chats with his new pet on the way there. Telling him everything and nothing at the same time. It's /adorable/, he thinks for the nth time.

At the ice cream shop, Daehyun asks for a "shizhcake" cone, claiming it's his daddy's favorite and also his. Strange pick for a kid, but Chanyeol shrugs it off and asks for double chocolate for himself. 

After getting their ice creams, Chanyeol takes Daehyun to the playground area, where the boy runs and jumps around, pointing at one of the empty swings for Chanyeol to help him up. 

Kicking his short legs, Daehyun manages to swing himself a little. Chanyeol chuckles then, eating what's left of his ice cream to help his son with the swing.

Daehyun giggles, hands tightly wrapped around the chains.

"Faster!" Daehyun screams and Chanyeol complies, even just a little.

The smile never leaves his face while he pushes his son and hears him squeal and scream; laugh and kick his legs around in the air. Chanyeol thinks he could easily get used to this. To being a father...  _ Daehyun's _ father.

By around five in the afternoon, the playgrounds are almost empty, there are only a few older kids running around the fields kicking a ball among each other.

Daehyun sits at the top of the slide and stays there as Chanyeol comes to stand close to him, supporting his arms over the metal of the structure, his chin almost resting over Daehyun's thigh. He thinks it's the perfect time to get to know his son a little better.

"Daehyunee," Chanyeol speaks softly. The boy turns to look at him "are you having fun?" Daehyun nods. "Did you like going out with me?" Daehyun nods again, faster this time.

"I don't come to the park with daddy that much." Daehyun says as he looks down, pulling on the denim of his pants.

"Why not?" Chanyeol asks, genuinely curious.

"He has to work."

"I see... well, I can bring you any time you want."

"Really?" Daehyun perks his head up.

"Really. You just have to ask your daddy to call me and I'll pick you up."

"Okay." Daehyun giggles.

"So... tell me, baby," Chanyeol speaks again after a moment of silence "what's your favorite color?"

"Purple!" Daehyun exclaims, giving him a proud smile.

"And your favorite animal?"

"I like tigers." 

"Why?" Chanyeol asks, amused.

"They're big and strong. I want to be big and strong. They are cute too."

"You're cute." Chanyeol grunts, pinching the boy's nose between his fingers, causing him to scrunch his nose up.

"Uncle Dae says I'm cute and smart."

At the mention of the name, Chanyeol's smile falters a little. He uncomfortably clears his throat. He knows Daehyun means nothing by bringing Jongdae up; if anything, he understands... Jongdae has been a constant in his son's life. He hasn't.

"You like your uncle Dae?"

"Yes." Daehyun bobs his head up and down. 

"How much do you like him?"

"This much." Daehyun answers by opening his arms and stretching them as wide as he can. Chanyeol swallows, he knows he shouldn't feel like this, Daehyun is just a kid, he grows attached easily, but it still hurts him.

"Has he been nice to you and your daddy?" Chanyeol moves his hand up a little and lets his son play with his fingers.

"Yes. He takes care of us." Daehyun flips his hand over and begins to trace slow lines with his finger.

"Daehyunee." He calls and the boy looks up, tilting his head to the side curiously, probably for the sudden change in his voice. "Do you know who I am?" Chanyeol asks slowly.

Daehyun hesitantly nods his head. "Daddy says you are my daddy too." He mumbles.

"Yes." Chanyeol swallows back the knot in his throat. "I'm your dad and I'm really sorry for not being there for you all this time. But I'm here now and if you want me to be part of your life and take care of you too, I will beㅡ"

"Yes!" Daehyun exclaims before he can finish his sentence, his hand wrapping around his finger. "I want you to be my daddy." 

"Okay, alright." Chanyeol smiles, not being able to hold back and letting a single tear roll down his cheek.

"Can I call you daddy?"

"Well, I think that's going to be a little confusing for your daddy Baekhyun."

"Appa."

"Yes, that's okay too." Chanyeol smiles widely, taking his son's hand to kiss it. "We should go home, your daddy must be wondering why we haven't called him." Daehyun complains, shaking his head and refusing to go down the slide. "We can come another day and bring Baekhyun."

"Okay." Daehyun pouts, offering his arms to his dad.

Chanyeol picks him up and carries him back to the car.

By the time they arrive to Chanyeol's apartment, the sun is already going down and Daehyun is fast asleep in the backseat.

He carries his sleeping son up to his apartment and to his bedroom, putting him down on his bed and surrounding him with pillows to avoid an accident.

"Hey." Chanyeol mumbles on the phone once he's out of the room.

" _ Finally, how did it go _ ?" Baekhyun says on the other side.

"Pretty good. He fell asleep on the way home."

" _ Alright, then. I'll be there in about... 30 minutes. _ " Baekhyun announces.

"Yeah, you can come up, you know the way." 

" _ Sure, I'll see you in a bit. _ " Baekhyun says and before Chanyeol can say anything else, the call has ended.

Chanyeol sighs, walking towards the living room where Jongin is sitting, furiously typing on his phone. He's probably arguing with his manager, he has that same face he does whenever he argues with the man.

Chanyeol slumps down on the couch next to him and instantly, all of Jongin's attention is on him.

"Tired?"

"Not really, just... a little emotional?" Chanyeol shrugs. "We had such a good time, but just knowing how used to he is to Jongdae, I want to punch someone." He growls, a frown appearing on his face.

"Well, you have to understand he's being with him since the beginning." Jongin speaks lowly, hand resting over Chanyeol's forearm. "You have to give him time, he'll warm up to you in a blink. You're his dad, after all."

Chanyeol hums. "He agreed to call me appa." He smiles.

Jongin grins widely. "See? There's no way he's not going to love you."

"You really think so?"

"Absolutely. What's there not to love about you?"

"I know." Chanyeol chuckles. "But honestly, I hope you're right."

"Everything's going to be fine. But, Yeol... after these two months..."

Chanyeol shakes his head. "I don't want to think about it right now, I'll figure out what to do later."

"Alrightㅡ" Jongin's interrupted by the loud buzzing of his phone. He takes the device and looks at the screen. Groaning, he stands up. "I swear this man is going to kill me one of these days." He grumbles, heading out to the balcony to attend the call.

Chanyeol snickers, picking up his own phone to find a text from Baekhyun saying he'll be there in ten more minutes. 

The text is from 12 minutes ago. Chanyeol sighs, getting on his feet to stretch his arms and crack his neck, finishing just in time for the knocks on the door to be heard.

He unconsciously fixes his clothes and rushes towards the door, pulling it open and welcoming Baekhyun with a smile.

"I hope he didn't give you any trouble." It's the first thing Baekhyun says as he walks inside.

"Not at all." Chanyeol shakes his head. "He's a really good kid."

"Yeah, Dae isㅡ"

"ㅡhyun."

"Uh?" Baekhyun frowns, confused.

"I mean, his name is Dae _ hyun _ , right?" 

"Oh, yeah... right." Baekhyun narrows his eyes suspiciously, but he doesn't say anything else as they make their way to the living room. "Well, where is he?"

"In my room, but actually..." Chanyeol glances at the balcony's closed door "I asked you to come up because I want you to meet someone." 

"Someone?" Baekhyun asks carefully, eyes slowly moving around the apartment but finding no one. Still, his stomach churns uncomfortably due the unwanted anticipation, he doesn't have a good feeling about this.

"Yeah, I was supposed to tell you guys about him when I arrived, but obviously you gave me a bigger surprise." Chanyeol lets out a light laugh.

"Chanyeolㅡ" Suddenly Baekhyun finds his voice calling for Chanyeol's name being mixed with a different one, a foreign one.

He turns his head to the balcony to find another man stepping in, slowly closing the doors once he's inside. Baekhyun blinks, breathing racing as the seconds pass.

"Baek, meet Jongin, my boyfriend." Chanyeol says with a smile. "Jongin, this is Baekhyun."

"Oh, hello." Jongin smiles as well, coming to stand next to Chanyeol. "Yeol has told me a lot about you." 

Baekhyun looks down at the hand Jongin is offering him. He suddenly wants to throw up and he forgets how to breathe.

Seeing how Baekhyun is not taking his hand, Jongin puts it down and smiles awkwardly.

Of all things, Baekhyun was not expecting this; his heart is erratically beating inside his chest, missing a few beats.

He never expected things to be perfect: for Chanyeol to come back so they could be the perfect family and live happily ever after, but not _this_. He thoughtㅡ he really thought that Chanyeol maybeㅡ maybe he had come back really for  _ him _ , maybe they could talk and figure things out. Maybe they could be together, raise Daehyun together, watch him grow...

Baekhyun wants to laugh at himself for being so naive; he also wants to cry, a suffocating feeling constricting his chest and his throat.

He looks at Chanyeol, who is widely smiling with a hand on this Jongin person's waist.

"I figured that, if I'm going to do this, I have to do this right. I don't want to keep any secrets from you, Baek." And those words feel like a stab to his stomach. "Especially not the ones that could potentially damage my relationship with you and my son."

_ Relationship _ ... Baekhyun almost laughs right there at how ridiculous the situation is; or more like, how ridiculous  _ he _ is. There's no relationship. There was never one and there's never going to be. 

Baekhyun soon realizes he's been quiet for way too long and staring at Jongin without even blinking, making the situation more uncomfortable than what it should be. Jongin keeps averting his eyes awkwardly.

He clears his throat then and a small, fake smile appears on his face. "I'm sorry." Baekhyun chuckles. "It just took me by surprise, that's all. It's nice to meet you, Jongin." This time, it's him the one offering his hand to the other man.

Jongin takes it without hesitating. Baekhyun can almost see how his shoulders relax and he can feel how the atmosphere slightly shifts to a more acceptable one.

"It's nice to meet you, too. And don't worry, I understand, I told Chanyeol these type of surprises are never good but he insisted. Must have been a pretty big shock."

Baekhyun smiles a little more. "You have no idea." He mumbles.

"He's exaggerating." Chanyeol says, playfully nudging Jongin. Baekhyun tries his hardest to not look away and make it more obvious than what it probably is already. "I just thought it would be a cool surprise."

"It was a surprise, indeed." Baekhyun nods. 

"Yeah, well..."

"I can't wait to meet the rest of you guys." Jongin says and as much as Baekhyun wants to find something to dislike the guy, he doesn't find anything. His smile is sincere, his eyes shine with genuine excitement. He's pretty much perfect and the way he looks at Chanyeol with extreme fondness makes his chest hurt, but Baekhyun knows it wouldn't be fair to start acting like an asshole now.

Chanyeol has done nothing wrong but to find happiness with someone else. He accepted Daehyun right away, something Baekhyun didn't expect to happen so fast and so easily. In all honesty, since Chanyeol came back, he has been nothing but great, making it hard for Baekhyun to feel any kind of resentment towards him. Not that he could, anyway.

"You're going to love them and they're going to love you." Chanyeol assures his boyfriend.

"Yeah, they're pretty great." Baekhyun's lips twist on a smile.

"I'm nervous, though. I was nervous before meeting you too." Jongin confesses. "I mean, you're Chanyeol's best friend and being on the best friend's bad side is never good." He chuckles. "More so if they have a child together. I just don't want to make it awkward."

"Oh, no." Baekhyun rushes to say, shaking his head. "Don't worry about me. Chanyeol's a big guy now, he doesn't need my permission to date." He adds, the teasing tone coming out exactly as he wanted it. 

Chanyeol visibly blushes, lowering his head as he tries to hide the smile on his face. A clear sign that he's embarrassed. Despite everything, Baekhyun smiles in victory, proud of himself for still having that effect on him.

"Anyway." Baekhyun clears his throat. "We should go, I have work tomorrow and Daehyunee has daycare."

"Oh!" Chanyeol perks up at the mention of the boy. "I could take care of him tomorrow, too."

Baekhyun takes a few seconds to answer. "I don't know. I don't want him to get used to missing his classes."

"Oh... right, of course. I don't want to disrupt his life like that. I meanㅡ"

"You can pick him up." Baekhyun blurts out. "He's out by three and usually he spends the rest of the afternoon with his nanny, if you want toㅡ"

"Yes!" Chanyeol exclaims, nodding his head eagerly. 

"Alright," Baekhyun chuckles "I'll give the teachers your name tomorrow. You just have to show your ID."

"Great. Thank you."

"Stop thanking me." Baekhyun rolls his eyes. "He's your son too."

"Yeah, sorry. I meanㅡ yeah uh... I'll go get him, the rest of his stuff are over there on the couch." Chanyeol points at the individual seat across them, where Daehyun's bag is.

Baekhyun gives Jongin a small smile and moves to grab the backpack and sling it over his shoulder.

"Uh..." Jongin speaks "the fish too." He looks down at the coffee table.

Baekhyun follows his gaze down to find a small fishbowl and a plastic bag inside full of water and a small fish swimming in it.

"A fish?" Baekhyun asks, more to himself.

"Ready?" Chanyeol appears again with a still sleeping Daehyun in his arms.

"You got him a fish?" Baekhyun quirks an eyebrow.

"Oh, uh... yes? I couldn't help it." Chanyeol smiles apologetically. "He gave me puppy eyes and Iㅡ"

"You have a lot to learn." Baekhyun sighs, but taking the fishbowl with him anyway.

Chanyeol thinks that yeah, he does, but will he really be able to resist his son someday? That, he can't be sure of.

"It was nice meeting you." He says to Jongin, already out of the apartment.

"Same to you." Jongin grins.

"I'll be back in a moment." Chanyeol tells his boyfriend before closing the door and following Baekhyun down to the parking lot.

There, he fixes Daehyun on his car seat, careful of not wake him up by Baekhyun's suggestion, letting him know how hard it is to get him back to sleep once he's been awaken. 

"So..." Chanyeol starts once the car door is closed "Jongin... what do you think about him?" He asks, shoving his hands inside the pockets of his pants. He's nervous, that much Baekhyun can tell.

"He's nice." Baekhyun shrugs.

"But like... do you like him?"

"Why are you asking me that?" Baekhyun frowns.

"Well, uh... I want to know what you think about him."

"Wait," Baekhyun grins "are you asking for my opinion?" He asks, a little amused. Chanyeol nods. "You've never asked for my opinion about these things before."

"Well,  _ before _ we didn't have a kid together."

"Chanyeol... it's your life, you can do whatever you want." Baekhyun sighs.

"But it's important. I'm going to be a part of Daehyun's life now and Jongin is a part of mine. All I want is for all of us to get along well." 

"And if I said I don't like him?" Baekhyun asks, carefully. "Would you break up with him?" Chanyeol stiffens a little.

"Iㅡ well, Iㅡ"

Baekhyun chuckles. "Relax, Yeol. I would never ask you to choose." He says and surprising even himself, he means it. "And I won't keep you from seeing Daehyun. Besides, Jongin seems like a good person."

"He is. Are you sure you're okay with this?" Chanyeol insists. "Baek, I care about this guy a lot. But if you tell me you're not comfortable with this I can talk to Jongin, I'm sure he'll understand."

Baekhyun finds himself holding his breath for a few seconds, seriously considering changing his mind. Chanyeol is given him the chance, easy like that, on a silver platter, willing to do whatever Baekhyun tells him to do, but... can he really be that selfish? Could he ask this from Chanyeol for his own benefit?

"Are you crazy?" Baekhyun says instead. "Of course not, Chanyeol. Like I said, Jongin seems like a nice person and you love him right?" Chanyeol nods slowly. "I know you love Daehyun too and that you'll never do anything to hurt him."

"Of course not." Chanyeol quickly says.

"So stop beating yourself up about it. All I want is my son to be happy and he seems the happiest when you're around."

The smile on Chanyeol's face is the brightest Baekhyun's ever seen. "Does he?"

Baekhyun hums. "But you really should learn how to say no to him." He looks down at the fishbowl in his arm.

Chanyeol bites his lip. "I'll try, I promise." He says, but he knows he probably won't be able to keep that promise. 

"Thank you. I'll see you tomorrow, then." Baekhyun says while walking towards the driver's side. "Three o'clock, don't forget."

"I won't." Chanyeol bends down to look at Baekhyun through the open window. "Thanks again, Baek."

Baekhyun rolls his eyes. "Yeah, okay." He chuckles, waving Chanyeol goodbye as he drives off.

Baekhyun thinks he might regret his decision later on, but he does know he made the right one. He would never do anything to hurt Chanyeol nor his son, even if it's not the best for  _ him _ . 

🔸

A sense of peace followed after his conversation with Baekhyun. 

Chanyeol had tried to convince himself that it wasn't necessary, that whatever Baekhyun's opinion about Jongin was, he was not going to let that part of his life go and for a while, he had been content with that.

Except that Baekhyun's opinion  _ did _ matter to him and it was a constant nagging in his chest that he needed to solve as soon as possible so he could live in peace. Especially since he knew that just as he had the right to know about Daehyun, Baekhyun had the right to  _ not _ let him see him if he considered his partner inappropriate to be around the boy. Chanyeol had to keep in mind that it wasn't just him and Jongin now, there was Daehyunee as well.

Convincing Jongin that Baekhyun had been totally okay with him being around after the older left had proved to be more difficult than he had thought. Jongin was still insecure about the whole thing, mostly because he didn't want to ruin this for Chanyeol and he had been very vocal about it.

Jongin wanted for Chanyeol to form a bond with his boy. A bond just a child and their parents could have. He was not about to get in the middle.

But after seeing the smile on Chanyeol's face, Jongin felt like he could breathe again and sleep came easier.

Watching Jongin sleep has been one of Chanyeol's favorite things to do ever since the first time they slept together. He always looks so peaceful, pouty lips and soft snores. Chanyeol can't help but smile at it.

He loves Jongin, he'd learn to love him after a little more than a year of relationship. The man is a sweet person, kind, caring and the best Chanyeol's ever had in bed so far.

As he watches him sleep, fingers softly running through his hair, Chanyeol thinks about all the times he's tried to fall in love with him: Jongin deserves no less, but to no avail.

Loving someone is not the same as being in love and Chanyeol is not in love with Jongin; not because he doesn't want to, but because his heart belongs to someone else.

Someone else who'll never see him as anything more than just a best friend.

Ironic, Chanyeol silently chuckles, despite of the strong bond they share now, he holds no hopes of Baekhyun ever feeling the same about him and he's stupid enough to keep holding onto something that he  _ knows _ has no future.

Baekhyun has been there since the beginning, being everything he ever needed and all he's ever wanted, but his heart can take just too much. 

It hurts, knowing they could have had the chance of being together and be a family. Chanyeol would have given up on everything, he would have stayed by Baekhyun's side; he would have taken care of his small family. But instead, he was replaced and if Chanyeol has to be honest, it still irks him to the core the fact that someone else took what should have been his place.

An angry tear rolls down his cheek and Chanyeol is quick to wipe it off with the back of his hand. He's not going to cry now, the past is in the past and there's nothing he can do to change it. Only the future is left and he's planning on making the best of it, for his son's good and his own.

Maybe Baekhyun was never for him. Maybe they were never meant to be together and life proved it to him in a very cruel way and yes, it's going to hurt, having to see him every day, but Chanyeol is willing to let his heart break a little more... all for Daehyun. Their son is all that matters now.

Jongin shifts on his sleep, rolling over and a little closer to Chanyeol. He cracks one eye open and a small, lazy smile curls up on his lips.

"What are you doing awake?" He asks groggily.

"Just thinking." Chanyeol mumbles. "I'm sorry I woke you."

Jongin shakes his head and reaches for him to pull him down onto the mattress. Chanyeol complies and lets himself be wrapped in a snuggly cocoon of warmth and Jongin.

Chanyeol closes his eyes, sighing deeply at the feeling of a soft pair of lips pressing against his jaw and then, Jongin burying his face on his chest.

Maybe, just maybe, Jongin could be the one to fix his heart. Maybe he is the one who can give him a little hope. Maybe he'll be the one to stay by him.


	7. Chapter 7

Baekhyun is not used to the uncomfortable silences between him and Jongdae. Being around his friend has always been calming and lighthearted, but lately, ever since Chanyeol came back, something has changed.

Jongdae seems to always be on edge, frowning and ready to jump at the smallest of provocations. Adding to that, Jongdae doesn't even bother hiding his annoyance towards Chanyeol whenever the man is around and that only makes it more uncomfortable and difficult for Baekhyun. He is trying, because he knows Jongdae just wants what's best for him and Daehyun, but sometimes is  _ too much _ . Sometimes Jongdae's opinions on how to raise his son cross lines that shouldn't be crossed.

Baekhyun understands Jongdae's position, he's been there since day one; but Jongdae also needs to understand that Daehyun is _not_ his son and as much as Baekhyun is grateful for the help and everything he has done for them, sometimes Jongdae has to take a step back and stay quiet.

Like right now.

"I'm just saying, Baek... I just don't agree on what Chanyeol is doing." Jongdae shrugs from where he's sitting by the kitchen island.

Baekhyun lets out an inaudible sigh, busying himself with the dishes from lunch.

"I don't see your point." He grumbles.

"Are you really okay with Chanyeol bringing a strange man into the picture? You don't know him."

"I don't think Jongin is a bad person." 

"You met him once." Jongdae rolls his eyes. "I think you should consider the situation, Baek." He says and Baekhyun has to bite his tongue to not talk back to his friend. 

"I trust Chanyeol, I know he'll never do anything to harm our son." Baekhyun says, as calmly as possible. "Besides, he was even willing to drop his relationship for Daehyun. If I didn't like the guy."

Jongdae scoffs. "Of course you said you're okay with it."

That does it for Baekhyun. He drops the plastic cup he's washing and turns around.

"What is that supposed to mean?" He asks with a frown on his face.

"It means that you always put everyone first. Sometimes you forget you have needs too; first it was Daehyun, now it's Chanyeol? Come on, Baek."

"So I should have asked him to dump Jongin? Just because I'm petty?" Baekhyun crosses his arms against his chest.

"Because we both know it's hurting you and that this is not going to end well. What I'm trying to do is prevent you and Daehyun from getting hurt."

"I know you care, Dae, but I know what I'm doing too. You said it in the beginning, Chanyeol deserved to know and now he does." 

"At what cost? Chanyeol has a life back in New York and he'll be going back soon, what are you going to do then? How are you going to explain to Daehyun that he might never see his dad again? You're trying to mend your mistake by making another oneㅡ"

"Enough." Baekhyun grumbles. "I know you're concerned about us, but don't treat me like I'm stupid."

Jongdae opens his mouth in disbelief. "That's not what I meant."

"Daehyun is my son as much as he is Chanyeol's. Things might not be ideal right now, but we'll figure something out. Chanyeol truly wants to be Dae's father and I want to give him that chance."

"What about you?" 

"What about me?" Baekhyun's frown deepens.

"When are  _ you _ going to give yourself a chance? You're still pining over a man who moved on years ago." 

Baekhyun snorts. "How can he move on from something that never happened in the first place? I don't blame him from trying to make a life for himself. It does hurt, but I have no right to feel wronged when I myself didn't have the balls to speak back then."

Jongdae blinks at how blunt Baekhyun is, not used to hear him talk that way, but the expression on Baekhyun's face is telling, determined. He's not going to change his mind, that much Jongdae does understand.

Jongdae gets it, he really does and he knows Baekhyun's point is right. Things didn't go as they should have gone from the start. An unnecessary mess was made and now they're all paying for the consequences. He knows it's not his place to tell Baekhyun what to do and how to raise his son, but all he wants is to prevent them from a major heartbreak. Both of them. Even if Baekhyun doesn't want him too, he's going to keep insisting, keep trying until they're both safe.

Is not going to be easy, Jongdae can already see the hardships he's gonna have to go through, but he's willing to endure anything just for them.

Whether Baekhyun likes it or not. 

"I just care for you two a lot." Jongdae mumbles, watching while Baekhyun finishes off with the dishes.

Baekhyun sighs and turns around, leaning against the counter and crossing his arms against his chest.

"I know." He nods. "And a lifetime will never be enough to pay you for everything you've done for us, but Dae... you have to understand that this is how things are right now. You can't always protect us from everything; there may be pain, but if we come to that, I will try my best to mend my baby's heart, even if it breaks mine into million pieces, too."

"I understand, but I just want you to be careful."

"Don't worry about us, we're going to be okay." Baekhyun gives him a reassuring smile.

Jongdae, not wanting to create more conflict between him and Baekhyun, just sighs and nods, feeling a little defeated.

He used to see Chanyeol as one of his best friends, but now, he doesn't know anymore how to feel. Hate is a very strong word and so Jongdae knows that's not exactly the definition he's looking for, but he definitely doesn't like having him around anymore.

Chanyeol represents a threat and even though there should be nothing to feel threatened about, Baekhyun was never his to begin with, Jongdae still keeps a little hope in his heart.

"Dae?" Baekhyun calls his name after he remains silent for a while. Jongdae looks up at him, feeling a little dazed. Baekhyun gives him a questioning look. "You okay?"

"Yeah, justㅡ"

"Uncle Dae?" Daehyun's sleepy voice interrupts him. 

Jongdae looks over his shoulder to find the little boy standing by the hallway, dressed in a pair of tiny, loose track pants and a gray shirt, messy hair and rubbing his right eye with the back of his hand. He's just woken up from his afternoon nap and he's hugging his dinosaurㅡ dragon stuffed toy against his chest.

"Hey, baby." A genuine smile crosses his face. Jongdae stands up and walks towards him, crouching down to be at the boy's eye level. "Did you sleep well?" Daehyun nods. "Are those new pants?" He asks later with a smile. Daehyun nods again. "Did you choose them from the store?"

Daehyun shakes his head. "It was a  _ jift  _ from appa Yeol."

Jongdae blinks, confused. Did he just hear that right?  _ Appa Yeol _ ? He turns to Baekhyun, but he doesn't seem affected by his son's choice of words. 

"He really does look a lot like Chanyeol, doesn't he?" Baekhyun comments. Jongdae doesn't respond, but he doesn't miss the proud look and Baekhyun's eyes full of adoration.

Jongdae swallows, this is definitely going to be really hard.

🔹

It took Baekhyun a while to finally gather his thoughts, man up and ask Chanyeol for a serious talk. He knew they should have done it a while ago, but while Chanyeol was busy spoiling their son, Baekhyun was busy trying to convince himself that talking is what they needed.

But coming to that conclusion was harder than he ever thought it would be; not because he didn't want to fix things up and clear up the tension that still lingered between them whenever they were together in the same room, but because Baekhyun was afraid of what could come out of it. He didn't want to acknowledge that nagging feeling in his chest known as guilt; he didn't want to accept the fact that yeah, maybe everything that happened had been his fault. Maybe if he hadn't kept quiet back then, his son could have had a very different life.  _ He _ could have had a very different life, a happier one. 

But it was about time, he couldn't keep postponing it because he's afraid and that morning, when he had asked Chanyeol for a serious talk, he had been more than pleased to do it.

"Appa!" Daehyun yells as soon as the door is opened and he dashes towards Chanyeol, clinging to his leg.

"Hey, baby." Chanyeol smiles, bending down a little to pick his son up. He leaves a loud smooch on his cheek, making him giggle and then positions his head for Daehyun to do the same. His kiss is noisier and wet, but Chanyeol loves it just the same. "Come on in." He tells Baekhyun, who closes the door behind him, still smiling due to the sweet exchange. "Did you miss me?" Chanyeol asks his son then.

"Yes!" Daehyun exclaims.

"Me too."

"Hey guys." Jongin appears in the living room a second later.

"Hi, Jongin." Baekhyun smiles a small smile. "So, uh... can we talk, then?"

"Of course, yes." Chanyeol nods, putting Daehyun back down on the floor.

"Hey, Daehyunee, how about you come with me and we let your daddy and appa talk?" Jongin offers his hand to the boy. 

"Adult talk?" Daehyun asks, tilting his head a little to the side.

"That's right. Come on, I'll show you something cool."

"Oki!" Daehyun chirps, taking Jongin's hand and following close behind.

Once they're out of sight, Baekhyun lets out a small sigh, meeting eyes with Chanyeol and feeling the slight tension in the air. This is it, he thinks, this is his chance to either make things right or worse.

Chanyeol gives him a reassuring smile and invites him to sit down on the couch. Baekhyun has never felt more nervous in his life before. 

"I want you to explain to me, what exactly happened, Baek." Chanyeol starts as soon as they sit down. "No more lies, no more excuses."

Baekhyun lets out a small sigh and nods. He looks down at his intertwined fingers, biting his lower lip while he thinks about the right words to say. 

"I remember that one time, on our second year of college," Baekhyun starts "we were going back to the dorms after lunch and we saw this family passing by and you said you couldn't understand how people would ruin their lives like that; tying themselves to a responsibility so big and then, a year later your sister gave birth to your niece. You didn't even go to see her at the hospital, "what's the point?" you said." He keeps his eyes down, unable to look at the younger. Chanyeol is dead silent. "Adding to that, you were so excited about leaving, I didn't want to be the one ruining things for you. I didn't want to be an obstacle. I didn't want you to resent me, with time." Baekhyun finishes. "There's really no other reason, I just... thought I was doing the right thing."

Silence fills the room for a few seconds that for Baekhyun feels like an eternity. He finally looks up, finding Chanyeol with his eyes fixed down on his lap, seemingly deep in thought.

The silence it's excruciatingly painful. Chanyeol is not saying anything and Baekhyun can feel his stomach starting to act up. He will throw up at any moment now, he's sure of it.

Another couple of minutes pass before Chanyeol moves, breathing through his nose as he looks up and meets eyes with Baekhyun.

Baekhyun feels his heart violently jumping inside his chest. Then, Chanyeol gives him a lopsided smile and shakes his head.

"I remember that time." He begins. "I remember being too caught up with the idea of freedom, that I never really came to think those words would affect my life in any way. Yeah, I did say that, but Baek... back then I was immature. I was a piece of shit, if you remember that." Chanyeol snorts. Baekhyun nods, sort of agreeing. "I just wanted to have the world in my hands and do whatever I wanted. We were young."

"What about your sister?" Baekhyun mumbles.

"We got into a huge fight two days before my niece was born and I was so mad at her, I thought that by not going to the hospital, was a way to make her regret wanting to stick her nose in my personal life, when I never asked her too. I acted childishly. I kind of regretted it after, I mean... when I met baby Rahee, she was this cute, tiny little thing and I admit I felt my whole point of view about babies changing at that moment."

"You never said anything." 

"You know I was kind of… headstrong. I was never going to accept that my sister's baby made me change the way I used to think about kids."

"But I was your best friend." Baekhyun says, almost hurt. "I wouldn't have judged you."

"I know you wouldn't and I should have trusted you with my feelings." Chanyeol looks down again. "I guess it was somehow my fault too... you got stuck with those thoughts because I never really cleared them out." He sighs. "Oh man, we could have saved ourselves so much trouble."

"Would you have stayed?" Baekhyun suddenly asks. "If I had told you about Daehyun as soon as I found out, would you really have stayed?"

"Yes, Baek." Chanyeol answers, without hesitating. "I would have never left you alone. We could have worked something out."

"What about what you always dreamt of? You  _ wanted _ that job." 

"I did and I'm not going to deny you that when I got it, I was the happiest I've ever been; but it's a different type of happiness. If you had told me back then that I was going to be a father, I would have been happy too. I used to think that after achieving my goals, having a family would be my next step. I grew up from that idiot you used to know." Chanyeol says. Baekhyun smiles at that. "I'm not saying it would have been perfect or that we would have had everything figured out, but we could have tried."

"I'm really sorry." Baekhyun mumbles.

"Listen, there's no point now dwelling in the past. You have no idea of how I felt when I met Daehyun and I'm so in love with him all I can think about right now is being his father. Recover lost time."

Baekhyun nods. "I get it. I just can't stop thinking about how it would have been if he had had you since the beginning. I feel terrible every time I think about it. I feel like I failed him."

"Don't ever say that." Chanyeol says with a serious tone, frowning as he reaches for the hand Baekhyun has over the table and squeezes it gently. "Daehyun is the most amazing kid, you made him that way." 

Baekhyun's breath hitches at the sudden contact, he looks at their hands and then back up at Chanyeol. He has a gentle smile on his lips and the look in his eyes is even gentler. Baekhyun chuckles to hide the trembling of his body.

"You're just saying that." He says, nervous as ever.

"Of course not and I want to be a part of what Daehyunee is and what he's going to become, if you'd allow me." 

"You don't even have to ask. I have to say, I was very surprised at how easily he warmed up to you. It doesn't happen that often."

"Maybe deep down he knew." Chanyeol shrugs. 

"Yeah, maybe..." Baekhyun mumbles, eyes falling again on their hands. "I'm sorry again, I know it doesn't make up for these four years butㅡ"

"Stop it." Chanyeol grumbles, then he pauses and smirks. "But I know how you can make it up to me." 

Baekhyun squints his eyes suspiciously and leans back, causing their hands to break apart.

"How...?"

"Next week it's my birthday." Chanyeol says 

"Yes, I know..." Baekhyun still sounds wary.

"So, I want us to spend the day together. Just you, me and Daehyun."

"Just the three of us?" Baekhyun quirks an eyebrow.

"Exactly." Chanyeol nods.

"What about Jongin?"

At that, Chanyeol lets out a small sigh. "Jongin has to go back to New York this Saturday, that's why we're meeting with the guys this Friday." Baekhyun nods, already knowing about the plans and Jongdae being not so happy about it. "So what do you say?"

"Yes, of course. Daehyun will be so happy about it."

Chanyeol's smile falters a little, but Baekhyun thinks he might just be seeing things.

"And… you? I mean, how do you feel about it? I don't want you to be uncomfortable."

"What? No, no." Baekhyun rushes to say. "I think it's a great idea, it'll make Daehyun good."

"Yes, all for Daehyun, right?" Chanyeol smiles again, but it doesn't quite reach his eyes.

"Absolutely, everything for him."

"So no more hard feelings?"

"Not at all." Baekhyun smiles.

"Perfect, then Iㅡ"

"Daddy! Daddy!" Daehyun comes in running, panting heavily and almost crashing against Baekhyun's leg.

"I'm sorry." Jongin runs inside behind. "He got a little too excited, couldn't stop him."

"It's fine. Oh, careful, baby." Baekhyun manages to catch him before he falls to the floor on his butt. "What is it?" He looks at Jongin and then at his son.

"Nini is teaching me how to dance!" Daehyun exclaims, giving little jumps up and down.

"Nini?" Baekhyun quirks an eyebrow.

"Oh, uh... he couldn't say my name and that's how my baby niece calls me. I thought... it would be easy for him. I'm sorry, I shouldn'tㅡ"

"No, no. It's totally fine." Baekhyun gives the man a crooked smile. "But it's time to leave, baby."

"I want to stay and dance!" Daehyun exclaims, crossing his little arms against his chest.

"Baby, I'm sure Jongin has better things to do thanㅡ"

"I don't mind." Jongin is quick to answer. "We were having a lot of fun."

"Yes!" Daehyun chirps.

Baekhyun turns to Chanyeol for help.

"I can take him home later." He offers.

Baekhyun puffs his cheeks. "Fine, but promise me you won't give appa any trouble."

"Promise!" Daehyun exclaims again, excited. He runs towards Jongin, takes him by the hand and drags him away.

"I'm sorry, maybe you had plans alreadyㅡ"

"Not really." Chanyeol shrugs. "I like having him here. Jongin likes it too... thank you, by the way, for letting him be close to our son."

"You don't have to thank me for that. Daehyun seems to like him, so..."

Chanyeol nods. "So..."

"So, I should get going." Baekhyun stands up.

"Okay."

"I really needed this talk."

"Me too." An awkward silence ensues, followed by an even more awkward hug.

Chanyeol wraps his arms around Baekhyun's back and so does Baekhyun, but as soon as it comes, it goes.

"Good bye, then."

"I'll drop him by later."

"Sure."

Chanyeol smiles and before it gets even /more/ awkward, Baekhyun grabs his jacket and walks out of the apartment.

He feels a lot lighter; even when there are still things they need to talk aboutㅡ like, what is going to happen when it's time for Chanyeol to go back to New York, but Baekhyun figures that's a conversation for another time. 

At least for now, he's going to let things flow and see where that takes them.

He trusts Chanyeol, so whatever it is, Baekhyun knows everything is going to be fine


	8. Chapter 8

Trying to convince Daehyun to stay still so Baekhyun could dress him up had never been so difficult before. 

He has been particularly difficult and Baekhyun had to chase him around the apartment promising all kinds of desserts, toys and candies, but nothing seemed to work. 

That, until Baekhyun mentioned Jongin's name. It had been like something clicking inside his head and the boy had stopped almost instantly, looking at his dad with wide eyes and a bright smile on his lips, quickly lifting his arms so Baekhyun could slide his shirt on. 

"I can't believe you love Nini more than you love me." Baekhyun says, feigning sadness as he buckles his son on his carseat. "I'm hurt."

Daehyun gasps. "No!" He exclaims. "I love you more than Nini!" The boy takes his dad's cheeks in his hands and squeezes. "You can't be hurt, daddy." His eyes fill with tears. "I won't love Nini anymore."

"Oh, baby, no no." Baekhyun rushes to say. "Don't cry, daddy is joking." He says while softly caressing his son's cheeks with his fingers. "You can love Nini, it's okay." 

Daehyun sobs. "You won't be sad?" 

Baekhyun shakes his head. "I won't be sad. You do like him, don't you?"

"Yes! He teaches me how to dance. But Daehyunee is not good." The boy pouts.

Baekhyun chuckles, removing a few strands of dark hair out of his son's eyes. "That's why you will learn and then, you'll be the best. Now, we have to go, your uncles and appa are waiting for you." His kisses his forehead before pulling away and closing the door to get to the driver's seat.

By the time they arrive at Chanyeol's apartment, Daehyun has made him sing the alphabet song quite a few times. 

As soon as the door is opened, Daehyun jumps from one dad's arms to the other, squealing and laughing.

"What took you guys so long?" Chanyeol asks, moving aside to let Baekhyun in.

"He was being difficult." Baekhyun looks at Daehyun. "And didn't want to put on his shirt." 

"Is that true?" Chanyeol pokes his son's belly.

"No!" Daehyun yells, but he bobs his head up and down. 

"What did we talk about the other day uh? You have to be a good boy if you want that puppy." Chanyeol says, stretching his arm at Baekhyun so he can give him Daehyun's bag. 

"I am, I promise." Daehyun pouts again.

"Don't let him fool you again." Baekhyun warns Chanyeol. "Where is everyone?"

"Kitchen. Only Junmyeon and Minseok are here. Sehun won't be able to make it and Kyungsoo had a family emergency."

"Jongdae?" Baekhyun asks, following Chanyeol further into the apartment.

It takes the taller a few seconds to answer. "I don't know." He shrugs. "I thought he was going to call you."

"I haven't talked to him since that little fight we had." Baekhyun sighs.

"Is he still being an immature ass?" Chanyeol snorts. 

"Don't be mean to him." Baekhyun rolls his eyes. "He just doesn't want us to… be hurt."

Chanyeol stops and turns around, a small frown on his face. Daehyun distractedly plays with his hair, oblivious of the rising tension between his parents.

"Why would you guys be hurt?" Chanyeol mumbles. "Are you implying something?"

Baekhyun sighs. "No, Chanyeol, I'm not, but we still have a few things to talk about."

Chanyeol glances at Daehyun. "When I told you I would never hurt you or our son, I meant it." 

"I know, it's justㅡ" Baekhyun stops when Daehyun's curious eyes land on him "we'll talk about that later."

"Right." Chanyeol grumbles, unconvinced, but he doesn't push it. It's not the time. "Look who's finally here!" He exclaims, entering the kitchen.

"Nini!" Daehyun screams, pulling away from Chanyeol, trying to escape his arms and asking for Jongin's instead.

Jongin laughs, putting down his glass of wine to take the boy in his arms.

"Can we dance?" Daehyun bounces in his arms.

"Of course. After we eat, what do you think?"

"Yes!"

"Daehyun warmed up pretty fast to you." Junmyeon comments casually to Jongin. 

"He did. I never expected that." Jongin smiles.

"Aren't you guys jealous?" Minseok teases Baekhyun and Chanyeol.

"Why would we?" Chanyeol shrugs.

"At the end of the day, he's your son." Jongin looks at Baekhyun, then at Chanyeol. "Besides, Daehyunee loves his daddies very much, right?" Daehyun nods eagerly.

"I admire you, guys." Junmyeon says. "I've never seen someone co-parenting as good as you."

"Daehyunee is what matters right now." Chanyeol says and Baekhyun nods in agreement.

"I don't see the point in fighting when we can be civilized with each other. We talked and we're good." Baekhyun comments as he pours himself some wine.

"That's very nice to hear." The sarcasm on the voice doesn't go unnoticed. 

They five of them turn around to find Jongdae standing by the kitchen entrance, carrying a box of donuts and a bag of gummy worms.

Baekhyun bites his lip, glancing over at Chanyeol, who's now frowning, instinctively shielding Daehyun from Jongdae's view. He sighs, this probably won't end up well.

Jongdae is aware that all eyes are on him. But he doesn't really care. He takes a quick look around and ignoring the growing tension in the room, he walks towards the kitchen island and drops the box of donuts there; then, he takes the bag of gummy worms, glancing up at Jongin before smiling at Daehyun.

"Look what I got for you." Jongdae says, showing the boy the bag of gummies. His smile is bright and wide when he sees Daehyun's face lighting up at the promise of treats. Daehyun squirms a little in Jongin's arms, making grabby hands. Jongdae chuckles, finally giving the boy what he wants.

"Daehyun, what do we say?" Baekhyun says when his son starts to struggle with the bag.

"Thank you, uncle Dae!" Daehyun chirps, but his attention is solely focused on trying to open the bag.

"Let me help you." Jongdae says, getting the bag back so he can open it.

"Just a few." Baekhyun warns. "It's almost bedtime."

Daehyun totally ignores his dad's words, taking one of the worms and bringing it close to Jongin's mouth.

"Ah." The boy says, opening his mouth as wide as he can.

"Oh? Me?" Jongin asks, a little surprised. Daehyun nods, mouth still open.

Daehyun manages to feed Jongin half a worm, before Jongdae is snatching the bag back.

"Your dad is right, you shouldn't eat sugar this late." The silence in the kitchen suddenly feels heavy and awkward. "I'll give them back to you later, okay?" 

Daehyun nods slowly, but he's pouting and his lip is trembling.

Chanyeol watches the whole thing with his fists tightly clenched on his sides. If it wasn't because Baekhyun would never forgive him for not inviting Jongdae, the man wouldn't even be there. 

The atmosphere in the living room is tense and awkward, too silent for Baekhyun's liking. Chanyeol and Jongdae haven't stopped glaring at each other the entire time and Baekhyun is sure he's not the only one who has noticed.

Junmyeon and Minseok glance at each other every now and then, and Jongin had quickly offered himself to go back to the kitchen and make a snack for Daehyun as soon as the boy stated how hungry he was.

Chanyeol officially introducing Jongin as his boyfriend to their friends had been nothing in comparison to this. 

Baekhyun doesn't really know how to feel, all he wants is for everyone to get along. He wants Jongdae to understand that things are not as easy as he thinks they are.

As much as he still has feelings for Chanyeol, Baekhyun is aware that their time has passed and he has come to accept that Chanyeol has found someone who makes him happy. Maybe one day he'll find that person too, but for now, the only thing that matters is his son. Daehyun deserves to have his two fathers in his life, maybe not together, but present.

A love like the one in Chanyeol's eyes everytime he looks at their son, can't be found anywhere else and Baekhyun is willing to give up everything, for his son to be loved like that.

"Look, daddy!" Daehyun comes in running with a small plastic plate on his hands. "Nini made me a Mickey sandwich!" The boy proudly shows his dad the snack with the shape of Mickey Mouse's face.

"That looks so cool, baby." Baekhyun smiles down at his son.

"You shouldn't let him eat that much." Jongdae butts in. "It's almost bedtime, like you said"

"It's just a small sandwich." Baekhyun answers.

"And dad says I can stay up late today." Daehyun announces, busy munching on his sandwich and swinging his short legs back and forth on the couch. Baekhyun rises an inquisitive eyebrow at the decision made without consulting him.

"Just for today, alright?" Chanyeol reminds him, looking sheepish, forgetting for a moment that Jongdae's still there. Blame him for wanting to spend more time with his son.

"Oki." Daehyun nods.

"Don't you think he spoils him too much?" Jongdae grumbles, referring to Chanyeol and speaking as if the other guy isn't even there.

"How I raise my son is none of your business." Chanyeol spits.

"Raiseㅡ" Jongdae scoffs. "Are we having this conversation again? Should I remind you who was the one who stayed by their side for almost five years?"

"Guys, pleaseㅡ"

"That wasn't my choice." Chanyeol cuts Baekhyun off. His words hurt, because Baekhyun knows he's right.

"You might be his biological father, but it was me the one who was there every time he was sick."

"Jongdae." Baekhyun says with a warning tone.

"I was there on his first visit to the hospital, the first time he fellㅡ"

"This is not the placeㅡ" Baekhyun tries once again, seeing how his son is looking more and more confused by his uncle Jongdae rising his voice.

"His first smile, his first step, his first word." 

That seems to be enough for Chanyeol. He jumps up the couch, ready to launch himself at Jongdae, but Jongin is quick to grab him by the arm and keep him in place. Chanyeol struggles a little, but not really making enough effort to break Jongin's grip.

"What? Are you going to punch me in front of your son?" Jongdae grins, standing up as well.

"That's enough." Baekhyun hisses. "Junmyeon, can you please take Daehyun to Chanyeol's room for a moment?"

Not knowing what to say and with wide eyes, Junmyeon takes Daehyun in his arms and disappears in the hallway, followed by a very shocked Minseok.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Baekhyun turns to Jongdae.

"I'm just being honest here." Jongdae shrugs.

"No, you're being an ass."

"For saying the truth?" Jongdae takes a step closer to him. 

Baekhyun glances over his shoulder, only then noticing Jongin has taken Chanyeol into the kitchen and is now handing him a glass of water.

"I just don't understand, why are you being so stubborn." Baekhyun runs his fingers through his hair, already frustrated. "Why does it bother you so much that Chanyeol is trying his best to be Dae's dad? Wasn't you the one who insisted Chanyeol should know since the beginning? He  _ is _ his dad, after all."

The laugh that leaves Jongdae's mouth is bitter; he looks away for just a second before looking at Baekhyun again. "You know very well why." Jongdae mumbles.

Baekhyun remains silent for a moment. "We've talked about this." He says.

"Not really, no." 

"I don'tㅡ"

"You asked me to stay by your side and I did even when I knewㅡ" Jongdae stops himself, glancing back to see Chanyeol's eyes fixed on his back "even when I knew what I know."

"I clearly remember telling you you didn't have to anymore. Daehyun was and is /my/ responsibility. You choose to stay."

"Because I love you and you know it." Jongdae speaks through gritted teeth.

Baekhyun lets out a sigh. He didn't want things to turn this way. He didn't want to hurt his friend like that.

"But I don't." Baekhyun says, clearly; he looks down at his feet, unable to meet his friend's eyes. "I don't love you like you want me to."

It doesn't come as a surprise for Jongdae, it has never been a secret, but it doesn't hurt any less.

"I did so many things for you and that kid. I thought you could at least give me a chance, but you're still so hung up over someone who clearly doesn't give a shit about you." Jongdae spits, poking Baekhyun on the chest rather harshly.

"Jongdaeㅡ"

"You're so blind, so stupid for believing that things were going to be fine just like that. Soon, Chanyeol is going to leave and you're going to be left alone. Again." Jongdae takes a step forward, Baekhyun one back. His chest rapidly moving up and down, tears starting to roll down his cheeks. "I'm not gonna be there next time you need someone to make you feel better."

Baekhyun clenches his jaw. His face is soaked with tears, but his blood is boiling with anger, he's had enough. Baekhyun presses his hands on the other's chest and pushes him away.

"If everything you did was just because you wanted something back from me, then who's the selfish one?" Baekhyun starts. "Don't you dare guilt-trip me."

"You used me, Baekhyun." Jongdae grunts.

Baekhyun frowns, confusion appearing on his face. " _ I _ used you? I never forced you to do anything.  _ You _ promised you'd stay, even when you knew my feelings."

"I did it because I love you." 

"You keep saying that, but who are you trying to convince? Me or yourself?" 

Jongdae's mouth drops open. "You don't know what I've been through all these years. You don't know how hard it has been."

"And you think I've had it easy?" Baekhyun snorts. "You're so fucking full of yourself! I really don't wanna do this anymore." Baekhyun shakes his head, moving aside so he can walk past Jongdae.

"No, we're not done yet." Jongdae stops him, grabbing Baekhyun by the arm and pulling him back, so strongly, it almost makes Baekhyun fall.

"The fuck is wrong with you?" Baekhyun hisses, pulling on his arm, but Jongdae's fingers are digging into his skin. "Let go of me."

"I said we're not done yet."

"You're fucking hurting me."

"You're not going anywhere, Baekhyun."

At that point, the anger in Baekhyun's body becomes impossible to contain, without thinking it twice, Baekhyun swings his free arm and crashes his fist against Jongdae's cheek, making him lose his grip and stumble back.

There's fire in Jongdae's eyes by the time he regains his balance. 

He raises his hand as well, but before he can do anything else, a strong grip on his wrist stop him.

"You touch him and I'll kill you." Chanyeol spits on his face. "I suggest you to leave." He adds, but Jongdae doesn't say anything and just tries to make Chanyeol let go of his wrist. 

"I'm not done." Jongdae growls.

"But I am. I don't want to see you near my son  _ or _ Baekhyun anymore."

"Chanyeol." Baekhyun tries, but his voice comes out weak due the shock.

Jongdae scoffs. Chanyeol's grip loosens and he's finally able to pull his arm back. 

Jongdae glances one last time at Baekhyun before taking his jacket and storms out of the door.

Baekhyun takes a shaky breath, knees giving in. Jongin moves fast and manages to catch him and helps him sit on the couch.

"Hey, Baek." Jongin mumbles. "He's shaking, get him a glass of water." He tells Chanyeol and the taller man quickly does as he's told. "Baekhyun, are you okay?" Baekhyun gives him a hesitant nod.

"I hit him." Baekhyun whispers. "I didn't want toㅡ"

"It's okay." Jongin takes the glass of water from Chanyeol's hands and gives it to Baekhyun, helping him a little so his shaky hands won't spill all the content. "It's okay." Jongin repeats. "You have to calm down, Daehyun can't see you like this. Breathe."

"Come on, I'll take you to the guest room. You guys are staying the night." Chanyeol makes Baekhyun stand up on his shaky legs and slowly takes him to the other room.

Jongin lets out a long sigh. This isn't quite exactly how he imagined this night would go. 

🔸

After forcing Baekhyun to lie down, Chanyeol leaves the room, closing the door behind him. 

Junmyeon is coming out of his room, worry written all over his face.

"What the hell happened out there?" He grumbles.

Chanyeol shakes his head. "Jongdae lost it. It's fine. Daehyun?"

"Minseok has him. He was falling asleep, but then all the screaming started and he got restless. He's been asking for Baekhyun. Where's Jongdae?" 

"He left." Chanyeol answers, dryly. "I'm gonna take Daehyun to Baekhyun."

Junmyeon nods. "I'm gonna see if I can talk to Jongdae."

Chanyeol shrugs. "I don't care about him anymore." He says, going into his bedroom before Junmyeon can say anything.

As soon as Daehyun sees him, he squirms on Minseok's arms, standing on the bed so Chanyeol can pick him up.

"Where's daddy?"

"He's getting ready for bed." Chanyeol forces a smile. "You're staying here tonight."

"Why was daddy screaming?" Daehyun asks, lower lip trembling.

"Well, he was... having a small argument with uncle Jongdae, but everything is fine. Now, you have to sleep, it's late." Chanyeol tells him as they head to the guest room.

Baekhyun quickly wipes his tears as the door opens and smiles for his son.

"Hey, baby."

Chanyeol puts him down on the bed and Daehyun is on his daddy's arm in seconds.

"Are you crying?" He asks, placing his hands over Baekhyun's damp cheeks.

Baekhyun lets out a strained laugh and shakes his head. "Daddy is a little sad because he had a fight with uncle Dae, but I'm fine, let's just sleep, okay?"

"Can appa sleep with us tonight?" Daehyun asks as he gets comfortable next to Baekhyun, leaving a considerable amount of space for Chanyeol to lie in.

Both Baekhyun and Chanyeol exchange terrified glances, but Chanyeol can't say no; not after what happened, so he removes his shoes and gets under the blankets. He figures he can always walk out once they are both asleep and that was his intention. It really was, but as Daehyun throws his feet over his stomach to get a more comfortable position and Baekhyun snuggles into the blankets, surely emotionally exhausted, Chanyeol begins to feel his body shutting down as well.

He unconsciously starts to softly play with his son's tiny toes. Daehyun wriggles, but he doesn't wake up.

And so, Chanyeol lets himself fall asleep to the sound of soft snores and little puppy yelps


	9. Chapter 9

Chanyeol wakes up with a sore neck and terrible back pain; only then he realizes that he hasn't moved an inch all night and that Baekhyun and Daehyun are occupying most of the space on the bed. He rubs his eyes and yawns, cracks his neck and smiles at the image of  _ his _ boys all sprawled out like starfishes.

The implication of the thoughts instantly hits him, so Chanyeol shakes his head and frowns. He can't be having that kind of inappropriate thoughts, not about Baekhyun at least.

Chanyeol checks the hour on his phone, it's almost nine in the morning: he slept more than he should have. Groaning, Chanyeol gets on his feet, careful of not waking them up and then leaves the room, closing the door behind him.

Jongin is already in the kitchen, sitting by the island with a bowl of cereal, a plate of fruit and a cup of coffee.

"Good morning." Jongin says, looking at him from over his mug.

"Morning." Chanyeol lazily replies, walking around the island to greet his boyfriend with a kiss on the cheek. "I'm sorry, Daehyun asked me to stay and I wasn't planning on actually stay the night, but my body completely shut down andㅡ"

"Yeol, it's okay." Jongin smiles. "I went to look for you last night, but you were already asleep and the three of you were snoring so loud, I swear to god, it sounded like a hundred angry bears."

Chanyeol's eyes widen. First of all, he doesn't snore, Baekhyun does and second of all, he was tired, everyone snores a little when tired.

"I do notㅡ"

"You do, actually. Anyway, it was kind of cute, you had Daehyunee's feet on your face and he was squeezing Baekhyun's face with his hand. I took a picture, look."

Jongin grins widely, showing Chanyeol the few photos in his gallery. It looks awkward, with Daehyun occupying pretty much the whole space and the both of them barely holding onto the edges of the bed.

Chanyeol chuckles, smiling fondly at the images.

"Daehyunee is the cutest baby I've ever met." Jongin says, getting his phone back. "Can I post this on my Instagram?" He asks, but before Chanyeol can refuse, he's already editing the photos.

"Isn't Daehyun the only baby you know aside from your niece?" Chanyeol quirks an eyebrow, walking around the kitchen to get a mug and pour himself some coffee.

Jongin shrugs, too focused on thinking about a cool caption for the picture. Chanyeol smiles and shakes his head.

"Good morning." The new voice in the kitchen makes them both look up.

Baekhyun stands by the entrance, hair a mess and swollen eyes.

"Good morning." Chanyeol replies. "How are you feeling?" He asks.

"Want some coffee?" Jongin asks, putting aside his phone.

"Yes, please." Baekhyun sighs. "And how am I feeling... well, like shit. I might have lost a friend for good." He says as he sits down on one of the stools. Jongin hands him the coffee a moment later.

"Maybe if you talk to him, you could clear things up." Jongin offers.

Baekhyun shakes his head. "Jongdae is stubborn as hell. I don't know if he'll ever forgive me."

"He doesn't have to forgive you for anything." Chanyeol spits, frowning. "You didn't do anything wrong."

"What if I did? What if I... actually used him? Iㅡ it was never my intention to hurt him like that."

"You didn't force him to stay, like you said." Chanyeol shrugs, taking a small sip of his coffee later.

"But... he's been here for us all this time."

"What... did he exactly tell you?" Jongin asks, carefully. "If you don't mind me asking."

"He said... that he loves me." Baekhyun mumbles. "More than just a friend."

"And what?" Chanyeol almost growls. "Does he want you to pay him back somehow? If you do something for someone you claim to love, you do it because you want to and not because you're expecting something in return."

"Maybe he just didn't... expressed himself properly?" Jongin tries instead.

"Bullshit." Chanyeol scoffs. "He knew very well what he was saying."

"This is so wrong." Baekhyun looks down. "I know Jongdae loves Daehyun very much and I will forever be grateful, but... I can't force my feelings, Iㅡ" He looks at Chanyeol, then down again "it doesn't matter now. I don't know if he'll ever talk to me again."

"Hey, stop thinking about that for a while okay? How about some breakfast?" Chanyeol smiles, hoping to relieve some of the tension.

"Oh, no, it's okay. We overstayed and you guys probably have things to do. You're leaving today, right?" Baekhyun asks Jongin. 

"Yeah, but my flight is at two, we still have plenty of time." Jongin smiles. "I'm sure Chanyeol can fix some good food."

"What? Why me?" Chanyeol shrieks.

"Because we say so."

"We?" Chanyeol frowns.

"Me, Baekhyun and that little guy there." Jongin smiles, pointing at the kitchen entrance. 

Baekhyun turns around to see his son there, sleepy eyes and hair sticking everywhere.

"Hi, baby." Baekhyun stands up to pick him up. 

"Daddy, I'm hungry." Daehyun says.

"Oh? Why don't you tell appa what you want for breakfast?"

"Bacon!" Daehyun exclaims with no hesitation.

"I want waffles." Jongin requests.

"You already ate cereal!" Chanyeol exclaims.

"That's not a proper breakfast." Jongin shrugs.

"Great, perfect." Chanyeol rolls his eyes. "Something else you wanna add to the menu?' He asks Baekhyun in a mocking tone.

"Omelettes will be nice."

"I was joking!" Chanyeol yells as he sees the three of them walking out of the kitchen one by one, leaving him alone to work on all the requested food.

🔸

Daehyun is sobbing hard, tears soaking his cheeks and Chanyeol's shirt. They both have been trying to calm him down ever since they said goodbye to Jongin at the airport.

Baekhyun never expected for his son to react like that over someone he met not so long ago. It breaks his heart to see his baby like that.

Chanyeol is also mopping. Walking with his head hanging low and dragging his feet all across the parking lot. They both look like kicked puppies and it's too much.

"Come on, guys." He finally speaks once they're all in the car, ready to drive out of the airport. Chanyeol handed him the keys, not feeling in the mood to drive. "You're going to see him again soon. Daehyunee, appa is going to call Nini every now and then so you can talk to him, alright?" Baekhyun looks at his son through the rearview mirror. 

Daehyun refuses to look at him, but Baekhyun can tell he's pouting.

"Yeol, you're not helping." Baekhyun puffs his cheeks.

"I know, I'm sorry... it's just" Chanyeol sighs "is not that easy." He mumbles.

"What do you mean?" Baekhyun quirks an eyebrow as he makes sure he's good to go.

"Well, Jongin is going back to New York because his group is having some... problems." Chanyeol says, leaning against the car door.

"What problems?"

"Disbanding." Chanyeol mumbles.

"Oh..." Baekhyun bites his lip "how bad is it?" 

"Bad. It's divided, three members want to stay and three want to leave. The ones who want to leave want a fair treatment and want their royalties. The company doesn't want to give into that because there's still three years of their contract left."

"And Jongin? On which side is he?" Baekhyun asks, frowning.

"He wants to leave. Says it doesn't feel the same as the beginning and being honest... I agree."

"That sucks. So... will Jongin be coming back?" 

"I don't think so." Chanyeol shakes his head. "He hasn't really told me what it is that he wants to do after he leaves the group." 

He looks down at his lap and Baekhyun can feel his distress.

"Hey." Baekhyun says softly. "I'm sure he's just trying to figure out what to do himself. Is not an easy decision to make."

"I know. I just want to know how he's feeling." Chanyeol puffs his cheeks.

"Park Chanyeol." Baekhyun starts with a slightly mocking tone. "Since when are you so sensitive about things?" He quirks an eyebrow.

Chanyeol chuckles. "Shut up."

"But really, you must uh... love him a lot." Baekhyun adds, discreetly clearing his throat.

Chanyeol looks at him, blinks and then looks away again. "Well, I... yeah, I do..."

Baekhyun frowns at his hesitation. "Chanyeolㅡ"

"Hey, buddy." Chanyeol cuts Baekhyun off, turning around to look at his son. "Why don't we go somewhere for lunch? What do you want to eat?"

Daehyun's eyes light up. "Burger!" The boy exclaims.

"Burger it is, then. And then what do you want to do?" Chanyeol keeps asking.

Baekhyun narrows his eyes at Chanyeol's avoidance of the subject, but he doesn't comment on it anymore. He continues driving, he'll make sure to make Chanyeol talk soon.


	10. Chapter 10

Chanyeol has never been so excited about his birthday before. He's been waiting impatiently for a week and a half. 

Last night, exactly at midnight, he received a video call from Jongin. It was the first time ever since they started dating that Chanyeol had seen him so down. 

Things with the group and the company are not going well yet and according to Jongin, it doesn't seem to be moving in a good direction. Chanyeol had hung up worried, but with Jongin assuring him everything was going to be fine.

Either way, Chanyeol decided he was not going to let that dampen his mood to spend his birthday with his son and Baekhyun.

He's supposed to drive to their apartment for a special breakfast, especially prepared for Daehyun himself, according to the text Baekhyun sent him first thing in the morning. 

Chanyeol stands in front of Baekhyun's door, fixing his jacket and smiling widely at the thought of starting his birthday like this, with a breakfast with his famㅡ with Baekhyun and his son. The smile disappears a little, but he quickly shakes off the negative thoughts and proceeds to knock on the door, but as soon as his knuckles touch the wood, the door swings open. Chanyeol frowns, why would Baekhyun leave the door open? That's not very safe.

Ready to scold the man, Chanyeol pushes his way inside, not expecting the unusual, loud greeting, with both Baekhyun and Daehyun yelling  _ happy birthday _ and a bunch of confetti being thrown at his face. Chanyeol spits the few pieces of tiny colorful paper that managed to get into his mouth.

"Happy  _ bearday _ ! Happy  _ bearday _ , appa!" Daehyun exclaims, jumping up and down, the brightest smile Chanyeol has seen so far adorning his cute face.

"Oh my god." Chanyeol says, feeling a little breathless. 

"Appa!" Daehyun calls for his attention, asks to be picked up and so Chanyeol does, receiving a tight hug and a wet kiss on the cheek. 

"Good morning." Chanyeol smiles widely, returning the hug, his heart melting at the display of affection. Never in his life he imagined he would be in this situation. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yes!" Daehyun chirps. "Did you?"

"I did, but I was excited about the surprise your dad told me you have for me. What is it, baby?" Chanyeol looks at his son, curiously.

Daehyun nods and begins to squirm on Chanyeol's arms to be put down again. "Come!" He exclaims once Chanyeol does.

"Happy birthday." Baekhyun says with a small voice and a sheepish smile. 

"Aren't you going to give me a hug too?" Chanyeol asks, taking a step closer towards him.

Baekhyun clears his throat, looking down for a second and then up again, nodding before opening his arms for Chanyeol. The taller grins, wrapping his arms around Baekhyun and squeezing him tight. 

He can barely breathe, but the feeling in his chest of having Chanyeol this close is unexplainable. His heart is racing and his blood is rushing to his brain to such speed he's starting to feel dizzy. Chanyeol is warm and soft, he smells amazingly good and there's no other place where Baekhyun would like to be other thanㅡ

"Daddy!" Daehyun yells from the kitchen, breaking the moment Baekhyun was enjoying so much. He smiles when they break apart, because Chanyeol looks happy, he can see it in the way his eyes shine so bright.

So it doesn't really matter for Baekhyun, if he doesn't get to spend more time in Chanyeol's arms, just knowing that  _ their _ son is the source of that happiness is enough.

Chanyeol looks at him after taking a few steps, a sign for Baekhyun to follow and he does, happily.

"So!" Chanyeol exclaims, walking into the kitchen. "What did you get for me?" He asks, watching as his son is now sitting on one of the stools, smiling widely at him, excitedly jiggling as the obvious large breakfast rests on the kitchen island. 

"Did you make all this?" Chanyeol's eyes go wide, there _is_ a lot of food.

"Yes!" Daehyun chirps. "Well, no, daddy did. But it was my idea and I helped!" He points at himself with his little finger. "Do you like it?"

"I love it and I'm hungry too." 

"Sit, sit!" Daehyun claps his hands. 

Chanyeol glances at Baekhyun, who is covering his mouth with his hand trying to suppress his giggles.

"What?" Chanyeol asks with a flirty tone, grinning.

"Nothing." Baekhyun shakes his head. "Just... I'll be right back." He says and disappears in the hallway, coming back a minute later with his phone. "We need pictures."

"Alright." Chanyeol smiles, walking around the kitchen island and grabbing Daehyun by the waist to lift him up; the boy squeals and giggles as Chanyeol sits him down on his lap and Baekhyun gets busy taking one photo after another. "Get over here." Chanyeol calls for him.

"Oh, no, no. It's fineㅡ"

"Nonsense, come on." Chanyeol insists. He takes the phone away from Baekhyun's hands and begins snapping selfie after selfie. "I want all these." He says several minutes later as he goes through Baekhyun's gallery. "Oh..." He mumbles suddenly, his thumb stopping from sliding. "I definitely want these too." He smirks at Baekhyun.

"Which ones?" Curious, Baekhyun looks over Chanyeol's shoulder, almost screeching when he sees himself on the screen, wearing his light blue pajamas with bunny prints and a facemask, Daehyun next to him sticking his tongue out and scrunching his face. They might have had a little selfie session last night, out of boredom.

It's ridiculous, being honest, the amount of silly pictures they took.

"W-why would you want those?" Baekhyun frowns, reaching to get his phone back, but Chanyeol is faster to move away and he keeps scrolling.

"Birthday present. I'm  _ so _ printing this one!" Chanyeol laughs. Baekhyun looks again and it's him, with Daehyun sitting on the pillow above his head, his tiny feet pressing against his cheeks.

"That's embarrassing! Give it back!"

"I think they're cute. What do you think, baby? Should daddy give them to me as a gift?" 

"Yes!" Daehyun exclaims, but he's not really paying attention, as he's focused on the food in front of him.

"Hyun has spoken, I want all of these sent to my phone."

"Fine!" Baekhyun snatches his phone away. "But no uploading to any social media."

"Alright, fair is fair." Chanyeol agrees. "Can we eat now?" 

"Daddy, please!" Daehyun pleads.

"I'm not stopping you guys." Baekhyun shrugs, taking the seat next to Chanyeol.

Daehyun starts first with the pancakes, spreading whipped cream all over his plate.

"Should we let him eat that much sugar?" Chanyeol asks, a little worried.

"Maybe just for today." Baekhyun smiles, putting a strawberry into his mouth. 

If someone had told Chanyeol, years ago, that he would be enjoying his birthday with a delicious breakfast, in the company of his son, he would have scoffed. 

If someone had told him that his heart would beat this fast because of a tiny smile, he would have laughed.

His chest feels full as he watches his son soak his pancakes with maple syrup, little tongue picking out in concentration. Chanyeol can't hold back the huge smile on his face and he's so focused on the scene that only the sound of a camera clicking catches his attention. 

"What was that?" He asks, eyebrow raised. Baekhyun is looking at him with a strange glint in his eyes, tightly holding his phone against his chest.

"Nothing, is just... the way you look at him..."

"What are you talking about?" Chanyeol scoffs slightly, grabbing the last bite of his eggroll.

Baekhyun stares at him for a few seconds before moving closer to him, showing him the picture on the screen. Chanyeol blinks, looks at Baekhyun and then back a the picture.

"You're whipped." Baekhyun quirks an eyebrow and giggles.

"Shut up." Chanyeol grumbles, but he doesn't deny it. The adoration he's looking at his son with it's impossible to hide.

"Thank you." Baekhyun suddenly says, catching Chanyeol off of guard.

"For what?"

"For accepting him... and loving him." Baekhyun mumbles.

"How could I not love him?" A lopsided smile curls on his lips as he turns his head towards Daehyun, who's now slicing a banana with a butter knife. "He's the most wonderful little boy I've ever met."

"Iㅡ"

"Appa! Say  _ ah!" _ Daehyun interrupts, holding a fork with the banana he was slicing now dipped in peanut butter.

Chanyeol grimaces, he can already feel his teeth aching, but he opens his mouth anyway; anything to make his boy happy. "Good?" Daehyun asks once the banana is in his mouth. Chanyeol gives him a thumbs up.

"So... what do you guys wanna do?" Baekhyun asks, finally getting to eat his own breakfast.

"I was thinking that maybe we could take Hyun to the Zooㅡ"

"Yes!" Daehyun exclaims.

"But it's  _ your _ birthday." Baekhyun says. "I thought we could do adult stuff instead." He adds, just to tease the boy.

"Hm, that sounds like a good idea too!"

"No! To the zoo!" Daehyun pouts.

"But baby, if appa wants to do something else, we should let him decide."

"Appa, please." Daehyun looks at him with big, round eyes.

Chanyeol stays silent for a moment. "Alright." He finally says. "Only if you eat your egg rolls."

Daehyun bobs his head up and down so fast Chanyeol thinks he's gonna break his neck. The boy pushes aside everything sweet and begins to eat his rolls. 

Baekhyun smiles, wishing this could be like this every morning. Wishing they could be a real family, but for now, this will have to do.

🔸

"Appa! Look! Look!" Daehyun exclaims, grabbing Chanyeol by the hand and dragging him along with him to the petting zoo area. "Can we go in? Please, please!" The boy tugs on his hand.

"Why don't we walk around a little first? So we can see all the animals?" Chanyeol suggests, squatting in front of his son.

Daehyun hums, then turns to look at Baekhyun, who gives him a small nod. "Oki. But we have to take lots of pictures."

"Whatever you want." Chanyeol smiles, ruffling the boy's hair. Daehyun giggles, then he starts walking ahead. "This is going to be a long day, isn't it?" Chanyeol asks Baekhyun, seeing how Daehyun jumps around, pulling and punching the balloon with panda shape they bought for him at the entrance.

Baekhyun chuckles. "You are in for one hell of a ride." He says, patting Chanyeol's back. "Dae! Be careful!" Baekhyun exclaims, going after his son before more people gather around.

The zoo isn't that crowded and Chanyeol is thankful for that. He knew Daehyun was a very energetic little boy, but he never imagined he was /that/ energetic.

Going from one area to another: the penguins, the lions, the tigers, the monkeys, the bears, even the birds, Daehyun would squeal excitedly and ask him to pick him up and put him over his shoulders to have a better view. And oh, how much it hurts. Chanyeol is sure he won't be able to get up tomorrow. 

Baekhyun just follows, laughing and giggling as he snaps picture after picture, most of Daehyun and Chanyeol. They are going to be a cute addition to his collection.

By the time Chanyeol cannot stand another minute on his feet, it's already 5 p.m.; Daehyun is carrying a small bag from the souvenir store and a small stuffed tiger that growls if he presses its paw. Daehyun had given Baekhyun his puppy eyes to get it.

"Can we  _ please _ sit down for a moment?" Chanyeol begs after finishing a whole bottle of water in one sip.

"We should eat something, I'm hungry." Baekhyun suggests.

"Yes!" Chanyeol exclaims without hesitation, the sole idea of finally sitting up and rest sounding wonderful. "Let's eat!"

Feeling bad for Chanyeol, Baekhyun picks Daehyun up this time; the boy looking a little tired as well. 

They sit down at a bench table in the food court area. Daehyun quickly reaches for Chanyeol, but Baekhyun is fast to stop him, the younger looks exhausted.

"Let appa rest for a bit, hm? Come sit with me." Baekhyun pats the empty space next to him.

"It's okay." Chanyeol smiles. 

"Are you sure?" Baekhyun quirks an eyebrow.

"Of course. I can take it." He grabs Daehyun and sits him on his lap.

"Alright then, I'll bring us some food." Baekhyun stands up. "Nachos?"

"Yes!" Daehyun exclaims.

"Extra meat, please and a large soda." Chanyeol requests, looking at him with pleading eyes.

"You got it." Baekhyun says before turning around and walking away.

"Are you having fun, appa?" Daehyun asks once they're alone.

"The most fun I've ever had." Chanyeol answers, sincerely.

"Really?" Daehyun looks at him with bright eyes. 

"Absolutely. This is the best birthday ever and you guys gave me the best present." Chanyeol kisses his head.

"The bestest best?" Daehyun asks.Chanyeol nods. "But what about Nini hyung? Did he give you a present?

"Well... not yet." Chanyeol blinks at the sudden question, realizing how he hadn't thought about Jongin the whole day, not sure if he should feel guilty or not.

Now that he thinks about it, all his birthdays with Jongin were always dinner, partying 'til morning and ending up having sex in either one of their apartments. Nothing really different. 

"But I'm sure he will, right?" Daehyun's eyes twinkle.

"I don't know, baby. Nini hyung has been very busy lately. We just talked last night." Chanyeol explains.

"Nini hyung loves you, appa. He told me so." Daehyun slips out, a little distracted with the rubber ball they bought for him at the gift shop as well.

"He... did?" Chanyeol asks, surprised.

Daehyun nods. "He told me you are his best friend. Best friends love each other too, right?" 

Chanyeol blinks.  _ Oh _ . "Oh, yes. Yes, best friends... love each other too." 

"Appa, can I ask you something?"

"Sure, go ahead." Chanyeol encourages him.

"Why aren't you and daddy together? My friend Wooju told me that when two people have a baby, they should be together, like a family. Are we a family? Did daddy lie to me?"

Oh… Chanyeol didn't see that one coming. 

He stays silent for a moment, thinking the right words to say. How can he answer a question like that without confusing his son? How can he answer without feeling like he's lying?

"Well baby, you'll see... sometimes adults do things that we don't want to do, but we do them anyway because we believe we are protecting the people we love." He glances to where Baekhyun is still waiting for their food. "It doesn't mean that it is right or wrong. Say... if you had to lie to protect your daddy, would you do it? Even when you know that lying is wrong?" Daehyun twists his lips before nodding. "And you would do it because you love your daddy and you wouldn't want anything bad to happen to him, right?"

"No." The boy pouts.

"Some families can't be together sometimes, but it doesn't mean they don't love each other. Sometimes… daddies lie too because all they want is the best for their babies."

"Daddy lied to you?" Daehyun tilts his head to the side so he can have a better look at him.

"Well, not really... he just didn't tell me that you were growing in his belly, but he did it because he was scared."

"Scared of what?" 

"Scared of hurting me or you. We are a family, baby, just a little different from the rest. But we love you very much."

"Do you love daddy too?"

It takes Chanyeol a few seconds to reply. He loses himself for a moment while he looks at Baekhyun, the way he smiles at the lady from the burger joint. 

"I..." His thoughts trail off, watching as Baekhyun takes the tray with the food and makes his way to them. 

"Well, that took longer than I expected." Baekhyun huffs as he places the plastic tray on the table and sits down. "Are you guys hungry?"

"Yes!" Daehyun exclaims excitedly, clapping his hands while Baekhyun gets his food ready and forgetting everything they just talked about.

"Yeol?" Baekhyun calls for him, curious. Chanyeol looks a little lost. "Are you okay?"

"Uh... yes. I'm okay." Chanyeol blinks, finally focusing on Baekhyun.

"Are you really that hungry?" Baekhyun teases.

Chanyeol chuckles. "I was just thinking... how about a movie marathon when we get home?"

"Hmm... sounds good." Baekhyun nods, pouring the juice he bought for Daehyun on the plastic cup. "What do you think, baby?" 

"Harry Potter?" Daehyun's eyes light up.

Baekhyun sighs."Sure sweetie, but we can watch other movies too."

"Yes, after Harry Potter is done." Daehyun replies, popping into his mouth a cheesy tortilla chip.

Baekhyun and Chanyeol look at each other, sighing in defeat. Harry Potter will be. 

They didn't even have the chance to get in the petting area, Daehyun had fallen asleep in Chanyeol's arms minutes after their meal. It was time to go home.

"So..." Baekhyun starts, minutes into the ride home "when I was waiting for the food, you and Daehyun seemed to be in a pretty deep conversation." He glances at Chanyeol. "What were you guys talking about?"

"Oh, uh... nothing, Hyunnie just wanted to know if Jongin had given me a present." Well, it's not entirely a lie, Chanyeol thinks.

"Did he?" Baekhyun quirks an eyebrow.

"No." Chanyeol chuckles. "His head has been everywhere lately."

"Right... how is that going, by the way?" 

"Not well. Jongin and his members are still fighting over the group's future." Chanyeol sighs. "But let's not talk about that today, please?"

"Okay." Baekhyun nods. "Seems like this time we'll finally be able to pick the movies." He says as he looks back to see his son softly snoring on his car-seat.

"You think? I think he's going to wake up as soon as we park." Chanyeol snorts.

"I don't feel like watching Harry Potter tonight."

"Me neither." Chanyeol twists his lips.

"We should keep quiet, see if we can take him to bed without waking him." Baekhyun giggles.

Chanyeol smirks, already planning in his head a movie night with Baekhyun alone. This could be the perfect end of a perfect birthday.

"Alright, I'll unbuckle him and you'll take him." Chanyeol mumbles once they're parked on his building. "Ready?" Baekhyun nods.

Carefully, Chanyeol removes the stripes of Daehyun's seatbelts, glancing at Baekhyun every now and then and ready to step away so Baekhyun can do his part.

They manage to successfully bring Daehyun to Chanyeol's apartment without the boy even moving, snoring on Baekhyun's ear and drooling his shirt a little.

Chanyeol helps him through the process, opening and closing doors for him, making sure nothing stands on their way and covering Daehyun's eyes from the bright lights.

"I really need to pee." Baekhyun grumbles as he puts Daehyun on Chanyeol's bed.

"Go, I'll take care of the rest. You can also set up everything for the movie." Chanyeol whispers. Without thinking, Baekhyun nods and is soon out of the bedroom.

Chanyeol chuckles, slowly removing his son's shoes and fixing the pillows around him so he won't fall off the bed. The boy stirs a little, whining while he stretches his legs.

"Appa?" Chanyeol freezes. "Are we home?"

"Sshh." Chanyeol sits next to him. "Yes we are, but it's late. You have to go back to sleep."

"What about the movies?" Daehyun slurs, more asleep than awake.

"We'll do it another day." Chanyeol says, putting the blanket over Daehyun's body. 

"Oki." Daehyun mumbles, turning to lay on his side. 

"Close your eyes." Chanyeol removes the locks of hair falling over Daehyun's eyes. "It was a long day, right?"

Daehyun nods. "'t was fun."

"It was." Chanyeol smiles, stroking his son's hair. "Remember what you asked me earlier?" He asks, swallowing. Daehyun hums. "I do, baby. I do love your daddy, very very much. But it has to be a secret between you and me, okay?"

Daehyun nods slowly, but doesn't answer. He probably won't remember any of this by the morning, but Chanyeol needed to take it out of his chest, even if it doesn't really mean anything. Even when Baekhyun doesn't feel the same. He kisses his son's forehead and stands up, making sure the blanket it's covering him properly before leaving the room.

Baekhyun already has the movie on the TV and a bowl of popcorn on the coffee table.

Chanyeol quirks an eyebrow. "More food? I thought you were full."

"I am, but what's a movie without popcorn." Baekhyun grins, sitting down and patting the place next to him with his hand.

"What movie did you choose?" Chanyeol asks, curious.

"You'll see." Baekhyun giggles, taking the remote to start the movie. 

"Seriously Baek?" Chanyeol blinks. "Mulan?" 

"What? It never gets old!" He exclaims, quickly shutting up upon remembering Daehyun is sleeping.

"Fine." Chanyeol sighs.

Excitedly, Baekhyun gets himself comfortable. 

The movie is not even half through and Baekhyun is already asleep, his head resting on Chanyeol's shoulder. Chanyeol can't help the smile that crosses his face; Baekhyun looks very peaceful when he's sleeping

Fixing his position, Chanyeol enjoys the moment and closes his eyes as well, this might be a moment that is not going to repeat itself in a long while.

Baekhyun shifts his position, snuggling closer. Chanyeol smiles, biting his lower lip. This is something he could get used to.

"Good night, Baek." He mumbles and lets sleep take him away too.


	11. Chapter 11

Christmas... Baekhyun's favorite time of the year: with the cold, the beautiful decorations, the sweets and the feeling of spending time with your loved ones over a cup of hot chocolate in the evenings. It has been a whole new experience for Daehyun as well, having Chanyeol by his side this time; it feels wholesome, seeing them enjoy their father-son time almost everyday, with Chanyeol spending most of his time in Baekhyun's apartment.

Daehyun has been the happiest little boy, but even then, Baekhyun couldn't stop thinking about what would happen next, after Christmas is over and Chanyeol has to go back to New York. He doesn't want to see his baby's heart breaking like his did a long time ago. But for now, he forces himself to push those thoughts away, not wanting to ruin the moment for them with his sour mood. They're picking outfits for tonight's Christmas dinner; they returned that afternoon with bags and more bags of clothes for the three of them.

"Daddy, what is this?" Daehyun asks, picking up a silky piece of garment. 

"That's a vest, baby. You wear it like a jacket." Baekhyun tells him as he looks at himself in the mirror.  _ Not bad _ , he thinks, the way the black jeans hug his thighs and ass. He had gained a little weight during his pregnancy, but really, going to the gym was never an option. So what if he had some fat and rolls here and there, he feels comfortable like this.

"Do I have one? Can I wear it?" Daehyun tilts his head to the side, examining the vest a little closer.

"You do! And yes, let's find a shirt, okay?" Baekhyun says as he approaches the bed, where Daehyun is sitting. He sits by his side and starts looking inside the bags.

Chanyeol walks in at that moment, he has been trying his own clothes in Daehyun's room.

"What do you think?" He grins, extending his arms and slowly turning around for a full view. He's wearing black jeans as well, dress shoes, a black and white striped dress shirt and a black suit jacket. He looks…  _ delicious _ . "Baek?" Chanyeol quirks an eyebrow at the silence.

Baekhyun has been gaping and he's sure as hell he's not being discreet at all. "Good." He shakes his head. "You look really good." It's all he can say.

"Really? Because you don't sound very convinced." Chanyeol feels shy now, he's scratching the back of his neck.

"I'm sure. You look really nice." Baekhyun smiles.

"Good, becauseㅡ" His phone chirping interrupts him. He unlocks the device to find a message from Jongin. "Oh, Jongin says hi."

"Nini hyug?" Daehyun perks up, a smile curling up big on his lips.

Chanyeol hums. "Want to send him a picture?" 

"Yes!" Daehyun starts bouncing on the bed, excited.

Chanyeol approaches his son. Daehyun gets into position and he snaps a photo. Chanyeol sends it to Jongin, who sends hundreds of heart eyes emojis. Minutes later, the photo is up on his Instagram.

Being honest, Chanyeol does miss having Jongin around, but after a lot of struggling with his group's company they had agreed to give them 50% of all the royalties earned since debut. All Jongin wanted was to get out of there so he took it. Half a month ago, a ballet company contacted him to audition for a play; they would be traveling around Europe and two shows in Sydney, Australia. Jongin accepted right away, dancing was always what he really wanted to do.

"How is he doing?" Baekhyun asks. He's now fixing his clothes on hooks to hang them in his closet. 

"Great. He says the ballet company has been treating him better in these past three weeks than his old company in five years." Chanyeol chuckles.

"Must have been hard. But he's now doing what he loves." Baekhyun eyes Chanyeol. He's looking down at his phone, chewing his lower lip. "You miss him, don't you?"

"I… yeah, I do. But I know he's doing well." Chanyeol shrugs. "He says he misses me and Daehyunee too. Tells me everyday to take care of you, guys."

Baekhyun chuckles. "He's a great guy, you know."

"I know. He'sㅡ" Chanyeol's phone chirps again. He stares at the screen for a few seconds, frowning. "I have to go… have to pick up some things for tonight."

"Okay." Baekhyun nods. 

"See you tonight." Chanyeol kisses Daehyun's forehead and unconsciously, Baekhyun's too. "I-I'm sorry." Chanyeol stutters, panicking.

Baekhyun giggles. "It's fine. Don't sweat it."

Chanyeol gives him a sheepish grin before he's heading out of the room and the apartment. 

🔸️

It's late and Chanyeol hasn't come back yet. He sent a message earlier that it will take him longer than expected, but Baekhyun didn't give it so much thought, a few minutes late won't hurt. But now, it's been an hour and Daehyun is already sobbing on the couch, being comforted by Junmyeon because he's appa hasn't showed up yet.

"I swear to God, Chanyeol. If you leave our son hanging I'll make sure you never see him again." Baekhyun records a voice note. Okay, maybe that's a little extreme, but he's pissed and he has all the right to be when his baby is crying in the next room. Chanyeol sees the voice note but doesn't reply.

Baekhyun is fuming. He's going to kill him with his own bare hands, a slow and painful deㅡ

"Appa!" He hears Daehyun's cry from the living room. Baekhyun rushes there to find Chanyeol holding a big cardboard box and a few more gift bags.

"Do you really think an expensive gift will make up for the sour moment you put him through?" Baekhyun crosses his arms against his chest.

"I'm sorry. I really am." Chanyeol's look is apologetic. "I had three errands to run and one of them was taking  _ too damn long _ ." He grits his teeth.

"I don't want to hear your excuses, justㅡ" Baekhyun stops himself when Chanyeol steps aside and standing by the door is Jongdae, also carrying a lot of bags. 

He's looking everywhere but at Baekhyun.

" _ He _ was taking too damn long." Chanyeol rolls his eyes, making his way further into the living room to sit on the couch.

"Uncle Dae!" Daehyun's eyes light up. He runs up to Jongdae and clings to his leg. 

Jongdae laughs, leaving the bags on the floor to pick the boy up. "I missed you so much." He hugs him tight.

"I missed you too." Daehyun has his little arms wrapped around Jongdae's neck.

Baekhyun looks at Chanyeol and then back at Jongdae. He's a little confused, but Chanyeol winks at him and goes back to the conversation with Minseok.

"Hey, baby." Baekhyun approaches him both. "Why don't you go with appa? Uncle Dae and I have to talk."

"Are you coming back?" Daehyun asks.

Jongdae opens his mouth, then closes it again. "If your daddy lets me, sure I will." He gives the boy a little smile.

Jongdae puts Daehyun back on the floor and the bags inside the apartment. Baekhyun asks him to follow him to his room so they can talk in peace.

"Don't be mad at Chanyeol." Jongdae says once they're inside. "I… didn't know if coming was the right choice. I called him just about 30 minutes ago."

" _ You _ called him?" Baekhyun is incredulous.

"Well, he's been insisting for the past two weeks. He wanted me to come and fix things up with you. But I didn't know where we stood after that last fight." Jongdae sighs.

"Yeah… sorry about that punch." Baekhyun bites his lower lip.

"I deserve it. I was being an asshole." Baekhyun hums in agreement. "Anyway, I'm sorry, Baek. For all the bad things I said to you. I was angry and I didn't really mean any of that."

"Didn't you?" Baekhyun is still wary, one part of him wants to just forgive and forget, but the other part is still hurting and unsure. 

"I… okay, I did feel like that back then. Just because I couldn't accept that things were changing and that Daehyun deserved to have his dad with him. I came to realize that it was  _ your _ choice and my feelings shouldn't have meddled. I don't think you used me and I understand now… Chanyeol helped me understand."

"It has been really hard, you know? For me and Daehyun, not having you around."

"It's been twice as hard for me. I was so used to you two. Please forgive me." Jongdae takes a step closer and Baekhyun responds by wrapping his arms around his best friend. "Does that mean I'm forgiven?"

"Yeah, just… let's talk like the grown ups we are next time."

Jongdae chuckles. "Of course."

"Now, are you going to tell me what is in all those bags?" Baekhyun quirks an eyebrow.

"Presents for Daehyun. And for you."

"More toys?" Baekhyun sighs. "It's already hard to get him to sleep."

"Then I think you should  _ really _ worry about Chanyeol's present."

"What? What are you talkㅡ" A scream is heard from outside. Baekhyun panics and runs out. That's his son screaming his lungs out.

Baekhyun expects to find something terrible. Instead, he findsㅡ

"A puppy!" Daehyun is carefully cradling a tiny corgi puppy against his chest. "Daddy! It's a puppy!" He exclaims once he sees Baekhyun. His face is so bright and his eyes are sparkling with so much happiness, Baekhyun can't find it in himself to be actually mad.

"I can see, baby." Baekhyun says as he comes to sit next to Chanyeol on the couch. "A dog? Really?" He grumbles.

"What? He's always wanted one and I think he's ready. We have a very caring son and I know he's going to take really good care of it. Right, Daehyunnie?"

"Yes!"

"But isn't it… too much?" Baekhyun twists his lips.

"Come on, Baek. Look how happy he is." Chanyeol points out. They both turn their eyes to Daehyun, who is softly bopping the puppy's nose. The interaction is the cutest thing he's ever seen and yes, his son looks happy.

Baekhyun is left with no choice but to allow Daehyun to keep the puppy.  _ Draco Malfoy _ , Daehyun decides to name his pet, despite Baekhyun's attempts at convincing him to change it to something more  _ appropriate _ , all in vain. 

Dinner is a nice occurrence. With Chanyeol throwing jokes here and there, answering questions to the guys about his job. Jongdae talks too. A lot. More than what Baekhyun had expected. Tells them what he did while he kept his distance and how he's now chief of nurses at the hospital he works at. Baekhyun proposed a toast for that. 

Aside from the puppy, Chanyeol had brought along a lot more gifts for Daehyun: toys, clothes, movies and an iPad, which Baekhyun would make sure to have complete control over. Jongdae was no different, almost all the bags were for the boy as well; he had brought Lego kits, stuffed toys, Funko Pops, all Harry Potter themed and even a  _ real _ dragon stuffed doll.

"If he becomes a brat when he's older.You guys are gonna handle him." Baekhyun had complained. He was kinda mad, but also, couldn't help but feel his heart swelling with adoration upon seeing his little boy so happy, running from one toy to another, not knowing where to look or what to do with that many stuff.

Nearing 3 in the morning, they decide it's time to leave. They said their goodbyes, Jongdae apologized a few more times and promised to call every now and then, with his new job, free time was now a luxury.

"He's finally fallen asleep." Chanyeol announces as he enters Baekhyun's bedroom; he's sitting on the bed, scrolling through all the pictures they took.

"That was fast." Baekhyun looks up from his phone. 

"I promised him we would take Draco Malfoy to the park later today." Chanyeol sits on the edge of the bed.

Baekhyun sighs. "Okay. Well… we three can spend the day there. A picnic?" He suggests.

"Sounds good." Chanyeol smiles. "I know presents' time it's over, but there is one more thing I want to give you. Actually, this is for the three of us." He says, pulling out a white envelope from the inner pocket of his jacket.

"What is it?" Baekhyun asks, curiously turning the envelope around.

"Open it." Chanyeol encourages him.

Baekhyun does, carefully. "P-plane tickets?" He looks at Chanyeol, eyes wide.

"I… would like you two to go back to the US, for New Year's Eve and the rest of the winter break with me." Chanyeol bites his lower lip.

"W-what?"

"New Year is beautiful in New York. We can go see the Rockefeller tree, there's ice rinks on the squares, light shows… I think it will be a good experience for Daehyun."

"But um… there are tickets to Florida here too." Baekhyun mumbles.

"Yeah. I thought we could take Daehyun to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter, stay a few days in Orlando. You know he will love it andㅡ"

"Wait, Yeol… this is too much. I don't have the money toㅡ"

"You don't have to worry about money. Take it as a gift for four years of Christmases and birthdays missed."

"If you're trying to make me feel badㅡ"

"No! No!" Chanyeol cuts him off, shaking his head furiously. "That's not it, at all. I want to make up for all the time lost. Please, Baek, I want to spend more time with him  _ and _ with you." He pleads.

Baekhyun sighs. "When do we leave?" 

"Iㅡ wait, seriously?" Chanyeol's face lights up.

"Well, you already bought the tickets and… you're right, you deserve that time with Daehyun and I do need vacations, so…"

"Thank you!" And before Baekhyun can process what's going on, he has Chanyeol's arms wrapped around his body in a tight hug.

Baekhyun is tense at first, wanting to pull away, but as his body starts to relax, his arms move on their own to wrap around Chanyeol's neck. 

"I missed this." Chanyeol mumbles, scooting a little closer. "Having you this close."

Baekhyun doesn't say anything. He can't. He only swallows the lump in his throat and pulls Chanyeol closer. Baekhyun missed it too and he wants Chanyeol to know that, but the words still refuse to leave his mouth, afraid of what he could say.

They pull apart a minute later, Baekhyun awkwardly sitting back and Chanyeol looking down at his lap, having a whole hurricane of emotions in his chest.

"I… should get going, then." Chanyeol scratches the back of his neck.

"It's uh… it's late. Why don't you stay here?"

"O-okay." Chanyeol nods. "I'll take the couch."

"N-no. I mean… it's cold out there, you can sleep here, if you want." Baekhyun's eyes grow wide with the realization of what he just said. He already said it, there's no going back.

"Here… on the bed?"

"Y-yeah, it's too big for me alone, there's plenty of space for you to… you know, sleep?" Baekhyun groans internally. He feels like a high school girl about to have sex for the first time ever. Except, he is no school girl and will definitely not be having sex tonight. He wants to be swallowed by the earth and never come back.

"Oh. Uh. Yeah. Okay. But… these jeans and shirt are kind of uncomfortable…"

"Right. Wait." Baekhyun gets off the bed and moves to his closet, taking a plastic basket where he keeps old clothes from when he was pregnant. He manages to find a pair of pants and a large shirt he thinks could fit Chanyeol. "Pregnancy clothes is all I have." He hands Chanyeol the garments awkwardly.

"It's okay. I um… gonna change in the bathroom." Chanyeol announces. He rushes out of the bedroom, leaving Baekhyun to have a mini nervous breakdown on his own.

He grabs one of the pillows and presses it against his face, silently screaming. What was he thinking? Offering Chanyeol to sleep on the same bed? Even if he had the courage to make a move on him, Chanyeol is still with Jongin, he wouldn't dare to damage a relationship. Not when Jongin has been nothing but good to them, to Daehyun.

Chanyeol comes back a few minutes later, seriously considering putting his own clothes back and just sleep like that. Baekhyun bursts out laughing when he sees him walking back in the room, he has to cover his mouth to not wake Daehyun up.

"Don't laugh." Chanyeol puffs his cheeks.

"I'm sorry, it's justㅡ" Baekhyun giggles. The pants are baggy on the stomach and tight around Chanyeol's calves. The shirt is also tight around his shoulders. "I canㅡ I can look for something else."

"Nah, it's fine." Chanyeol shakes his head. He makes his way towards the bed and climbs up.

They both lay on their backs, their hands tightly clasped over their own stomachs in fear of touching by accident; the silence drags on for what it feels like an eternity.

"Um… good night." Baekhyun speaks first.

"Yeah, good night." Chanyeol replies. He closes his eyes.

Chanyeol lets out a small, silent sigh. Baekhyun's smell is everywhere: his clothes, the pillow, the blankets,  _ on _ Baekhyun… it feels like a never ending torture, being so close and not being able to hold him. His heart is beating so aggressively in his chest, he's scared Baekhyun may hear it. Chanyeol rolls over to his side, back to facing Baekhyun.

Time. All he needs is time.


	12. Chapter 12

"Sehun just picked Draco Malfoy up." Chanyeol informs them, hanging up the phone and putting it back in his pocket.

"Did he lock the door?" Baekhyun burrows his eyebrows. Chanyeol chuckles and nods. Baekhyun then sighs, Sehun can be quite easily distracted. "He's still just a puppy. I hope he remembers Daehyunee when we come back." He glances at his son, who's sitting on a carrier provided by the airport. 

"We can call him, right?" Daehyun blinks up at him.

"Of course." Baekhyun smiles, but he's sure that once they arrive in New York and they start touring, he won't even remember about the puppy.

A voice is heard over the speakers of their waiting area, a man announcing it's time to board their flight.

"Ready?" Chanyeol asks, getting on his feet to grab the hand bag with some of their stuff in it. Mostly to keep Daehyun entertained during their 14 hours flight. Baekhyun hopes they'll make it without tantrums and crying.

"Yes." Baekhyun says as he unbuckles Daehyun and picks him up on his arms.

Chanyeol got them first class tickets. Baekhyun is extremely surprised at the difference between coach and this. The seats are huge, big enough for Daehyun to sleep comfortably on it, almost like a bed. They even have a kids' area, only to be used when allowed by the flight crew. The food is amazing and the wine incredible.

"I can't believe you did this." Baekhyun shakes his head. 

"What? It's nice, isn't it?" Chanyeol wriggles his eyebrows, a playful smirk on his lips as he takes a sip of his wine.

"Very. But you didn't have to go all out like this."

"Coach is always cramped. Believe me when I tell you, you  _ don't _ want to spend 14 hours with kids crying and that could possibly trigger Daehyun."

"Well, if you put it that way…"

"Besides, look at him." Chanyeol points at their son, who's entranced on the screen, watching a cartoon movie Baekhyun doesn't really recognize.

"Yeah, okay… just know that you won't be paying for everything." Baekhyun rolls his eyes.

"Butㅡ"

"It's not up for discussions."

"Fine. I'll let you pay for things… sometimes." Chanyeol shrugs.

Well, Baekhyun supposes that is better than nothing. Chanyeol is stubborn and convince him otherwise is going to be difficult.

Daehyun sleeps for the four remaining hours of the flight, only waking up once for a bathroom emergency. The huge time zone difference is probably going to mess up Daehyun's sleeping schedule, they will have to find a way to make it work.

They arrive at JFK at 8 p.m., Daehyun is dozing off in Baekhyun's arms. Chanyeol has to gather their suitcases and find a cart to carry them all. It's freezing outside, so he quickly grabs the blanket from their hand bag and throws it over Daehyun, wrapping it tightly around his sleeping body.

"Holy shit?" Baekhyun grumbles. "It's cold." He shivers and hugs his son tighter against his body.

"Korea it's colder." Chanyeol chuckles. "Come on, Jenny must be waiting for us."

Baekhyun follows Chanyeol closely. The airport is crowded, even with this cold; it's difficult to move around with a child on his arms blocking part of his view range. He's bound to trip a few times. Chanyeol suggests him to stick closer to him.

"Is it always this crowded?" Baekhyun puffs his cheeks.

"Yeah… mostly during this time of the year." Chanyeol looks around, looking for something. "Oh, Jenny is over there. Come on."

Baekhyun frowns, how can Chanyeol see her so easily among all these people? Anyway, he follows until they reach a little less crowded area, Baekhyun feels like he can breathe again.

Chanyeol is chatting animatedly with a girl. She's a few inches shorter than Baekhyun himself, half of her face is covered by a thick purple scarf and the other half covered by her glasses; her long, wavy hair falls over her shoulders and her head is covered by a cute knitted beanie with cat ears on top. She looks pretty even with her face covered.

"Jenny, this is Baekhyun. And this lump here is Daehyunee. You'll meet him when he wakes up." Chanyeol tells her, a proud smile curling up his lips. "Baek, this is Jenny. She's my assistant."

"Hi." Jenny waves at him. Baekhyun can see her eyes smiling through the glasses.

"Hello." Baekhyun replies, doing his best to wave back. "Can we leave, please? I can't feel my arms." He begs.

"You brought my car, right?" Chanyeol asks Jenny.

"Yeah and I got the car seat you asked for." She replies, passing the keys to Chanyeol.

They stop in front of a brand new dark gray Mercedes-Benz G65. Chanyeol deactivates the alarm and proceeds to load their suitcases in the trunk. Baekhyun is in awe.

" _ This _ is your car?" He quirks an eyebrow.

"I wanted it in black, but it would take five months to bring it here and I didn't want to wait." Chanyeol explains, like if it was the most normal thing in the world.

"Oh, right. Because gray sucks, I guess." Baekhyun rolls his eyes.

Chanyeol chuckles. "Here, I'll help you with Hyun." He opens the back door, fixes the car seat and removes the blanket from Daehyun. Baekhyun moves as fast as possible to avoid their son getting unnecessarily colder.

Jenny climbs up in the backseat as well, while Baekhyun takes the passenger seat, despite his insistence of staying in the back with Daehyun. Jenny promises to keep an eye on him.

"He's the cutest baby I've seen." Jenny squeals, squishing her own cheeks since she can't do that with Daehyun's. Yet. "Chanyeol has told me a lot about you two. He sent pics but they really don't make him justice. Oww look at those pouty lips." She's melting. Baekhyun looks at Chanyeol and giggles.

By now, Baekhyun is glad to have taken English in high school and college, since his future career would require it anyway. He never imagined he would need it for a situation like this. At least  _ that _ won't be a problem.

"So… you really are his assistant." Baekhyun quirks an eyebrow, twisting his body to the side a little, so he can see Jenny a little bit better.

"Yeah. I thought he was going to be hell to work with at first. I mean, he looked angry all the time. But then I realized he was just having a hard time adapting."

"Park Chanyeol struggling to adapt? Really?" Baekhyun scoffs.

"I'm here, guys." Chanyeol rolls his eyes. "And yes, new country, new culture. It was hard, but Jenny helped me through; she became my best friend here."

"He used to  _ never _ shut up about this Baekhyun guy. I swear. He even taught me how to say your name properly."

"Really?" Baekhyun asks, cheeks flushing, eyes dreamy.

"Yeah, well…"

"Oh andㅡ"

"Jen!" Chanyeol interrupts before she can say something  _ he _ can regret. "Do you want me to drive you home?"

"Sure. That would be great." Jenny nods her heads. "So, he was really cute when talking about youㅡ"

"Jenny." Chanyeol grits his teeth. She closes her mouth and her eyes widen comically. Baekhyun narrows his eyes, seems like a chat with Jenny would be pretty interesting. "Is Daehyun still asleep?" Chanyeol asks as a cover up.

"Ah, yes. He is." Jenny says, Baekhyun can see through the rearview mirror how embarrassed she looks.

They drop Jenny off at her apartment building 45 minutes later. She shyly says her goodbyes and promises to bring candy for Daehyun tomorrow.

"She's nice. I like her." Baekhyun comments.

"She's the best. She's just… a chatter box sometimes." Chanyeol puffs his cheeks.

"Yeah, what was all that about?" Baekhyun grins.

"What was what?" Chanyeol feigns ignorance, trying too hard to focus on the street in front of them.

"She said… stuff." 

"That was just nonsense. Not important." Chanyeol tries to dismiss the conversation and Baekhyun allows him to. For now, at least.

20 minutes later, they are entering the parking lot of Chanyeol's  _ huge _ apartment building. It's tall. Very tall. Fifty floors, Chanyeol tells him. There are security cameras all over the place, Baekhyun feels weird.

He takes Daehyun in his arms and Chanyeol takes care of their suitcases. Baekhyun follows him to the lobby, where a man with a suit approaches them with quick steps.

"Mr. Chanyeol." He greets politely. "It's good to have you back."

"Hi, Joshua, it's good to be back. This is Baekhyun, he'll be staying with me for a few days. I'll bring his ID tomorrow, if that's alright."

"Excellent, no problem. Welcome, Mr. Baekhyun."

"Thank you." Baekhyun gives the man a smile.

They head for the elevator, once the doors are closed, Baekhyun starts giggling.

"What?" Chanyeol scowls.

"Mr. Chanyeol?"

"I asked him to call me just Chanyeol, he's not allowed to. It's fine." Chanyeol shrugs.

"Well, Mr. Chanyeol, what was your floor again?"

"37." Chanyeol replies, amused at Baekhyun's reaction.

The elevator finally comes to a stop; the doors open to a small lobby, where the door to the actual apartment is. Chanyeol types in the security code and then, they are inside.

Baekhyun blinks non-stop; he's frozen by the door, eyes moving around furiously, because  _ really _ ?

" _ This _ is your apartment?" He doesn't want to sound angry, but he does, even though he's not. He's just… struck.

"Yeah. Why?" Chanyeol is busy letting the suitcases near one of the couches.

"Seriously, how much money do you make?" Baekhyun asks as he finally moves to close the door and walk further inside.

"Why is that important?" Chanyeol scratches the back of his neck.

"So I can sue for child support, of course." The horror on Chanyeol's face is hilarious, he opens his mouth to speak, but Baekhyun laughs, leaving Daehyun, who has awakened now, on the couch. "I'm joking. But really, you must be very good at your job."

Chanyeol nods, proudly. "I'll take you guys to the studio one of these days. Maybe you can even… sing a little?" 

"We can go. But no singing." Baekhyun shakes his head.

"Come on. When was the last time you did it?" Chanyeol sits on the couch next to Daehyun. The boy silently climbs to his father's lap and curls up in there; Chanyeol wraps his arms around him.

"It's been… a while." Baekhyun admits, sitting there as well.

"You can try." Chanyeol shrugs.

"I don't know. We'll see." Baekhyun ends the conversation there. "You made it, didn't you? You always said you wanted to make money out of your dream job and look at all this."

"Yeah… it was hard. When I first got here. People didn't believe in me, you know? They didn't think the  _ asian boy _ could be good."

"Really? That bad?" Baekhyun twists his lips.

"I never said anything, though. I focused on my work and eventually, shut their mouths up. All of their recent hits have been produced by me." A cocky smile curls up on Chanyeol's lips. He looks down at Daehyun and that same smile changes to a softer one; he kisses he's sleeping son's forehead.

"I'm proud of you." Baekhyun's expression is warm. He reaches for Chanyeol's arm and gives it a gentle squeeze.

"It means a lot coming from you." A little snore calls for their attention, Daehyun is asleep again, mouth open and drooling over Chanyeol's shirt. He smiles at his son and then looks at Baekhyun, who has gotten up to look for Daehyun's pajamas. "Yeah, I've made it alright." He mumbles to himself.

"Did you say something?" Baekhyun asks, clothes already in his arms.

"Give me that, I'll do it. You should rest, we have a lot to do tomorrow." Chanyeol tells him, getting on his feet, careful of not waking Daehyun up. "Follow me." They go up the stairs, there are four doors and a lounge with a huge TV near the huge window. Baekhyun is still impressed. "That door is the bathroom." Chanyeol points at the one at the end of the hall. "It's yours and Hyun's, I have my own in my room." Baekhyun nods. "This one is your room and the one in the middle is Daehyun's. That is my room." Chanyeol now points at the last door.

"You think he'll be able to sleep through the night?" Baekhyun asks, worried. They are after, at an unfamiliar place.

"I got us baby monitors. The walls are thin but… just in case." Chanyeol informs him sheepishly.

Baekhyun nods. He tightens the small pile of clothes he has on his hands against his chest, it feels strange, being here, like a huge weight heaving over his shoulders; his stomach feels weird, as well: nervousness? No. Fear, maybe. Fear of expecting too much, of giving Daehyun hopes for something that might not happen. Of giving  _ himself _ hopes for something that might not happen and Baekhyun starts to question if it really was a good idea to come here.

"Baek, you okay?" Baekhyun hears Chanyeol's voice like a noise in the background, only then he realizes he's been staring into nothing. He looks over at Chanyeol, feeling a little out of place. Chanyeol has a worried expression on his face, it makes Baekhyun's heart squeeze.

"Um…" and the words die there. He doesn't know what to answer, because he doesn't know how he really feels. It takes him a moment to regain his thoughts, but before he's truly aware of the words coming out of his mouth, they've already been said. "Can we sleep with you tonight?" 

Now, Baekhyun is not sure where that boldness comes from and he soon realizes his mistake upon seeing Chanyeol's  _ kind of _ shocked face. Baekhyun wants to say to forget it, it's okay, he's a grown man and is not afraid of sleeping alone in an unfamiliar place, except that he is and his emotions are not being helpful right now.

"Yeah." Chanyeol's voice comes out breathy and shaky. Baekhyun notices how the hand holding Daehyun's back tightens.

Baekhyun really wants to facepalm himself, so as soon as they enter Chanyeol's bedroom and he offers to change Daehyun while Baekhyun showers, Baekhyun doesn't think twice. A warm shower should help calm down his racing thoughts and beating heart. For now.

🔸️

Daehyun storms inside the apartment as soon as the door is opened; he squeals and runs around, pulling along with him the animal shaped balloons his parents bought for him at Central Park. A panda and a tiger.

Following behind, Baekhyun and Chanyeol stride inside as well. Baekhyun can't feel his feet and Chanyeol's back is hunched forward, the feeling of thousands of needles pinching his muscles for carrying Daehyun on his shoulders almost all day.

Daehyun seems unbothered, energy boosted up probably for that last blue cotton candy he ate before leaving the park. At the moment, neither of them thought it could trigger their son so much, but then again, they've been indulging Daehyun with all kinds of food and sweets all day.

Baekhyun slumps on the couch with a heavy sigh and allows himself to close his eyes for a moment. He's finally letting his body relax, almost going slack on the comfortable softness of Chanyeol's couch, when he feels a weight dip on the empty seat next to him. Baekhyun wills himself to open his eyes, but before he can act on it, something wet and soft is pressing against his cheek. Baekhyun cracks his eyes open, Daehyun is kneeling next to him, a toothy grin plastered on his face, eyes crinkling brightly with happiness and just like that all tiredness seems to wash away from his body. His baby is saying  _ thank you _ in the purest way he can. Baekhyun doesn't need to hear the words, they're there, written all over his son's face.

Baekhyun smiles and softly grabs Daehyun by the wrist to pull him onto his lap. The boy basks in the attention and snuggles in his dad's chest. Baekhyun leans his head forward and presses his nose against his son's hair, it's a little bit oily and sweaty, but it still smells like his baby shampoo. He inhales deeply, letting his son's scent fill his senses; Baekhyun forgets for a second where they are and who they're with.

Baekhyun opens his eyes again to find Chanyeol standing just a few steps away from them, arms behind his back and such a fond look in his eyes, Baekhyun feels momentarily embarrassed. Chanyeol opens his mouth to speak, but he's silenced by the blasting sound of his ringtone. He frowns, pulling his phone out of his pocket and stares at the screen, the scowl on his eyebrows easing away.

"It's Jongin." Chanyeol announces. "I'm going to," he points at the terrace. Baekhyun only nods.

"You and I," Baekhyun speaks to his son once Chanyeol is out "are going to take a shower."

Daehyun groans. "Do we have to?"

"Most definitely." Baekhyun holds back a laugh, seeing as the smudges of dirt remain on Daehyun's face after he rolled around in the playground's grass area.

Aside from that, he wants to give Chanyeol a sense of privacy, instead of the feeling that someone might be eavesdropping crawling up his back. Baekhyun gives one last glance to the terrace before going up stairs.

"Hey." Chanyeol answers the call, a small smile curling up his lips. 

" _ Hey _ ." Jongin says back and it sounds kind of down. It prickles in Chanyeol's stomach, but he doesn't ask. Not yet. " _ I've been meaning to call you. Also, I'm sorry for not replying to all your messages _ ." A tired sigh is heard from the other side of the line.

"It's alright. I know you've been busy." Chanyeol shakes his head, dismissing the possible guilt on the other.

" _ Still _ ." And there it is, the underlying tone in Jongin's voice that tells Chanyeol something has been bothering him lately. Chanyeol can feel it too, but he's been trying to push those thoughts to the back of his head. 

Just now, as neither of them says anything and the silence stretches like a rubber band to an almost breaking point, Chanyeol realizes that yes, this is what has been going around in his head for weeks now. A  _ breaking point.  _ With Jongin getting busier as days passed by and Chanyeol spending every possible minute with his son ㅡand Baekhyunㅡ, their relationship has finally spiraled down the bottomless and inevitable pit of a long-distance relationship. They saw it coming.

"Isn't like… very early in the morning where you are right now?" Chanyeol is the one to break the silence, a light question bathed in a light tone to ease the growing tension.

He hears Jongin chuckle. " _ Yeah. I have to be at the studio in about an hour. I thought I could use that time to talk to you _ ."

"Okay…" Chanyeol didn't mean to sound so scared, because he isn't, really, but as a reflection of his emotions mixing up together, he can't help it. "I hear you."

" _ So… the Academy offered me a permanent position on their line-up. I said yes _ ." 

"That's great!" Chanyeol exclaims, genuine happiness wrapping around his words. However, the feeling that Jongin had more than that to say sinks in his stomach.

Jongin lets out a long, dragged sigh and waits for a moment before he starts speaking again. " _ I don't intend to stretch this any longer, Yeol. _ " Chanyeol knows, by now, it's already inevitable. " _ I think… we should break up _ ." 

There, he said it and although Chanyeol was expecting it, it didn't stop his heart from squeezing at the straightforwardness. Well, it's not like he would have liked a long speech on the  _ why, _ because he already knows why and so does Jongin. 

"Yeah, I think… we should." The words come out slowly, but loud enough for Jongin to hear. Chanyeol doesn't miss the sigh of relief that leaves his now ex-boyfriend's mouth.

" _ We can still be friends… right? _ " 

If Chanyeol were someone else or if their situation was different from this, he would have hated that question; after all, is not what you want to hear after breaking up with someone, but for Chanyeol, it feels strangely… good. It gives him a sense of peace and calmness, warming his chest. 

"I'd love that." Chanyeol smiles. 

There's silence again. Chanyeol stares at the tall buildings in front of him, the sun has already set down and the cold wind sips through his skin, making him shiver.

" _ Chanyeol? _ " Jongin calls his name after what it felt like a long time. 

"Yeah?" It comes out breathy, the temperature is starting to drop, the gray clouds move across the sky, it might snow tonight.

" _ Take care of your family. Talk to Baekhyun. Make them happy _ ." At that, Chanyeol's heart beats faster than he ever thought possible. " _ They deserve it. You deserve it _ ."

The first snowflake lands on the back of his hand. Chanyeol shivers at how cold such a tiny flake can feel. "Thank you, Jongin."

" _ I'll see you soon _ ." 

And with that, the call ends. Chanyeol stands there, looking at the black screen for a minute more, another smile spreading across his lips. From all the outcomes, he didn't expect for this to be the one to give him peace of mind.

With a sigh, Chanyeol goes back inside his apartment. Baekhyun is in the kitchen, with his back to the terrace window, damp hair sticking out everywhere and wearing that set of pajamas with rainbows and clouds prints Chanyeol bought for him as a Christmas  _ joke. _ He can't help the grin forming on the corner of his mouth as he approaches the kitchen island. Chanyeol tries his best to shake off any trace of emotion on his face that could give away what just happened.

"Cute." Chanyeol speaks. Baekhyun startles, his hand almost losing grip around the electric kettle. Baekhyun turns at him, cheeks puffed in annoyance and a scowl twisting his features; his face softens, though, as he focuses his eyes on Chanyeol.

"Everything okay?" 

The question takes Chanyeol by surprise. "Uh?" He blinks a few times, noticing Baekhyun's narrowed eyes directed at him.

"Something's bothering you." Baekhyun brings his mug of steaming tea to the front, he pours honey into the cup and stirs, all the while keeping his gaze fixated on Chanyeol.

Chanyeol sighs, leave it to Baekhyun to always  _ know.  _ He figures there's no point in keeping it from Baekhyun, anyway. "Jongin, he… took a permanent place at the academy."

"Oh… that's great?" Baekhyun grimaces, he didn't intend to make it sound like a question, but it's being a little difficult right now for him to decide if the expression on Chanyeol's face is joy or sorrow. He's smiling, but the crease of his brows remains wrinkled. 

"He also broke up with me." Chanyeol drops and Baekhyun has to halt on his steps.

"Oh… Yeol, Iㅡ"

Chanyeol shakes his head. "You don't have to say anything. It was mutual." 

"Want some tea?" Baekhyun asks instead, going back to the kitchen to quickly fix another mug, not waiting for an answer.

They sit on the couch. Baekhyun allows Chanyeol to lean on his side as the only sound in the room becomes the occasional clinking of the spoon against the porcelain of the mug.

After the drinks are gone, Chanyeol shifts his position, leaving his mug on the coffee table to lay on his side, head resting over Baekhyun's lap. For a moment, Baekhyun doesn't know what to do, eyes wide looking as Chanyeol's hand grips on his knee. He relaxes after a minute, leaving his own mug next to Chanyeol's and brings one hand to the taller's head, to run his fingers through his hair, while the other rests on his upper arm.

The silence remains. There's nothing Baekhyun could say right now anyway and Chanyeol needs the quiet moment to organize his thoughts. He lets himself enjoy the feeling of Baekhyun's fingers massaging his scalp and closes his eyes, a contented but silent sigh leaves his lips; if only he could stay like this forever, he wouldn't mind, but there's a reality to face. A reality that now, gives him a small sense of hope.

🔹

The night is cold. Baekhyun shivers as they walk down the street, doing their best to make their way through the crowd of people without bumping or tripping. 

Small balls of snow fall from the sky at a slow pace, making themselves comfortable on top of Baekhyun's head and shoulders. He's pressed against Chanyeol's side, hand holding onto his jacket in a fitful attempt of not losing him and his son amongst the crowd. Daehyun doesn't seem to care about the increasing number of people around them as he sits safely on Chanyeol's arms, arms wrapped around his father's neck.

Daehyun doesn't know where to look, lost in the mix of people and lights and luminous ads that brighten up Times Square. He's smiling brightly, excited at being able to visit many places he didn't know before.

"We should move to the sidewalk, there's less people there." Chanyeol suggests, pointing at an opened path people had unconsciously and miraculously made. Baekhyun nods, his grip on Chanyeol's jacket tightens as he's being pulled away from the suffocating crowd. "Do you think we should go home?" Chanyeol asks once they're leaning against the wall of a building.

Baekhyun glances at his son, who's still looking around, amazed. He shakes his head. "Not yet. As long as Daehyun doesn't feel uncomfortable, we'll be fine."

Chanyeol nods, then gestures with his head for Baekhyun to follow. The Rockefeller Center is not that far from where they are, but with all that people around, it is going to take more time than usual to get there.

Fifteen minutes later, they finally arrive. Baekhyun allows himself to breathe. There are less people here, with the main attraction not being entirely lighted up yet, but Baekhyun still looks up at the ridiculously tall Christmas tree in amazement; a few fairy lights twinkle here and there around the green foliage. The glass ornaments reflect the lights, creating a pretty spectre of color in the air.

The Rockefeller tree is more beautiful in person, Baekhyun thinks. He's seen it several times on TV and the internet, but nothing compares with the feeling of standing right below it. There's warmth growing inside him, and maybe it's the Holidays or maybe it's the fact that he's holding his son's little right hand on his and right next to him, is Chanyeol, presser against his body, unconsciously leaning towards him a little. They're both looking up, fascinated, the lights twinkling in their eyes. Baekhyun is sure Chanyeol has seen this a thousand times, but the excitement and the fascination are real. 

A tiny smile spreads on Baekhyun's lips, that ticklish feeling inside him is comfortable and it feels just right to be here, like a real  _ family.  _ Like it should have been since the beginning.

"Appa! Appa!" Daehyun's calls bring him back from his thoughts. He didn't notice the moment Daehyun had let go off of his hand to stretch his arms at Chanyeol, asking to be picked up.

Chanyeol does without hesitation, lifting their son so he can sit him on his shoulders, one leg on each side of his neck. Baekhyun chuckles, he can only imagine how wonderful the world must look for a little boy from up there. Baekhyun is so entranced on the show of lights that he doesn't feel when Chanyeol sneakily wraps his gloved hand around his, until he's firmly secure there.

"I don't want to lose you." Chanyeol says. Baekhyun feels the weight of those words in his chest, he knows what Chanyeol means, but he can't help but  _ hope _ . He's stunned for a moment and he only manages to nod his head once. Chanyeol smiles at him and goes back to admiring their surroundings.

Unconsciously and attracted by the warmth radiating from Chanyeol's body, Baekhyun gets even closer, his chest tightly pressed against his arm. Chanyeol doesn't question him and only squeezes his hand tighter.

🔸️

"He's asleep already." Baekhyun announces as he makes his way into the living room, wrapping his cardigan around his body. The apartment is warm, but Baekhyun's body has a hard time warming up.

"Good." Chanyeol, who's standing by the huge window looks at him from over his shoulder, smiling. 

Baekhyun comes to stand next to him, the city lights are beautiful and the clouds in the night sky announce another storm tonight. None of them speak for about five minutes, until they both decide it's time to break the silence.

"Iㅡ" They both say at the same time, laughing at the coincidence.

"You go first." Chanyeol says.

"I just… wanted to thank you. You know… for bringing us here, with you. It was a beautiful night."

A tiny smile curls up on Chanyeol's lips. "I'm happy you two are here. It's nice to feel like a family, if you don't mind me saying." He lowers his head, but the smile doesn't disappear. 

"No, Iㅡ I like the feeling, too." _Too much_ , he admits to himself.

"Baekㅡ" Chanyeol stops the flow of his words abruptly because… what does he really want to say? He turns his whole body around to face Baekhyun better. Baekhyun blinks, the expression on Chanyeol's face is so full of unreadable emotions, his eyes are glassy, his lower lip trembles as he opens his mouth to let the heavy air in his chest out; suddenly, Baekhyun feels like the air is missing from his lungs. "I don't think I can do this anymore. Not like this, Iㅡ"

Baekhyun doesn't know where that courage came from as he pulls Chanyeol in for a kiss, grabbing him by the cheeks. It's just a press of their lips, but when they pull apart, they're breathless.

Panic starts rising in Baekhyun and je scrambles back a little. His heart might stop beating at any moment now. "I'mㅡ I'm sorry. I shouldn't haveㅡ you just got out of a relationship and Iㅡ"

Chanyeol's eyes darken. He closes the distance that separates him, grabbing Baekhyun by the arm and pulling him flush against his chest. Before Baekhyun can open his mouth to complain, they're kissing again. This time, Baekhyun moves his lips with Chanyeol's in a frenzied manner, fast and sloppy; he clings onto the taller's neck while Chanyeol pulls him impossibly closer by the waist. It's messy and loud, kind of painful by the way their teeth clash and scrap on their lips, but they are unable to care as their bodies warm up to each other. As all that accumulated tension over the years finally flows free through their veins.

"It'sㅡ the windowㅡ" Baekhyun pants from where Chanyeol has laid him on the couch. Unconsciously, he spreads his legs further for Chanyeol to fit in between.

"We're on the 37th floor, I assure you no one is watching." Chanyeol says, breathless, hovering above him, before diving back in, this time attaching his lips to Baekhyun's neck. "Are you sure about this?" He asks, trailing kisses up his neck, chin, cheeks and finally, his lips again.

"Yeah. It's been so long. I want you." Baekhyun nods, letting his hands wander inside Chanyeol's shirt, up his chest.

It's slow and sweet. Chanyeol moves inside him with all the care in the world and Baekhyun caves in the lingering kisses Chanyeol presses on his neck, his collarbones and shoulders. His body is suddenly on fire, all traces of cold now gone. 

Feeling Chanyeol's hands on him is a sensation hard to describe and it's as wonderful as it is arousing. His arms are wrapped around Chanyeol's back and his legs around his hips, giving the taller an all-access pass into his body.

"Chanyeolㅡ" Baekhyun breathes out, feeling him go deeper and reach places he didn't even know could be reached. "Ah!" Baekhyun moans, head rolling back as a particularly hard thrust pushes his body forward. "Yeol, Iㅡ Iㅡ"

"I love you, Baek." Chanyeol says without thinking, just feeling. At the realization of his own words, he hides his face in the crook of Baekhyun's neck and groans. 

Baekhyun's eyes are wide in surprise and it takes him a moment to process the sudden confession. He then forces Chanyeol to look at him, a small whine abandons his lips as their bodies rock back and forth. "I love you." Baekhyun repeats, hands squeezing Chanyeol's cheeks. He stares into the other's eyes, trying to convey all the words his mouth would not speak. Chanyeol kisses him hard again, speeding his thrusts.

Baekhyun cums minutes later, with Chanyeol doing the same soon after.

"Well… fuck." Baekhyun mumbles as he lays there, eyes fixed on the ceiling and one arm resting over his forehead. He can feel Chanyeol's hot body pressed to his side.

"Yeah. Fuck." Chanyeol repeats with a sigh.

Now that is over, Baekhyun is not sure if what they did was right. He doesn't even know what's gonna happen once they return to Seoul and definitely, it doesn't exactly mean that things are going to change between them. Even if he hopes they will, he knows it's not that easy.

The silence that surrounds them is deafening. Baekhyun's thoughts run wild in his head, but that doesn't stop Chanyeol from falling asleep minutes later. Baekhyun gets up, careful not to wake the other up and takes the moment as his chance to run to the shower. He's not gonna lay on the same bed as his son after having sex.

🔸️

Chanyeol wakes up alone and cold. His whole body is sore and his head is throbbing. He notices that, folded on the coffee table, there's a pair of sweatpants, a sweatshirt and clean underwear, but Baekhyun is nowhere to be seen. He dresses before Daehyun comes in and finds him naked.

Baekhyun comes out while he's putting on the sweatshirt, a long cardigan and his fluffy slippers on.

"Good morning." He greets with a lopsided smile.

Chanyeol's however, is huge. He makes his way towards Baekhyun and tries to wrap his arms around him, only to be stopped by him.

"Baek?" Chanyeol is so confused.

Baekhyun sighs. "Listen, Yeol… what happened last night… I don't think it should've happenedㅡ"

"What? Why not? You told me you love me andㅡ"

"I know and I  _ do.  _ I do love you, butㅡ we don't know if this is going to work. You're here and we're in Seoul."

"We don't know if it's going to work if we don't  _ try. _ All I ask is one chance, Baek. For me, for you, for our son. For  _ us _ ." Chanyeol is starting to sound desperate.

"A… long distance relationship? I don't knowㅡ" Baekhyun takes a step back.

"Give me two months to figure this out. I promise you, I won't fail you or Hyunㅡ"

"Appa?" Daehyun shows up, dragging his dragon toy on one hand and his dinosaur in the other. "I'm hungry."

"Good morning." Baekhyun rushes to his son, taking him by the hand for him to join them.

"Morning." Daehyun giggles.

"Did you sleep well?" Chanyeol approaches them and kisses Daehyun on the forehead, then points at his own cheek for his son to return the kiss.

"We'll finish this conversation later." Baekhyun tells him, then heads to the kitchen to start with breakfast.

They are peacefully eating. Chanyeol playfully feeds Daehyun his eggs and it's so familiar, so warm that Baekhyun can't stop himself from thinking that yes, he would like to have this every morning. Waking up to Chanyeol next to him and seeing Daehyun this happy every day. He  _ wants _ a family, he wants this to work.

"Two months." Baekhyun suddenly says. Chanyeol stops the spoon that was about to go into Daehyun's mouth and looks at Baekhyun. "That'sㅡ that's all I can give you." Baekhyun looks down to his still full plate. "After that, if we can't… we'll figure something out if you still want to see Daehyun, butㅡ"

"I promise you won't regret it." Chanyeol cuts him off, nodding effusively. "Thank you."

"Iㅡ" Baekhyun is interrupted by the door bell ringing. "Are you expecting someone?" He frowns.

"No. I gave Jenny the day off. She wanted to spend the holiday with her boyfriend." Chanyeol explains while standing up, estranged. He makes his way to the door and opens it without looking at the intercom screen.

His blood runs up to his brain so fast, Chanyeol feels a little dizzy all of a sudden.

"Why didn't you tell me you were back?" The shrilling, high-pitched voice echoes through the apartment. She makes her way inside, brushing past him with a small push.

"Leah." Chanyeol quickly follows. This can't be good. Not right now. 

"I had to find out through your assistant's Instagram story, really?" Her heels are clicking loudly on the hardwood floor and it's the most annoying thing Chanyeol has had to endure.

"Well, that should have been the first clue that I  _ didn't _ want you to find out." Chanyeol rolls his eyes. He follows her to the living room, where she plops down on the couch, crossing her legs. "You need to leave, Leah."

"Why? I thought you would miss me." She says, looking up at him, pink lips stretching on a wide smile.

"I didn'tㅡ"

"Yeol?" Baekhyun makes his way into the living room as well, a little confused by the sudden ruckus. 

"Baek, uh…"

"Oh, you brought a friend from Korea? He-llo, my na-me is Le-ah." She starts speaking, separating the syllables, sounding a little retarded.

"Hi, I'm Baekhyun." Baekhyun speaks, trying to keep his cool. He wants to roll his eyes so hard.

"You understand English, great. That could have been exhausting." Leah lets out a long sigh. 

"Leah, you need to leave." Chanyeol rubs his forehead with his palm.

"You are being very rude, sweetheart. That's no way of treating your girlfriend. Much less on New Year's Eve. Besides, I'm throwing a party tonight and obviously you're gonna be there."

Chanyeol looks at Baekhyun with eyes open wide in horror. Baekhyun stands there, frozen, arms on his sides; he's looking between Chanyeol and Leah, confused still and trying to figure out what is actually going on.

"No, no, no." Chanyeol rushes to say. "I've told you many times already. We dated, for a month. Two and a half years ago. It's over." He explains, making sure Baekhyun is listening.

"Right, then you met Jongin, blah blah blah. Anyway, the partyㅡ"

"No, Leah." Chanyeol cuts her off. "Baekhyun is not my friend. He's my boyfriend. And I would like to spend this holiday with my family."

Leah scoffs. "A boyfriend is not family. He can come too, if he wants. I don't mind." She speaks, waving her hand dismissively, as if Baekhyun wasn't there.

"You don't understand, Iㅡ"

"Appa? Daddy?" Daehyun's tiny voice makes Chanyeol's heart drop in fear. "Is breakfast over?" The boy stomps his way into the living room, annoyed for being left alone in the middle of breakfast. 

Daehyun attempts to go to Chanyeol, arms already stretched for his appa to pick him up, not noticing the stranger sitting on the couch.

"No." Baekhyun reaches for him, picking him up instead. 

"My family." Chanyeol points out, referring to Baekhyun and Daehyun.

Leah looks confused for a moment before understanding. She starts laughing. " _ That _ is your son? Wait, I saw him on Kai's Instagram, I thought he was just that nephew he never shuts up about." She shrugs.

"I don't wanna do this right now. I'm not gonna ask you again, Leah.  _ Leave _ ."

"Fine." She rolls her eyes and stands up. "But I'll come back. We have a lot to catch up on." Leah moves closer to Chanyeol, she opens her arms, ready to wrap them around Chanyeol. He moves away just in time, making Leah chuckle. "Bye, sweetie." She blows a kiss and then, completely disregarding Baekhyun and Daehyun's presence, she leaves.

"Baekㅡ"

Baekhyun has a deep frown on his face. Without words, he turns around and goes back to the kitchen. Chanyeol sighs and follows. It was going  _ so _ well.

"Anything else that you may be hiding from me?" He furiously cuts a strawberry in half to feed it to Daehyun. 

"No, because I'm not hiding anything. Like I said, we dated for a month, a year and a half after I got here. If I never told you anything it's because it didn't really mean anything to me. We worked together, I produced some of her songs. She was nice at first, sweet, kind even, but after a few months she started to show who she really was. And I swear she drove me crazy." Chanyeol sighs. "I swear I would not lie to you. Not in front of our son, not ever."

Well, in that, Chanyeol is right. He's never lied to him before and Baekhyun appreciates it.

"What you said…" Baekhyun finally speaks a moment later "about me being your boyfriend. Did you mean it?" Baekhyun bites his lips.

Chanyeol's cheeks flush. "Yeah. I mean… if you want to. Do you want to be my boyfriend?" 

Baekhyun chuckles. "It feels like we are doing everything backwards. We have a child together."

"Funny, huh? How things worked out. But… you didn't answer my question." Chanyeol quirks an eyebrow. He sneakily grabs the hand Baekhyun has resting on his thigh and laces their fingers.

"Yeah… I suppose we can do the boyfriends thing." Baekhyun winks. 

"Should we tell…" Chanyeol looks at Daehyun, who's happily munching on his food, not really paying attention to what his parents are saying, and then up at Baekhyun.

"Let's wait a couple of days and see how this works out first."

"Yeah, okay. Whatever you say." The smile on Chanyeol's face is so bright and his eyes are sparkling, Baekhyun feels like kissing the life out of him.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just one for today. Please don't kill me.

It's still unclear for Baekhyun how he ended up like this, trapped between his boyfriend and the kitchen counter, with Chanyeol pressed against his back, hands gripping on his hips and mouth sucking and leaving wet trails all the way up from his shoulder to the back of his ear.

The hold of Baekhyun's hand around the knife he was using to chop vegetables just minutes ago is tight, his eyes are closed and his lower lip trapped between his teeth as he tries to resist the urge to just  _ give in _ and let Chanyeol do whatever he wants with him, but is such an inopportune moment  _ and _ place. They still have a lot to do if they want to have dinner ready in time for tonight.

"We have things to do." Baekhyun breathes out, tilting his head to the side to give Chanyeol more space to leave red marks on his skin, his actions contradicting his own words. Chanyeol doesn't say anything and only presses closer, letting Baekhyun know that marinating steaks is not exactly what he would like to be doing right now. Baekhyun gasps, feeling the hardness against his backside. "Daeㅡ Daehyun could wa-wake up at any… moment." He lets out a small moan as Chanyeol's right hand slides from his hip to his stomach, slipping under his shirt.

"Baby monitor will let us know." Chanyeol mumbles on his ear to then proceed to lick a fat stripe all across his ear-shell. 

Baekhyun trembles, knees going weak and threatening to let him fall if he doesn't support himself on something right now. The knife falls onto the marble counter with a loud clank.

"Chanㅡ the foodㅡ" Baekhyun lurches forward with a groan when Chanyeol grinds on him. Baekhyun keeps his eyes closed, lips tightly pressed on a thin line. His self-control is quickly slipping out of his hands.

"Do you have any idea" Chanyeol speaks, deep voice filling Baekhyun's senses "of how hot you look right now?"

"I'm chopping vegetables." The words break at some point and Baekhyun curses at himself for not having more determination to push Chanyeol away and continue with what he's doing.

"Still hot." Chanyeol says and Baekhyun can hear the grin on his voice; he knows he's won.

_ To hell with food _ , Baekhyun thinks, turning around to pull Chanyeol in for a bruising kiss, messy and desperate. Chanyeol grinds his clothed erection on Baekhyun's, the roughness of his jeans creating a delicious friction through the sweatpants Baekhyun is wearing. 

"Not here. Your room." Baekhyun pants, stopping Chanyeol from getting his hands inside his sweatpants. Chanyeol smirks, hauling Baekhyun up and forcing him to wrap his legs around his hips to not fall. Baekhyun manages to snatch the baby monitor away with him before they leave the kitchen.

~

"I hate you." Baekhyun says, chest still moving up and down, trying to regulate his heavy breathing. He stares at the ceiling, regretting ㅡnot reallyㅡ his decisions in life.

Chanyeol lies on his side, fingers slowly trailing up and down his soiled stomach. "I know."

Baekhyun rolls his eyes. "If we get up now, we can still finish dinner on time." He attempts to remove the thin white sheet that covers his lower naked body so he can get up, only to be stopped by a whole Chanyeol draping himself around him, refusing to move. It should be uncomfortable, with how sticky their skin feels, sweat and… other things. "Chan…" Baekhyun shakes him softly. Chanyeol groans. "Get up."

"No." He shakes his head, to then bury his face on Baekhyun's chest. Baekhyun giggles, Chanyeol's breathing tickling his cold skin.

"The foodㅡ"

"Forget about the food." Chanyeol speaks, voice muffled by Baekhyun's chest. He opens his mouth to protest. "We can just order something."

"Order… something?" Baekhyun quirks an eyebrow. "On New Year's eve, on such a short notice?"

Chanyeol hums. "I know a place."

"Of course you do."

"Let's just stay like this a while longer." Chanyeol scoots closet, rubbing his nose against Baekhyun's skin for good measure; he wants Baekhyun to know he's comfortable there.

They stay silent for a while, Chanyeol with his eyes closed, allowing himself to relax to the steady beating of Baekhyun's heart. Baekhyun runs his fingers up and down Chanyeol's back.

"Yeol…" Baekhyun mumbles. Chanyeol hums, letting him now he's listening. "Would you tell me a little more about your… relationship with Leah?" 

At that, Chanyeol tenses a little, but he relaxes just as fast. "Why would you want to know that?" He asks, not lifting his head, but pressing himself closer, if possible.

Chanyeol feels Baekhyun shrug. "I'm curious about you ended up dating her. I mean, she does seem like… a lot."

Chanyeol sighs, rolling over onto his back next to Baekhyun so he could speak properly. "Well… we met at the label, as you know. During the time we spent together when working on the first album I produced for her, she seemed like a really nice person. She was polite with everyone around her, sweet and… caring, even. I guess I never noticed everyone's true behavior when Leah was around because I was impressed that someone with her fame could be so humble." Chanyeol snorts at his own words. "And she was cute, so maybe… I thought she could help me settle down here, you know, having someone who could guide me through this whole new country. But after the first two weeks, that sweet girl was gone. I thought it was the stress of her new album coming out, promotions and stuff; oh, I was so wrong…" Chanyeol chuckles and shakes his head. "But why are you really interested in that?" Baekhyun shrugs, averting his eyes. "Baekhyun…" Chanyeol says his name, his tone of  _ you better speak or... _ sending chills down his spine.

"Okay, well, even when it physically pains me saying it." Baekhyun sighs. "Leah is interesting, her life, her career… same with Jongin and then, there's me. Boring me."

"What?" Chanyeol asks, confused.

"I mean…  _ that _ . I'm boring compared to them. Why would you like me when you can have someone way more interesting andㅡ" 

"Baekhyun, shut up." Chanyeol cuts him off, an annoyed frown forming on his eyebrows. "You are all different, so I have no right to compare. Yes, they have exciting lives but… but no one has made me feel the way you do." He speaks, moving so he can now hover over Baekhyun. Chanyeol grabs his hand and presses it over his chest, where his heart beats wildly. "This is what you do to me." Baekhyun blinks at the warm feeling on his palm. "I don't want you to doubt that I /adore/ you… ever again."

Overwhelmed by the sudden wave of emotions washing over his entire being, Baekhyun nods, eyes wide and breathless, unable to speak. Chanyeol licks his lips, letting go of Baekhyun's hand over his chest so he can lean in and kiss him, but as he's about to join their lips, a series of little whines are heard through the baby monitor. Chanyeol chuckles.

"I'll go. You take care of the food." Baekhyun tells him as he gets up and starts dressing. Chanyeol is doing the same when he feels the bed moving and then, wet lips pressing on his cheek. "I love you." He says.

When Chanyeol finishes processing the moment and looks up, Baekhyun is already gone. He smiles, more than encouraged to do as he's being told.

****

Daehyun always thought that his whole life, it was going to be only him and his daddy. Uncle Jongdae, maybe, but not someone else who he could share the things he loves the most with.

But then, Park Chanyeol appeared and Daehyun felt his life tilting upside down, filling with life and a feeling he couldn't truly understand at his young age; even before knowing who Park Chanyeol really was, Daehyun already knew he  _ wanted  _ him and that is why he let him hold Min the first day they met.

And now, as they sit in appa's bed, wrapped in blankets and pillows while they watch an American movie about Christmas, Daehyun knows he couldn't ask for more. Daddy plays with his hair and appa feeds him popcorn; daddy and appa look at each other and smile, sometimes, when they think Daehyun is not paying attention, they kiss on the lips, just like his friends said their parents do, which means they love each other and that they are a family again, aren't they?

Even then, Daehyun still pretends to not notice, maybe daddy and appa are too shy to kiss in front of him, and so, remembering what Nini hyung told him once:  _ you must be patient, good things sometimes take time _ , Daehyun doesn't really know what that means, but being patient is something even his teachers have taught him, so it must be one of those good things. So Daehyun decides that he can be patient and wait for daddy and appa to kiss in front of him and they can buy a cake and celebrate that they are finally together.

Daehyun falls asleep twenty minutes before the movie ends, enjoying the warmth of having his parents close to him, holding him, loving him.

"Should we move him?" Baekhyun whispers.

Chanyeol shakes his head. "Let's put on a pillow barrier and go outside." He whispers back.

Baekhyun nods in agreement and shield Daehyun with all the pillows they can find before heading out to the living room, where the night sky is visible through the floor to ceiling window. The moon light is shaded by the gray clouds announcing that soon, snow will fall again.

Baekhyun stands by the window, observing the city lights blinking in the distance. The buildings shimmering and full of life. Chanyeol approaches him then, offering a glass of wine and then wrapping his arm around his waist.

"Thank you." Baekhyun smiles, receiving a kiss on the cheek. 

"You okay?" Chanyeol asks, resting his chin atop Baekhyun's head.

"Hm… why?"

"You're very quiet." 

"I'm fine, just… thinking about the future." Baekhyun lets out a small sigh.

"Don't worry about it. I promised you I was going to figure it out, didn't I?" Baekhyun nods. "Baek, do you trust me?"

Baekhyun turns around in Chanyeol's arms. "Of course I trust you. I know we're going to make it work."

"We will and when the time to be apart for a while comes, I want you to keep that trust. There's no way I'm leaving the two of you alone again." Chanyeol mumbles, lips pressed against Baekhyun's forehead. "Let's enjoy our time, okay? As a family."

"Okay." Baekhyun nods, pulling Chanyeol closer. "I love you."

"I love you." Chanyeol says back, leaning in to leave a small kiss on Baekhyun's lips. "It's almost midnight."

Baekhyun thinks. "You already kissed me."

"I can kiss you again." Chanyeol ducks in again, only to be stopped by Baekhyun pressing a finger against his lips. Chanyeol raises a questioning eyebrow.

"New Year's Eve midnight kisses are  _ so  _ overrated." Baekhyun wets his lips. Chanyeol follows the movement of his boyfriend's tongue with his eyes.

"So… what do you suggest?" Chanyeol's hold around Baekhyun's waist tightens. Baekhyun throws an obvious glance at the very inviting couch. "Oh?" 

Baekhyun leaves both glasses on the floor and before Chanyeol can say anything else, he's being pushed down the couch, with Baekhyun straddling his hips.

"We should really" Baekhyun speaks in between the kisses he leaves on Chanyeol's jaw, neck, cheeks and lips "stop doing this in the living room." He gasps when Chanyeol's hands move up to grop at his ass.

"Your son sleeps like the dead." Chanyeol moans as Baekhyun begins a slow back and forth motion with his hips. 

"He's  _ my  _ son now?" 

Baekhyun drags his hips; Chanyeol's cock trapped in between his cheeks, their pajama pants the only thing in between and making them both gasp and moan.

"Maybe we should… stop talking about our son in moments like this." Chanyeol marks his words by bucking his hips up.

Baekhyun muffles a moan with one hand, the othee supporting his weight on Chanyeol's chest.

"Let's just… pull our pants down and get inside me." Baekhyun speaks breathlessly.

"Butㅡ"

Baekhyun leans down, lips pressing against Chanyeol's ear. "Remember my fifteen minutes shower?" He purrs.

Chanyeol grunts, shifting his hips to pull his pants down enough to free his erection. Baekhyun kneels and does the same, allowing Chanyeol's cock to finally,  _ finally  _ come in contact with his heated skin.

Baekhyun is not wasting any time. Not if they want to be clean and ready for bed again soon. So he takes Chanyeol's cock in his hand and guides it inside him, his body slowly inching down.

"What happened to romance?" Chanyeol asks playfully, head thrown back as he feels the pressure and heat of Baekhyun's muscles clenching around him.

"We have a lifetime to be romantic." Baekhyun voice whimpers when he finally bottoms down. He remains still for a moment to let himself get used to the feeling. Will it always feel like it's his first time? He certainly hopes it will. "For now, let me ride you."

And who is Chanyeol to protest? 

Baekhyun begins a slow roll of his hips, just allowing himself to enjoy the feeling of having Chanyeol inside him; he arches his back, supporting his weight on Chanyeol's knees. Baekhyun keeps his eyes closed, letting his mind be overwhelmed by the pleasure of feeling Chanyeol's hands roaming his body, kneading and squeezing his thighs, hips and ass, stroking his cock; fingers tracing the lines of his stomach muscles; of his name coming out of Chanyeol's mouth in between moans, full of desire. It's too much and not enough at the same time; Baekhyun wishes for all pieces of clothes to be gone, but there will be another time for that, for now, this feels good, the intimacy of being able to ask for what  _ he  _ wants and have it given it to him, no questions asked.

Baekhyun whimpers, feeling the heat pooling in his stomach. Chanyeol strokes his cock a few more times and then, Baekhyun comes with a dragged out moan, all over his pants and Chanyeol's stomach, just in time for the first firework annoucing the new year explodes behind his back, filling the cloudy night sky of light. Chanyeol comes too, just a minute later, with Baekhyun clenching down on him to add to his pleasure.

"That…" Baekhyun pants, falling down onto Chanyeol, face hidden in his neck.

"That felt different." Chanyeol agrees.

"Right?" Baekhyun smiles. "Felt amazing."

"Happy New Year, my love." Chanyeol mumbles against Baekhyun's cheek.

"Happy New Year." This time, Baekhyun kisses him, slow and sweet and lazy.

They stay like that for what it feels like a very long time until the need to be clean calls to them. A quick shower and new set of pajamas later, they are climbing back onto Chanyeol's bed. Daehyun stirrs in his sleep, blinking his eyes open.

"Is it new year already?" He asks sleepily, seeking for daddy's warmth. Baekhyun hums, pressing a kiss on his son's temple. "Happy New Year, daddy. Happy New Year, appa."

"Happy New Year, baby." Chanyeol whispers, giving his son another kiss. 

Daehyun goes back to sleep, now sandwiched in between his parents, warm and happy.

****

"Are you completely sure about this?" Baekhyun asks for the tenth time since Jenny arrived at the apartment.

"Totally." Jenny nods, ushering him and Chanyeol to the door.

"He doesn't speak English and his Korean is… well, baby Korean." Baekhyun reminds her.

"I know, I know. But I have this." Jenny pulls from her bag one of those automatic translator machines. "This little thing is very useful." 

"Butㅡ"

"Don't worry! We're gonna have a well deserved Harry Potter marathon and then Disney movies until our brains can't function. Right, Daehyunee?" Jenny activates the translator and the robotic voice of a woman repeats everything she just said.

"Yes!" Daehyun exclaims from where he's holding the girl's hand.

"See? Easy. No problem at all. Go and enjoy your date." Jenny smiles.

"No boyfriends at home." Chanyeol tells her, putting Baekhyun's jacket over his shoulder and then his own.

"Very funny." Jenny rolls her eyes.

"Call us if you need anything."

"Will do." Jenny nods, pushing them out. 

"And if youㅡ"

"Good bye!" She closes the door, then turns at Daehyun and grins. "Why don't you go put on your pajamas and I make popcorn and a lot of unhealthy snacks your daddies will kill me if they find out?"

Daehyun giggles. "Yes!" Then he runs to the bedroom.

"Yell if you need help!" 

Jenny invades the cabinet where she knows Chanyeol keeps all the snacks and pulls from candy bars, to chocolates, some sour gummies for her, popcorn and chips. This promises to be a great night. 

She's filling bowls of chips when the doorbell rings. Jenny frowns, Chanyeol didn't say anything about anyone coming over, so she goes and slowly opens the door, rolling her eyes when she sees the person standing there.

"What are you doing here?" Jenny crosses her arms against her chest.

"Is Chanyeol home?" Leah asks, peeking over Jenny's head.

"No."

"Where is he?"

"Out. With his boyfriend."

"Oh, that's a shame. I wanted to apologize for my behavior the other day. Can I come in?" And without waiting for an answer, Leah pushes her way inside.

"Well, they're not here."

"No problem I just brought this to apologize." Leah pats the box of peanut butter cookies.

"We can't have that here. Daehyun is allergic." Jenny frowns.

"Ah, the child." Jenny hums. "Okay, Iㅡ"

" _ Nenny! _ "

Leah stops at hearing the kid's voice coming from somewhere in the apartment. She quirks an eyebrow, amused at the indecisive expression on Jenny's face.

" _ Nenny! _ " Daehyun calls again.

Jenny sighs. " _ Don't  _ move from here. I'll be right back."

Jenny disappears. Leah remains standing there doing as she was told for  _ one  _ second. She spots the cookie jar on the countertop filled with chocolate chip cookies and an idea pops in her head. Silently, she approaches the counter, lifts the lid of the jar, carefully opens the box of cookies and dumps a few in, right on top for the child to easily reach them but hidden enough for an adult to miss them. What's the worst that could happen? Surely, a simple rash never killed anyone, right?

Leah puts the lid back on, closes the box and goes back to where she was standing the moment Jenny comes back with Daehyun in her arms.

"I thought you were gone." Jenny sounds irritated. She puts Daehyun back on the floor and glares.

"Nenny, can I have a cookie?" Daehyun pulls on her shirt.

"Sure, go ahead." Jenny nods.

Daehyun runs off to retrieve the baby stool to climb and reach for the plastic cookie jar.

"Oh, he's so cute. Bye." Leah fleas, closing the door behind her.

"She's so weird." Jenny mumbles to herself.

Jenny shrugs, pushing aside just how crazy she is and proceeds to set the TV in the living room for their movie night. She glances to where Daehyun is putting the lid of the jar back and then biting into the cookie. 

She moves all the bowls to the living room, wraps Daehyun on his blanket and sit on the couch. It's fifteen minutes into the first Harry Potter movie when Jenny begins to notice Daehyun's difficulty breathing.

"Daehyun?" Jenny blinks, turning to him.

Daehyun's chest moves fast, up and down, his face is red and his throat slightly swollen. The boy can't speak, but he grasps Jenny's sleeve with some desperation and tears welling up in his eyes.

"Fuck. Fuck." Jenny moves fast. She calls 911 and they tell her an ambulance will be there in ten minutes. "Fuck. Okay." She sits back with Daehyun and pulls him into her lap. "Okay, baby, you have to breathe with me, yes? Breathe with me, help is coming.

Ten minutes feel like an eternity. Paramedics arrive at the apartment and take Daehyun down as fast as they can. The Epi-pen doesn't seem to be working as they climb up the ambulance.

Chanyeol is in the middle of slicing his juicy steak when his phone buzzes. He ignores it at first, the call ends and immediately begins buzzing again. He pulls the phone out and frowns at the name blinking on the screen.

"What?" Baekhyun asks.

"It's Jen." Chanyeol slides up the green button to answer the call. "Hey, what'sㅡ" 

Baekhyun clearly sees how Chanyeol's smile slowly disappears, expression turning into fear.

"Chanyeol?" 

"Fuck." He hangs up, and stands up with a jump. "Something happened with Daehyun." He takes his wallet out and desperately struggles to pull out a bunch of bills to drop them onto the table.

Chanyeol hasn't even finished when Baekhyun is already storming out of the restaurant.

  
  
  



End file.
